fictional characters my beloved

Phoenix | They/Them | here for fandoms and shitposting | DMs always open | no hate | no ai

[befuddled-calico-whump]

"I'd destroy the world to protect you" but it's a parent/child relationship

[befuddled-calico-whump]

"I hate everyone but I love you more than anything" but it's two best friends

[befuddled-calico-whump]

"you're the only one who can bring me back when I lose myself" but it's siblings

[sistertaxon]

why are there so many posts about asexuals being immune to sirens. people. sirens don’t lure you in with sex (necessarily). they sing about whatever it is that you want most. they could sing about mothman or cinnamon toast crunch and guess what then your asexual pirate is fucking dead

[thesylverlining]

this is the only kind of ace discourse i ever want to see on my dash. the only kind. ever again. good job

[kittyknowsthings]

Do you think the sirens would be grateful that they finally get some variety? 

[systlin]

“Oh my god we can finally just sing about pasta thank the fucking gods.” 

[totohoy-blog]

I’m not asexual but I’m fairly certain sirens would do a far better job luring me into the depths with a song about pasta rather than sex…

[systlin]

I mean. 

“WHAT THE FUCK STAY AWAY FROM THE ROCKS.”

“FUCKER THEY SAID THEY HAVE FETTUCCINE CARBONARA AND HOT GARLIC BREAD OVER THERE HANG ON BITCH.” 

[musicalhell]

This is true; Odysseus heard them promising him knowledge of the future.  So the next time you see artwork like this:

Remember those sultry naked chicks are saying “We’ll tell you the winning lotto numbers.”

[fuckstaffposts]

Them: “We have unlimited wifi at incredible speeds~” Me: *diving headfirst into the water*

[rpluvsyj]

This post is a blessing

[wittyusername97]

Congratulations! Odysseus! You’ve been selected as a winner for the free $1000 Amazon Gift Card, Apple iPhone X 256G or Samsung Galaxy S8! Claim your prize now!

[kitvalkyrie]

Oh my god sirens were literally scam websites

[10thingsihateabout-all-yall]

Oh my god they were phishing

[fellshish]

i’m so glad goncharov happened pre ai slop era

[romanitas]

#weird way to describe 1973 but i guess it’s accurate

[virgomoon]

i don't like the way you people talk about addiction. i don't like the way you people talk about bpd. i don't like the way you people talk about eating disorders. i don't like the way you people talk about paranoia. i don't like the way you people talk about ocd and intrusive thoughts. i don't like the way you people talk about cluster b personality disorders. i don't like the way you people talk about autism. i don't like the way you people talk about disabilities. i don't like the way you people talk about lesbians.

[exhuastedpigeon]

The first rule of fandom is have fun. The second rule of fandom is find an enabler and become an enabler. Yes you should write that fic. What if it was even hornier? What if it was angstier? What if you wrote it just for me?

[simkaye]

Anyone else feel like it’s been one of those days since 2019?

[nothing-but-flowers]

screaming

[zeedumbo]

Fuck you AI Art

[pixxyofice]

make that trio polyamorous

[cleaningouttherooms]

just like cop shows love engineering scenarios where they can go damn we would have caught the serial puppy killer by now if only police had even more money and power, doctor shows love engineering scenarios where they can go damn we would have solved every problem with this patient's body by now if only patients weren't so pigheaded and lazy and entitled and dishonest

[goldcrescent]

I also think that the strength gap is at least partially manufactured women would in fact be stronger overall if little girls were encouraged to do physically taxing games and activities and eat their fill while they’re growing vs having to constantly diet and be sedentary indoors (or god forbid do intense cardio while under-eating). The amount of adult women honestly afraid to lift weights bc they think they’ll get bulky as though bulking isn’t a full time job that athletes have to spend all their time on and anyone on earth gets shredded from just using their adult muscles for their intended purpose, girl your bone density 🥀

[goldcrescent]

if you say women are intentionally nerfed from birth in 2026 people look at you like you’re insane and start condescendingly telling you about how women are just better at different things (but not during their periods haha) but this was a completely basic feminist talking point I grew up with like “girls can do it too! [shot of little girls climbing and running with boys]” nickelodeon commercial tier base level I hate it how is everyone suddenly dumber than the average 7 year old

[picascribit]

There are 2 types of fanfic:

fanfic that I like

fanfic that is none of my business

[gatesofminrathous]

there will never be anything as funny as the mutual disbelief between long form and short form fic writers about each other's style.

short form writers look at people writing 100k+ fics as though this is some sort of talent given as part of a fae bargain, that the commitment required shows some sort of ungodly mental fortitude.

meanwhile long form writers look at people writing 1000 word one shots like god I would cut off my left nipple to be able to say anything concisely. i would love to play with multiple ideas. free me from the shackles of this child I have birthed. i love them but I now must take them to t-ball and doctor's appointments and they're going to destroy everything I own.

