poopy

Kangaroos can't jump backwards

[imperialmog]

The 4th of July, its the day that people put American flags outside their homes expecting a visit from Captain America who arrives in a sleigh powered by eight bald eagles giving fireworks, who then goes and has his birthday party.

[scaryknife]

me (no musical talent): dude lets start a band 

[fuks]

[shibafro]

whenever my art gets 5+ notes:

[shibafro]

When it hits 10 notes: 

[piercersuzanne]

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Anodization in action. This is how we safely change the colour of your jewellery, no paints, sprays or coatings - just electrical voltage. For you nerds out there the eltrical voltage is changing the thickness of the oxide layer, which causes it to refract light at different spectrum levels, thus giving the appearance of different colour. Anodizing is completely safe for fresh and healed piercings and for long term wear. You can also change the colour of your already anodized jewellery to a different one further down the spectrum and have faded jewellery re-anodised. At @thepiercingurge we provide this service free of charge so you can look that extra rad without breaking the bank.

[jellyisyum]

these damn wizards have crossed the line with their alchemy this time

[pennanpayper]

me: *drives by a pond with a "HONK IF YOU LIKE BEING A GOOSE" bumper sticker on my car*

geese: *goes wild*

[transhonneybee]

swaggity psy do not cry

oppa gangnam smile

[transhonneybee]

im 100% sure i was fucking high when i wrote this

[straightboyfriend]

you've heard of the big bad wolf, now get ready for

small good cat

[fantasticcatadventures-deactiva]

[dutchstore]

[pardonmewhileipanic]

i don’t recall making this vine but obviously it must have happened at some point because this is 1000000000000% me

[kuroheta]

mywholelifeisbutter

[slimetony]

[pennanpayper]

brain: instead of going to bed now, lets stay up another 5 hours doing nothing productive.

me: why

brain: you gotta

[melonboyy]

[champagnepuppies]

[nflstreet-deactivated20180710]

The laces are there are there to throw the soap to your dudes that also want to have a Man Shower with the bros

[captainhavoc]

[zializia-deactivated20150606]

so you just gonna bring me a birthday gift on my birthday to my birthday party on my birthday with a birthday gift

[joshpeck]

THIS NEVER GETS OLD

[iguanamouth]

first date ideas: show your date to everybody in town… wearing a salmon suit

[tastefullyoffensive]

(via Bubba the Cat)

[slavery]

Me: *tip-toes in moms room at 3am* Me: mommy…u up? Mom: yes hunny is everything alr- Me: then why ain’t you murderin that mothfukin like?