my understanding of the character progression on number five
preface: i don't ship five with lila and think it more along the lines of forbidden love. what happened in season 4 is something i wish didn’t happen but could understand what was likely plotted out by the writers.
five from pre-s1: he was surviving a post-apocalyptic wasteland where he should’ve died for all intents and purposes. however, he did survive against all odds with his family as his guiding lights. or rather the idealised versions of his family that he envisioned in his head and what was written in viktor’s autobiography. while he may have also seen some of their exploits and characters through the infinity switchboard, those were probably more of snippets that served to reinforce his illusions of them. he can’t possibly watch what he missed of his family’s lives because the infinity switchboard would be very tightly guarded, especially if five is around; he would probably escorted and shown those snippets rather than allowed control over it.
five from s1: the first disillusionment that was blatantly presented in the show was when viktor dismissed his trauma. five expected viktor to go along with the revelation of the world ending, likely not even expectecting help to figure out what causes it, but that viktor would listen, at least. another disillusionment is likely that klaus was, unexpectedly, better in reality than five had imagined him to be; more than just a junkie and the family’s disappointment.
five from s2: another disillusionment with viktor was when they came to a head, with five seeing viktor if free of the drugs and the memories of the umbrella academy. there was also another disillusionment with mostly everyone when they failed to arrive within that hour he set for them, just expecting everyone to drop everything they’re doing and the lives they’ve built.
five from s3: here, we see five finally showing signs and effects of being disillusioned from s1 and s2, willingly giving up trying to save them. by this point, he was already so tired and had retired before being pulled back into the thick of things. we also see his relationship with lila progressing from enemies to frenemies to neutral or even cordial.
five from post-s3 pre-s4: from an interview with the actor, we learn five is lost in life and without purpose, disillusioned with his scattered family living their new lives, no longer seeing them as his guiding light.
five from s4: we see his relationship with lila has already become at the same level as his family’s. five and lila just diving into the multiversal subway and getting lost in it together wasn’t really how i would’ve wanted that relationship culminating but i find more potential for them together than with lila and diego due to an understanding of their shared trauma that they would likely have kept sealed and hidden away.
side note: i think that, if she wasn’t pregnant from s2, lila and diego wouldn’t have lasted one year and that she would’ve been on the wind.
another side note: on the fandom, i think most people idealizing five as this immutable and unchanging character focused solely, tunnel-visioned on and can only live for his family, just as five was idealizing what he remembered and what was written of his family. this likely stems from all the fanfictions that writes him as such, disregarding the fact that, just like the other characters in the show (except reginald, abigail, grace and pogo), he is, in fact, human. he should be allowed to be selfish, to live for himself, to seek and accept love from others (platonic, romantic, etc.) he already tried to seek love from his siblings and where did that get him? he likely won't be able form any sort of lasting romantic relationships with anyone else other than lila (and isn't that just sad?) unless most his memories were removed (even then, there is still the possibility he would regain those).
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