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@photographercsr
Suffering
I want it to happen For the world to fall Blood dripping down my wrist I hear that crimson red on white is quite beautiful The sky can cease to be It can all tumble down on me I'm already limp and motionless So why can't my body be the same So yes, I want it all to happen For I've lived long enough to know That this pathetic pattern we've give through is worthless So just end the pain, and stop I am the model in all the photos.
Talking to Oneself
The only reason why these photos exist is because I found a form of therapy in them. I wanted to convey messages of negative self-talk. Basically I’m took 10 different situations/emotions: discouraged, deformity, body image, bitter/bitterness, abuse, self-hate, self-destruction, judged, self-pity, and jealousy. I shot pictures of myself in different colored dresses (specific for the situation), in different positions, with text that conveys their feelings/self-talk, and made sure to always have the face covered to show them feeling defined by their problems. I feel that this is very close to myself since I am having some personal issues with myself and been talking negatively about myself. When I took these photos I was going through a cycle of self-hate, and I needed to express that in one way or another. I at first thought that these weren’t me, only self-hate and discouraged, but after some time I realized that I am seven out of ten of these forms of negative self-talk. Having this realization helped me understand another meaning for this shoot: we often don’t realize that we are these things until we get a second look and think about it. We see these pictures the first time and think, “How horrible,” or “I feel bad for them,” or “That could never be me.” After we look at the text and ourselves, then analyze who we are, we notice that we are them. You have to face the fact that you are wounded inside and hurt. You are your own worse enemy and you shouldn’t ignore the problem. You need to face your inner voice and stop hurting yourself.
I am the model in all of these photos.
Music belongs to Emilie Autumn, but I got Melissa's permission to use it as long as I'm not using it for profit (and I'm not, and also a great big thank you for allowing me to use the music). The characters, story, and drawings are all mine (although the story/characters are based off/mashups of fairytales). The story this is from is called Singing in the Lake and it is about a girl, Rampion, who is both like Rapunzel and Shalott. It starts with her "mother/"Gothel, Alice, dying. In this, Gothel and Rampion actually were close and cared for each other.
The stop motion is basically showing Rampion dealing with Gothel's death (btw, both scenes/memories with Rampion touching Gothel's hand are when Gothel was dying).
I drew all of the images (beside the background).
Ophelia Set 4
Photos from my stop motion, Ophelia to Emilie Autumn's song, 306. I am the model in all the photos.
Ophelia Set 3
Photos from my stop motion, Ophelia to Emilie Autumn's song, 306. I am the model in all the photos.
Ophelia Set 2
Photos from my stop motion, Ophelia to Emilie Autumn's song, 306. I am the model in all the photos.
Ophelia Set 1
Photos from my stop motion, Ophelia to Emilie Autumn's song, 306. I am the model in all the photos.
Music belongs to Emilie Autumn, but I got Melissa’s permission to use it as long as I’m not using it for profit (and I’m not, and also a great big thank you for allowing me to use the music).
I am the model.
Psychoses Part 2
f these photos have a goal, it is this: to capture the emotional and physical state that certain mental disorders have afflicted on those with these psychoses. There is a constant theme of black and white or sepia tones somewhere on the photos to give a sense of absence or misunderstanding. There are also intensified colors to give a special feeling of the problems one would feel with the psychosis. I also have the model wearing a patient gown to tell you that they are a patient of some sort. Mental disorders have always been a part of my life and those around me. The psychological world has also fascinated me for such a long time but it deeply saddens me of how many misconceptions there are of it. I decided to use photography as way to interpret the pain of those with the psychoses and how strongly there conditions affect them and can be quite terrifying. Mental disorders are just like any other physical problem: it hurts and it can be treated, but in some cases few can be cured and most cause death. Many don’t understand what these people are going through; they don’t even clearly understand the psychosis before they make judgment calls. It’s time to put an end to this.
I am the model in all the photos.
Psychoses Part 1
f these photos have a goal, it is this: to capture the emotional and physical state that certain mental disorders have afflicted on those with these psychoses. There is a constant theme of black and white or sepia tones somewhere on the photos to give a sense of absence or misunderstanding. There are also intensified colors to give a special feeling of the problems one would feel with the psychosis. I also have the model wearing a patient gown to tell you that they are a patient of some sort. Mental disorders have always been a part of my life and those around me. The psychological world has also fascinated me for such a long time but it deeply saddens me of how many misconceptions there are of it. I decided to use photography as way to interpret the pain of those with the psychoses and how strongly there conditions affect them and can be quite terrifying. Mental disorders are just like any other physical problem: it hurts and it can be treated, but in some cases few can be cured and most cause death. Many don’t understand what these people are going through; they don’t even clearly understand the psychosis before they make judgment calls. It’s time to put an end to this.
I am the model in all the photos. You can find one of these photo's in Gothesque Jr.'s Debut issue http://www.gothesquemagazine.com/jr/issue-1-vol-1/
LOVE
Photography inspired by Nan Goldin. I am the model in all the photos.
Her Golden Regrets
Despite my cries, he took me. Believing his pretty lies, he took me. Slip through the buttons, he took me. Crystal pouring like fountains, he took me. Off with my white blouse, he took me. Such a pathetic frighten mouse, he took me. Throat soar from all my screams, he took me. Begging to end this scene, he took me. I am the model in all the photos. You can find one of these photo's in Gothesque Jr.'s Debut issue http://www.gothesquemagazine.com/jr/issue-1-vol-1/
Photography I took with a film camera and developed in a dark room.
The first three are Inspired by Emilie Autumn's The Asylum for Wayward Victorian Girls.
The last one is inspired by Sophie Calle and the model is SupaTuna Cosplay/SugarBunny Cosplay.
Curious
Inspired by Lewis Carroll's Alice in Wonderland. I am the model in all the pictures.
A Vampire Named Vanity
The photo series is about the life of this vampire woman. Before she was changed, she was very vain and very much in love with herself and her reflection. The woman used to bathe in the blood of beautiful young girls just as Elizabeth Báthory. One day a vampire offers her immortality to stay young and beautiful forever, so she accepts. But the price for her vanity (and bloodlust) was that she could never see her reflection again (as it is a myth that vampires can't see their reflections).
I am the model in all the photos. Can find a few entered in Irvington High School's NMAA Media Festival: http://nmaaihs.org/mediafest-entries/mediafest-2014-still-images/
Check out my photography, modeling, and poetry in Gothesque Jr. Debut's issue. I am C.S.R. and this was my first time being published.
http://www.gothesquemagazine.com/jr/issue-1-vol-1/