PastryOlympics

Icon by my lovely husband <3 Luna, MoonBeam, or Pastry ⭒ Adult ⭒ She/He ﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎ The only correct Cookie Run fan, obsessive archiver of all information on Earth, and #1 Royal Berry fan. I am also Royal Berry's only fan. I usually read stories towards the end of an update; expect posts about story content long after everyone else is done talking about it. I accept complaints on the 32nd of every month. Proud to be the only member of the Cookie Run fandom who can read.

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Finally, Purelily.

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Mostly just posting this to break the weird hang up in my brain for me, read it or don't.

Spoilers for Beast Yeast Episode 15, in case you're three fucking updates behind in the story like moi~

So like- Lily's dead or whatever. I haven't actually read the chapter, so I don't know how it goes down. I am, in fact, three chapters behind, because my partner and I have been trying to get through all of the Odyssey and then the dragon story right after.

We're both pretty sure the info in there is relevant to the war, so we wanna finish it first, but because you can only do ten quill quests a day, Devsis made a hard limit on how quickly you can progress in that stupid thing. Combine that with us being adults with jobs and moving houses and fuck me, we never stood a chance.

So, I haven't read anything beyond Beast Yeast 12, but I do know she died. And I found that out, through the STUPIDEST PLACE POSSIBLE. Elder Faerie's page.

You're telling me the Kingdom wiki can't update to SAVE IT'S DAMN LIFE, BUT IT CAN TELL ME LILY'S DEAD IN THE FIRST SECTION OF A DIFFERENT CHARACTER'S PAGE.

I went there to get a sprite. That was it. Didn't even get it after seeing that.

I suppose it's probably a moot point, because the mid-month update was the very next day and the epilogue's little cutscene descriptions make it pretty obvious she's dead, even if you just skip them for the rewards.

And like- here's the thing: I knew this was going to happen. I have been telling my partner since we heard Lily's awakened form for the first time that they were going to kill her. I knew they were. Her language and tone in her lines made it SO OBVIOUS.

^Like, I'm not kidding, I have been talking about this for MONTHS.

Which, was SUCH a downer, by the way. I spent so long eagerly awaiting Lily's awakened form: the therapy form for every other ancient - for Lily to have lines of self-acceptance and closure. And I got THAT instead. Bro, I was so upset.

So, my point is, it wasn't unexpected, but it was annoying, upsetting, and an obnoxious way to find out. And because I had such a feeling it was coming, and was pretty convinced they'd kill her this update in particular, I've been avoiding my little shit post dumpster because god forbid I post something about Lily and get "I'm so sad she died 😭" and "Fly high Lily 🕊️" comments confirming all my fears.

Bro, I'm so tired of being right about everything all the time...

But, now I know, so I suppose it doesn't matter that much, but my brain obligates me to post I know that and only that before I continue shitposting like nothing happened.

Lily is a fictional character and is exactly as alive as you want her to be. And I want her to be. Do not grieve her here, please.

My AU is better than the cannon story anyway/silly

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Do you think it's weird?

That the Duel of Destiny: Truth and Deceit round has three bosses?

And one of them is Shadow Milk

And one of them is Black Sapphire

And the other one is a fucking lizard?

And no one of value was missing~

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Did... Did they just call him fat??

Why the actual fuck are these grown ass cookies calling an orphan fat??

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Hi, so, during ✨ Black Sapphire's End of Year Dinner Show, ✨ there was a side story/fourth wall break which wasn't added to the Hall of Records.

In it, Black Sapphire switched from English to Korean, and I wanted to see if in the original Korean, he switched to English. Couldn't find it online, so I changed the language of the game myself.

SO, in case you missed it, have secret forbidden Barrett Leddy lines:

And ykw, while I'm at it, have all the in-game reviews for the Dinner Show, because the Kingdom Wiki would rather die than update:

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A real clash of the titans here.

Update:

She got her ass kicked.

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I actually did send this in.

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OH MY GOD, THAT'S W O R SE

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Not to be dramatic, but I MIGHT scream

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HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT

It is THE BEST title they have EVER released. If I get knocked out of this tier in the next 3 days, I might explode.

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LET'S FUCKIN' GOOOOOO

Thank You, this is everything I've ever wanted.

Joining the ranks of my very favorite titles I've earned:

Completely Annihilated my economy

O h n o

The two f u n n i e s t Salt Wraith Rumble tiles

Guy who kicked Shadow Milk's Ass

and the most metal title in the whole game

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Cacao looks really weird.

Like his mouth looks too close.

How would it look with his actual eyes??

Oh. Never mind, he looks fine.

Now he's feeling left out :(

Much better! You guys can take off the sunglasses now.

Oh. Oh no.

Quick! Give him his face back!

N- No. No, that's not right.

Uh oh.

...Can we at least give them the glasses back?

...Cacao is staring into my soul

Please. Give him a face. Any face.

Oh!

All better now :)

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OH MY GOD, THAT'S W O R SE

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Not to be dramatic, but I MIGHT scream

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HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT

It is THE BEST title they have EVER released. If I get knocked out of this tier in the next 3 days, I might explode.

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OH MY GOD, THAT'S W O R SE

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Not to be dramatic, but I MIGHT scream

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OH MY GOD, THAT'S W O R SE

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Legit crazy when he said this

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So, during the most recent campfire mini game, they actually allowed us to practice without rewards. So, I did a bunch of practice rounds in an attempt to perfect my timing for that elusive golden marshmallow.

I never actually got the marshmallow, if you're curious.

But, there is something expertly funny about Shadow Milk crashing out as I continuously hand him more and more marshmallows he did not ask for. Get fucked, you stupid clown.

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Hi, here's all the Guardian of the Rift bonds from the Alliance if you missed them, because the Kingdom wiki would rather die than update.

Don't feel bad if you didn't get them all. Coming from the guy who did, it 100% was not worth it.