The brunet was silent as he approached his lover. He wasn't at all angry or upset at Hunk for smoking what he guessed was a cigarette. He gave the other a small smile as he approached, saying, "I woke up and you weren't there. I came to check on you."
Carefully, Lance reached up and used his thumb to caress Hunk's cheek gently, before taking the cigarette gently. He took a long drag off of it himself, before handing it back to his lover. He blew it out towards the cold air, not having had the taste of one in a long time.
"You don't have to explain your coping mechanisms to me," Lance whispered then, "I'm not going to be mad. A little disappointed, sure, but never mad. These could kill you sooner than another war."
A small laugh left his lips at his own poor attempt at a joke. He looked down at the pieces of metal that Hunk was tinkering with, figuring it was the newest model of hologram device for Allura. He didn't look up as he started to speak.
"When Allura sacrificed herself, I was completely devastated," Lance started, feeling that was the best place, "I turned to alcohol first. Would drink until I couldn't feel my own skin, let alone remember how her's felt against mine. But, it could never-ever erase the pain. It wouldn't stop the nightmares or the tears. Before I came back here to the castle, I started meddling in things that I definitely shouldn't have."
Lance paused as he gathered himself, "It started with weed. I've dabbled in it before, but never to the extent that I was then. Then, shrooms. But they only made me hallucinate her. Then, before I knew it, I was in one of the space malls looking for any sort of drug that I could get my hands on to try and forget. It definitely wasn't a proud moment for me."
He finally looked up at Hunk as he said, "But, you know what got me out of it? Coming to join you. Knowing that you were still working on the diplomatic mission Allura left to us. I quit cold turkey that night I contacted you, giving myself some time to get the drugs out of my system. It was hard, but knowing that I could be around you and Coran...it gave me a reason to live. To fight and find healthier ways to cope with the pain. You two, and the other paladins, were my last link to Allura. And I knew that she wouldn't approve of me doing the things I was in order to forget my pain."
"You helped me so much, Hunk, without even realizing it," Lance smiled, wiping away the tears that had formed during his explanation, "So, I get the need to find another out. You definitely look like you haven't slept, and I've noticed before. I just...never thought it was the right time to talk to you about it." He sighed as he said, "I want to help you cope in healthier ways, if I can."
