Young man

There's no need to feel down.

[thebootydiaries]

[pochowek]

[rooflizards]

buddy

[deactivated-blog]

that one ‘’i heart pizza’’ shirt that makes you pull pizzas out of your ass when you dance

[deactivated-blog]

[fancyserviette]

Me today

[goawfma]

the entitlement….i swear only yt people..

[samthor]

you *buy* your flour? you don’t grow your own wheat and mill the grain on your water turbine stone…. thingy? tsk tsk.

[regicide1997]

Nominative determinism

[livepoultryfreshkilled]

one sec i gotta google some shit

[livepoultryfreshkilled]

yeah this is funny

[evilkitten3]

(nominative determinism is the theory that people gravitate towards occupations that fit their names, like how usain bolt is a sprinter)

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

i love how in some countries it’s called aubergine, which is colorful & fancy & french. 

and then elsewhere it’s just. Egg. Plant. The egg plant. The Plant of the Egg.

[marshmallow-fluffy]

You can mail eggplants to people from a couple different websites, if you just do a quick search of “eggplant mail”

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

my favorite thing about posting bullshit on this hellhole is that i get to learn things like this:

[slitherpunk]

*exports you as a jpeg* *and turns the quality waaaaay down*

[devipotato]

[xdead-god-dreamingx]

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

the thing about getting hundreds of asks a day is eventually things line up like this:

thanks tumblr

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

that’s actually their gullet. this may or may not be related to gular fluttering, a process by which birds vibrate their throat muscles to release heat. i’m told the noise it makes is unholy

[softchubbypuppy]

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

About Birds: I worked at a wild bird rescue and quickly learned that you hold pigeon like hamburger, you hold blue jay like criminal and always be nice to the crows, they hold grudges.

the crows know your sins and report back to the crow mafia 

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

Gaudy I love you and your content, and I thank you for coming to my nightmares, but I just get sad when you’re mean to birds. Especially secretary birds who are so lovely :(

secretary birds are the KARENS of the avian world

[yourplayersaidwhat]

My sister, the DM: Ok, you’ve killed the deer. You get four XP. Now what?

Me, a lizard-paladin: So theoretically, since I’m a lizard, could I eat raw meat?

Sister: I do not like where this is going.

Me: Answer the question.

Sister: I guess you could? I don’t know why you’d want to but-

Me: I drag the deer corpse to town square and crouch over it

SIster: what

Me: I eat the deer raw, hissing at anybody who makes eye contact.

sister: what

Brother, also playing: what

[myrosecolouredgirl]

so a fucking 5pm curfew was called in seattle today….. at 4:45pm

and Seattle PD had roadblocks up so people couldn’t get out, so they were forced to violate the curfew.

jenny durkan is a fucking fascist. carmen best is a fucking fascist.

donate to the Black Lives Matter Seattle fund here. i donated $25. match me.

https://blacklivesseattle.org/bail-fund/

[fishcrow]

Spooky fella, creepo crow 

[henstomper]

too many people see evolution as just animals becoming better animals when the truth is that theres a species of boar that evolved to die because its tusks grow into its skull because the males with long tusks fuck the most

[paleo-mammalia]

Yep.

And don’t forget the Irsih elk, which supposedly went extinct because its antlers were too bleeding huge for it to function, and the ladies wouldn’t bang a man if his antlers were not huge enough.

[smeasel]

[thivus]

himbofication of the animal kingdom

[bulbasaur-propaganda]

What the hell is this.. 👀

[bulbasaur-propaganda]

Someone just sent me this.

If you want these figures, please don't buy them from any store. They are actually free downloads. Don't support scammers.

[250m]

Visit Original Link

[alcreamcone]

I loved this part in Death Stranding

[door-maker-gal]

I hate how on Tumblr, a username like lisa486 is almost certainly a pornblot, while someone named solidsnakesasscheeks is almost certainly a real person

[solidsnakesasscheeks]

I could be a porn bot if I wanted to