Cringe Queen™

[logically-asexual]

women’s standards for men are so low i was talking to a friend happy about what a boy said and she replied “that’s so nice! i mean it’s the bare minimum he should do but still how cute ashdjsjk.”

and i’m like yeah,, this sums it up.

[frottinq]

thinking of the time I ordered olive garden online and I put “please speak to me in an Italian accent” in the special requests category and completely forgot about it, and when I went to pick it up the guy comes out and goes “eyyy I got-a your-a order bappada boopity!” and when I told him he didn’t actually have to do it he was like “a-nooo I was-a looking forward to it! I was-a the only one-a brave enough to do it!”

[susemoji]

that woman you just called fat? it’s the moon. that boy you just called ugly? it’s a bike. that woman you called anorexic? that’s a lamppost. the man you called gay for kissing his boyfriend? its a woman. you need glasses.

[spacemancharisma]

so here’s the problem. I once yelled because I saw a centipede and my boyfriend commentated “a friend!” and when I said “no!” he added “and maybe....... a lover..” the problem is. now this has become standard procedure for referring to centipedes. so now I get messages like:

[toadscools]

WHY IS MY NAME BEEF IN YOUR PHONE

[spacemancharisma]

you know................. like bf...............

[teslacoils-and-hubris]

Idk what mad scientist needs to hear this today but your googles and lab coat are incredibly flattering and all your expirments will blow away the scientific community who called you a fool

[cornedbeefhashtags]

I think my favorite thing about September is how completely lawless it is. There are no rules. Someone just biked past you in shorts and a winter coat. A bartender just offered you a pumpkin spice summer shandy. The pool is open, but it’s decorated for Halloween.

[pulse-and-conjure]

It’s September?!

[notallmensheviks]

catholic pez

[rat-mama]

[mitski-miyawakis]

[shoelace-and-friends]

[spacecrygirl]

[notallmensheviks]

good work everyone

[jewishzevran]

This thread is a few years old but it bears repeating. I’m tired of being treated as if I am invisible. Listen to Jewish voices when we talk about fascism. I am begging you.

[firefox-official]

bumps into a pole and apologizes all giggly and flirty

[june2734]

New era, new slogan.

[anthonycrowleymoved]

idk guys can we all report this etsy shop for like, actively trying to further covid during a global pandemic. can we please do that. is that allowed

[penispenispenisiwin]

If anyone’s wondering, she’s selling lace masks because they’re so ‘breathable’ but what she’s not factoring in, is that she’s killing people.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Satanic Abortions cut through unconstitutional abortion laws

States across the US have enacted cruel, unconstitutional abortion laws that require doctors to sexually assault women seeking abortions and lie to them about the health impacts of abortion. Some laws require funerals for foetal remains. These laws were pushed by ALEC, the corporate-backed “legislative exchange” that pushes “model legislation” through a network of slick lobbyists in state-houses across the country. ALEC purports to be in favor of “liberty” and “small government.” Enter the Satanic Temple, a federally recognized religion whose members do not believe in Satan or supernatural phenomena. They believe “that religion can, and should, be divorced from superstition.” The Temple has a fantastic schtick. They go to places where christofascists have gotten laws passed that shove their weird, apostate version of “Christianity” down everyone else’s throats and point out that the First Amendment requires nondiscrimination among faiths. Wanna put a giant stone Ten Commandments in front of your courthouse? Sure. But they’re gonna put a giant statue of Baphomet right next to it. The court challenges they mount aren’t cheap, but they’re slam dunks. The US Constitution is pretty clear on this. Now, in 1993, Chuck Schumer sponsored the “Religious Freedom Restoration Act” which lets Americans sue governments over laws that “substantially burdens a person’s exercise of religion.” https://www.congress.gov/bill/103rd-congress/house-bill/1308 Religious maniacs LOVE the RFRA and its progeny, like SCOTUS’s Hobby Lobby decision, which broadened the RFRA’s provisions and allowed corporations to claim exemptions from Rendering Unto Caesar where that interfered with the owners’ faith. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Burwell_v._Hobby_Lobby_Stores,_Inc. Guess what you get when you combine the RFRA, ALEC’s restrictive abortion laws, and the Satanic Temple? That’s right…SATANIC ABORTIONS. https://announcement.thesatanictemple.com/rrr-campaign41280784 A Satanic Abortion is a religious ritual that is totally indistinguishable from a normal, medical abortion, except that the participant says a few self-affirming words about her bodily autonomy. Oh, also: the ritual absolutely forbids, as a bedrock matter of religous conviction, any waiting periods, the withholding of medically necessary advice, mandatory counseling, required readings, and unnecessary sonograms. Also forbidden: mandatory fetal heartbeat listening sessions and compulsory fetal burials. If you want an abortion and the doctor tries this bullshit, hand them one of these exemption letters explaining how the law doesn’t apply thanks to the RFRA. https://www.dropbox.com/s/mup4nee1n9wkvqb/Religious%20Abortion%20Exemption%20Letter.pdf Now, the religious right could fight this. But if they win…they overturn the RFRA, and Hobby Lobby has to provide its employees with contraception and all the other theocratic exemptions go poof, too. The Temple is pretty amazing. Here’s some highlights of their previous campaigns: “Publicly confronted hate groups, fought for the abolition of corporal punishment in public schools, applied for equal representation when religious installations are placed on public property, provided religious exemption and legal protection against laws that unscientifically restrict women’s reproductive autonomy, exposed harmful pseudo-scientific practitioners in mental health care, organized clubs alongside other religious after-school clubs in schools besieged by proselytizing organizations, and engaged in other advocacy in accordance with our tenets.”

[mina-ahavi]

[duckymomo-enthusiast]

the caption says: “Guys I’m so tired and I couldn’t get through it I’m sorry”

[2-beadyeyes-deactivated20251104]

[whitecop]

imagine stickin ur dick in a freshly poured cup of mcdonalds sprite

[draconym]

Naturalists have got to be one of the groups of people most susceptible to being tricked by the fae. Travellers these days are much less likely to follow a mysterious light or the smell of roast beef into the forest. Meanwhile, find me a naturalist who would not completely lose themself in pursuit of:

An unidentifiable bird call

A butterfly that's slightly off-color

An opossum with its head stuck in a yogurt tub

A really big woodpecker