phySex

Gaming Blog for mild to extremely informed gamers.

[physex]

PicoReview: Space Engineers

PicoReviews are short reviews that give a little insight into how a game plays, whether I deem it worth your time, and, of course; whether I like it. 

Today I'm crashing, welding, and drilling my way through Keen Software House's 'Space Engineers'. 

Let me get this out of the way first; I absolutely adore this game. There's a reason I chose it as the star of the first 'PicoReview' - because it's so easy to write about something you love. 

The game forces you to 'engineer' your own craft to carry out the tasks that you give yourself. Here on the left is a ship I built to mine, in the middle is a fighter ship. Both built by raw materials I mined out of asteroids, refined into basic parts and welded together to create a working ship to do all of that work for me. 

Space Engineers is all about emergent gameplay, that is; you get out what you put in. This game isn't going to force-feed you a story and have you 'saving the world' in a matter of hours. This game gives you the tools, the resources, and the vastness of space to use them in. 

A ship built solely to mine asteroids. The drills link to cargo storage and the cargo storage links to an ejector that spits out the minerals directly into the refinery for processing - all designed by me; the player. Industry!

In saying that, however - I must also mention that this type of game is of my taste. I love being given freedom to create my own goals and achieve them. I struggle to attach myself to games that shove 'epic' storylines down my throat and usually tire of them before they can teach me a single game mechanic (usually shoot things). Space Engineers gives me a drill, a welder, and a grinder and says nothing to me.. 106 hours later and I'm still hooked. 

A look at a ship in the welding stage. Parts are laid out with a bare-bones structure and the player is required to bring the smaller parts to it and weld it all together. Sounds tedious, but I found it quite relaxing.

Space Engineers is a game about industry. You mine for iron using a hand-held drill to build a ship that has a bigger drill. You use that ship to mine for more iron to design and build a ship that welds new ships so you don't have to. You use those ships to build a mothership that carries all of these things around space.. you get the picture. One thing's for sure; Keen Software House are great at what they do. I've been playing Space Engineers since a week before the first alpha was officially released on the 23rd of October, 2013 and they have been relentlessly updating every week since then. They currently have a new game in development called Medieval Engineers, soon to be released into alpha in a similar fashion. I absolutely cannot wait.

Kudos, Keen Software House.

Space Engineers - 8/10

[physex]

Whoosh!

/respawn 

I'm proud to announce that OG 1337 site phySex, sister of the no0b site www.flunkus.com is breathing once again.  If anyone is still following - answer me this:  Would you like to see longer, more in-depth content and reviews once a week let's say.. or would you prefer quickfire shortened mini-reviews that might occur daily or every off-day? Hit me up with your feedback and I'm going to pick a game I like and write up my first quick-scope review for you, my darling phySex followers. Thanks for not unfollowing! :3 

[physex]

Cleanup on aisle.. the one with the aliens

 It's like someone cut someone's arm off and motor-boated the wound Due to its alpha-state, we were battling with hilariously annoying glitches on top of the innumerable body parts and assorted other nic-nacs that lined the halls, each one required to be picked up and put in a basket for incineration. Pirakeet experienced run-away baskets that would shoot in any random direction when she so much as dropped a bullet casing in them.. I had a tendency to kick pieces of human at super-sonic speed while mopping the floor.. it all lead to a sometimes frustrating, though very entertaining experience for both of us. I should mention that mopping, fixing bullet holes, and picking body parts up is really all you do in this game.. ..and you will pick up every single thing. Mop every single bloodstain. Fix every single bullet hole. You mustn't even do so much as leave a chair on its side, or accidentally forget a bucket when you leave the level; lest you return to your quaint little office to find newspaper clippings of your failure. This grading system is light on statistics but heavy on charm, and it was a welcome addition to an already left-field title that I remain heavily interested in as it goes through development, and I think you should definitely check it out!

Full review (if it is written) will be done when the game is properly released, until then I advise you to be wary of your early-access purchases as you do not want to be found wanting when it comes to the actual release of the game, a lesson learnt by the abandonment of the ill-fated Towns. Thanks for reading (if I still have any followers), hope you had a very good Mother's Day and hopefully I'll be posting more content in the near future. -phySex ('Flunkus')

[pirakeet]

THIS HAPPENED! THIS. ME. LYDELA.

*FLAILING UNCONTROLLABLY* Special thanks to Kortii for the paintbrush AND wig…. words cannot express my undying love for you!

[physex]

When worlds collide.. Beautiful marriage of the Elder Scrolls and Neopets universes by the master of both; Pirakeet.

Meet Sheogorwoof, the Neopian Prince of Madness. 

[physex]

I don't usually post things like this, but...

http://i.minus.com/iBzvb2JSpQNRM.gif It's too big to put on here, but it's fucking hilarious. 