[recurring-polynya]

never lose hope. somewhere, a middle-aged, gender ambiguous person with an advanced degree in an esoteric field and a fiber arts hobby could be crashing out and pinning all their remaining mental health on getting obsessed with your otp. any day now, the most elegantly written 100k fanfic you have ever read is going to hit ao3. it could happen. it has happened.

[jessicas-pi]

Y'know, I see a lot of posts urging people to comment on fics, so I just want to say, to all the people who do comment, and especially the long commenters:

thank you.

Long comments can be time-consuming. They can be difficult to write, but you leave them anyway!

Thank you, thank you, thank you, to everyone who comments.

You are the highlight of fanfiction writers' days.

[younggayanddoingokay]

Project hail mary time travel au where grace doesn't actually tell anyone he time-traveled or allude to it at all and tries to act as normally as possible but also keeps insisting on certain things for the ship (like a probe that can handle a planet's atmosphere) or insists on doing experiments in certain weird ways that took ages of trial and error to get to the first time around but he immediately gets results in like batshit crazy ways. sometimes he just forgets stuff (like little stuff) hasnt actually happened yet or he'll mention some aspect of the coma bot that lamai hasn't actually invented/figured out yet but that wasn't his specialty the first time and he doesn't know the timeline or realize that she hasn't come up with it yet and she's like 'wtf that's a great idea? how did he know this? why did he talk about it like i'd already figured it out?' he makes comments on elections/politics and accidentally predicts things because he simply doesn't realize that they havent happened yet.

hes like 'peter parker coming up with excuses for why hes doing weird shit' levels of bad at hiding his secret identity as a time traveler. he never says a word but the whole vat eventually figures it out anyway because theres simply no other explanation that makes sense to them. Stratt has an unofficial rule that if grace mentions an idea for the ship or something offhanded then it happens right away. embezzler bob keeps prying him for stock advice and he's like 'what the heck i know nothing about finance why are you asking?' it's an open secret on the vat that grace time traveled and everyone knows that everyone else knows except for grace who thinks nobody knows and then one day ilyukhina is just like 'hey grace did we meet aliens up in space the first time you did this?' and hes like 'oh yea totally, rockys great... hey WAIT A MINUTE?'

[the-quasar-hero]

Very generally speaking, when you see a black man in a piece of media, be it tv show, movie, video game, etc. there’s something you often see a lot of writers do. To go against the stereotype of black men (and black people in general) being dumb and lazy, you’ll see this black male character being smart and an achiever. 

The Black Nerd. A common character type, the nerd will always be very interested in all things nerdy: science, video games, mathematics, etc. In an continued effort to combat stereotypes, the Black Nerd will be lack athleticism, probably being asthmatic (the nerdiest of conditions). The Black Nerd will dress smartly, suspenders and bow ties. They’ll always talk smart too, using proper English with complex words.

Now, I don’t have a problem with a black character being a nerd, indeed black people are a people; we aren’t all the same and we all have varying personalities. The problem I have is that too often we see a distinct disconnect between Blackness and the Black Nerd. The Black Nerd doesn’t listen to hip hop or rap, only classical music. The Black Nerd only has white friends, the only other black characters are into not nerdy stuff. The Black Nerd never ever uses AAVE at any time in any context.

And again I must say that Black people, not being a monolith, there are no hard fast rules to being Black. I’m more than sure there are Black people like what I’ve described above, I’m not saying it’s impossible; what I’m getting at is that the only Black Nerd we see. There are Black Nerds that play basketball, that bump Kendrick Lamar, and use AAVE since it’s an ever changing dialect. I’m just saying there’s no one way of being a nerd and no one way of being Black.

[the-quasar-hero]

Well @dumbey, seems we’re in similar boats

[the-quasar-hero]

This ain’t about him, this is about Black/Asian solidarity. Focus.