Thanks, I Hate It!

Sam Speaks! she/her 20 somethin I have a horrible urge to yap and none of you are safe! Please yell with meeee

[panicpluspoison]

There are two wolves inside you

One is having a panic attack

The other says ‘Hollander you are having panic attack’ with the kind of confusion and care one usually reserves for injured wildlife

[panicpluspoison]

the craziest thing about heated rivalry (nurse she’s out again) the book and tv show is that they are SISTERS not twins but I find that sooooo satisfying

yes Rachel tell me how Shane really thinks he’s not in deep shit yet and Jacob show me the craziest yearning bottom eyes I’ve ever seen? I just find myself so in awe of how complementary they are to one another??

KNOWING Ilya thought Shane was gonna dump him at the all star game AND seeing the light return to his eyes once Shane says he got a stylist!!

Y E S you can consume either piece of media on its own but you get both the subjective view of struggling to understand your own emotions and the inherent biases in interpreting others’ feelings towards you

AND

the objective fact that they’re stupidly in love the whole time! And so bad at hiding that!!

[jewelcoatfish]

the first time shane called ilya baby he meant it in the “you big baby” sense. ilya was pouting and shane was smiling at him fondly saying “baby” but so much adoration was bleeding through his words it felt like it was delivered as a pet name. and ilya looked up at him awestruck and lovesick and looked like he could faint right then and there. so shane made it his mission to call ilya his baby all day every day

[godlessondheimite]

In 2026, the chicest thing a gay actor can do is never explicitly come out as gay but also make it abundantly clear that he is. Coming out is too modern. Staying closeted is too old fashioned. But this method merges contemporary freedom with Old Hollywood glamour and allure, and it weeds out the dumbest people who truly don’t get it. I call it the Pascal Method.

[nobodys-odyssey]

Taylor Swift does this

[godlessondheimite]

no she doesn’t

[nobodys-odyssey]

You clearly don't go here or to queer history and signaling, or both, enough to have this conversation and I'm not going to explain it to you. You could have asked questions, you could have done even a modicum of research. You didn't and you made yourself look ignorant. Goodbye.

[sanjipussyindulgence]

[strandnreyes]

“I don’t like this song because I can’t relate to it” skill issue. I’m mad at my husband I love my girlfriend I’m a lone cowboy I’m growing old I’m growing up I’m depressed I love my friends I’m perpetually horny I’m drunk at the club I love my husband again

[strandnreyes]

this is exactly what I’m talking about

[pinene]

Why are we forgetting the old texts

[kairithemang0-fm]

Reblog if you're transmasc, support trans men, or want a chocolate chip cookie

[thisisnotenuff]

see the thing is shane WOULD have mysterious powers and never know it because they just don't coincide with his hockey career. like i easily see him as being able to control the weather or something and he just doesnt gaf. the games are all indoors anyway so he doesnt care or know why it always happens to storm like crazy after the metros lose no matter where they are or what season it is. thats got nothing to do with him!

[madebymothman]

Okay was not expecting everybody to go so crazy for Shanebug (affectionate) so... More doodles lol

+ bonus Live Ilya Reaction

[literary-claustrophobia]

As soon as Shane realized he was gay, that mf Locked In. He said, we need to get this relationship Sorted, hired a stylist, and showed up to All Stars weekend ready to lock down the best dicking he had ever gotten in his life. And it worked.

[4e-hollanov]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[hudconera]

little gay yearning bottom eyes and big sexy russian to feast on

[transgenderchainsawman]

This year for pride month I want trans people to be alive. Thank you.

[rainbow-femme]

They move in together full time and Ilya notices that Anya acts differently with Shane than she does with him, more quiet and less playful, and he worries that means she doesn’t like Shane or is jealous, so he hires a dog trainer to come over and see if there’s anything they need to do to help

After a while of talking about how Anya acts the trainer says there’s nothing to worry about, Anya likes Shane just fine, it’s just that she sees him as the boss and is acting accordingly

And Ilya is like. But. I’m the one who adopted her? And raised her before Shane got here?? And the trainer is just like yeah well she sees you more like an equal. And Ilya is like WAIT she thinks Shane is in charge of both of us?? And the trainer is just like well do you interact in a way that would make her think that?

Ilya’s life flashes before his eyes as he thinks of all the times Shane has come over with a snack for Ilya and a treat for Anya, or all the times Shane has announced they’re all going for an after dinner walk, or pets Ilya’s hair and tells him he did a good job at practice, or the fact that he uses the same warning tone with Anya when she misbehaves as he does with Ilya when he’s causing problems on purpose

Shane comes home to Ilya with his face in his hands going oh god I’m not Anya’s dad I’m her brother and she thinks we’re both your pets. And Shane just goes. What.

[cuppydogshane]

not to get maudlin but im glad we have this show im glad we have this fandom im happy to have met you all and rediscovered that my existence is a positive thing that brings light to others as well as myself and not just a dark pit of nothing. Thank You Gay Sex TV Show

[baby-krill]

ANYWAY!! shane and ilya have kids via surrogate. ilya sort of makes an argument for not using his sperm on account of his depression and genetics and shane is like hey, shut the fuck up? end of conversation. also shane imagined a toddler with ilya’s unruly mop of curls one single time and now he will crash out if he doesn’t at least get a shot at making that dream come true. they do the nph/david burtka thing and each fertilize one donor egg and it’s a long shot that they’ll both take but they’re trying it anyway and they also manage to turn it into a sort of competition because they are freaks like that. both eggs take, obviously, thru the power of true love and the universe’s own unwillingness to pick a winner between the two of them. ilya full on fucking cries one summer when the kids are 3 and they’re getting them ready for bed after a long day outside at the cottage and he notices the tiniest smattering of freckles across the bridge of his toddler’s nose. shane of course gets his curly haired baby because he is the #1 I Get Everything I Want Through the Power of Visualization motherfucker this world has ever seen.

[russianblush]

#hudpits for @hudpits

[emziess]

Oliver Stark as Evan “Buck” Buckley 9-1-1, S09E13 - Mother's Boy