[physex]

NOBODY CARES IF YOU HAD FUN.  DON'T YOU SEE, YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE A NAME.

I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOU, I JUST WANT ITEMS.

Not for you to enjoy yourself having a merry time jumping down holes... ITEMS.

[physex]

Videogame typeface.. game!

via Kotaku courtesy of Paul Brown. 

These are my answers: (left to right) Minecraft - God of War - Gran Turismo - Viva Pinata - *** - *** - *** - Star Fox? - Unreal Tournament - Super Mario - Final Fantasy - L.A Noire - *** - *** - Yoshi's Island - Tetris - *** - *** - Doom - Half Life - Fallout - Mass Effect - *** - Rock Band - Sonic - Left 4 Dead - Pikmin - Grand Theft Auto - *** - Scribblenauts - Garry's Mod? - Crysis - Pokemon - Portal - *** - *** - Pacman - Halo - Lemmings - Zelda - Metal Gear Solid - *** - Gears of War - *** - Contra - *** - Fable - ***

[physex]

Cash, Balls, Mobile Phones, and Controlled Explosions

I honestly can't decide which one of these I'm looking forward to the most. 

Although something tells me that my Achilles heel is about to rear its very hot 12 cylinder head..

[physex]

Fix up your blog theme it looks shitty.

Recommend me another and I will. 

[physex]

I have just discovered the screenshot system in the ARMA 3 alpha.  It's absolutely stunning.

[physex]

Quote of the Day

“Everyone was expecting us to make Modern Warfare 4, which would have been the safe thing to do," said Infinity Ward executive producer Mark Rubin, "but we're not resting on our laurels. We saw the console transition as the perfect opportunity to start a new chapter for Call of Duty. So we're building a new sub-brand, a new engine, and a lot of new ideas and experiences for our players. We can't wait to share them with our community." WHOA. WHAT A RISKY MOVE. Instead of making another Call of Duty game.. They're making another Call of Duty game!!

via IGN 

[physex]

E3 - Nintendo = ..E2? NeXbox to blame!

Original story at IGN here.

Nintendo have announced they won't be holding a traditional large-scale conference at this year's Electronic Entertainment Expo, instead focusing on its very popular (and very cool) Nintendo Direct service, as well as a few behind-closed-doors affairs at E3 with the press, that I assume will not be streamed.  This news comes very close behind Microsoft's announcement that..they're..going..to announce...something (Gaming biz, am I right?).

I feel that Nintendo might have been contemplating a big display at E3 and this announcement was the nail in the coffin. As the Wii U slowly but surely chugs its way into a better release schedule, and having just announced the new Zelda and Yoshi's Island titles(announced through aforementioned Nintendo Direct), I can't imagine the big N would have much petrol in the tank. Therefore, with Sony and Microsoft cracked and smacked up on their new consoles, Nintendo would surely be left in the dust.  Therefore, my assumption is that this decision doesn't flag the end of big conferences for Nintendo at E3, but just that they're sitting this one out, as they have no material.  What are your thoughts, my delicious, delectable, very sexually attractive followers?  

[ionlyeatsushi-deactivated201403]

I think we will all survive MGS5 without David Hayter.

It will hurt like hell, but think about it. This game is going to be the one canonically before Metal Gear. There’s likely going to be Big Boss’ decline in it. Therefore, a voice change does make a little sense.

[physex]

I'd like to agree with this theory but it's torn apart by the fact that Hayter's Japanese counterpart Akio Otsuka, unlike Hayter, is reprising his role as Snake in MGS:V.

[physex]

Anal?

Check your rectum. The seed has been sowed. Divine insemination.  

[physex]

^ Edit: Title is a link to a petition, by the way. ^ . ^

I don't really believe things like this work but it couldn't hurt! If you haven't heard, Hideo Kojima and Kojima Productions plan to ditch David Hayter as the English voice of Big Boss (and some of his clones). If you're either an idiot or don't play Metal Gear Solid, this is the Solid Snake, one of the most recognisable, beloved, and influential video game characters of all time.   

Hayter has voiced nine titles in the series, and his voice is unmistakable as Snake.  Nobody knows why Hideo Kojima, father of Metal Gear Solid, has made this decision, allegedly not even Hayter himself. Kojima remarked the switch was made to reinvigorate the series with new talent, but the Japanese voice actor that has played Snake since his creation is reprising his role, which makes Kojima's story sound like cruel misdirection.  It's a confusing scenario to be sure, and sadly not an April Fools joke like everyone has hoped.  The upcoming Metal Gear Solid: V just won't be the same without him, and it has seriously cut my excitement, even being a HUGE fan of MGS.  Thanks, guys. Tune in soon for a review of Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance and BioShock:Infinite.

[physex]

Bring us the girl.

Wipe away the debt.

  Full review coming soon..