kissing the loo
(1/3 of my secret santas I’ve done)
apart of cloudytea’s secret santa!! my victim was @pipluppini with her sona and jean loo :P
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@pipluppini
kissing the loo
(1/3 of my secret santas I’ve done)
apart of cloudytea’s secret santa!! my victim was @pipluppini with her sona and jean loo :P
HI UH-- IM SO SORRY YOU WENT TO THE HOSPITAL??? I hope you're okay, dude!! You don't gotta respond to my silly angst thing. I can send in a new one all about Jean Loo actually kinda thriving if you'd like to hear about it! Sorry to bother you in any capacity though--
Sending you the best wishes for your recovery. Please imagine Jean Loo feeding you soup.
- 💤
PLZ DONT APOLOGISE!!! I 100% WILL COZ WHAT U SENT I ABSOLUTELY LOVE AND IK THE OTHR JEAN LOOSERS (affectionate <3) WILL LOVE IT TOO. I am always down for Jean Loo angst hehehe
I’m okay!! Just resting and recovering but i wanna be my best when I respond!! but no need to worry <3 I’m okay and ty to all who sent me wishes i am going to smooch u all on the forehead!! when i am better coz i would not wish this on anyone
but I wouldn’t be opposed to thieving Jean Loo if you’d still like to send that hehehe. <— said by the big ol’ greedy JLP content consumer (me x9)
but the concept of Jean Loo feeding me soup… that’s so… that’s so that’s so—
Thinking abt him taking care of someone who is sick is lowkey funny to me oh my gooosssshhh. Guess we’re all getting some fluffy/domestic thoughts rn yippee!!
Pre!Realization I feel like he acts like it’s the most tedious thing for him. “Stay away from him! He does not need your germs impacting his flow” and honestly he probably doesn’t like dealing with it since he would have to deal with it coz u know… throw up… So in generally, as an object if someone is sick he is staying AWAY!! He is not a happy camper
But
BUT
If you manage to earn his respect and care then I can see him caring just a bit. Like he may stay away for a bit to protect himself and what not but slowly he may miss your presence. Especially considering the upstairs bathroom is right next to the bedroom? He’ll show up one day with tissues and a heated towel “You are milking this illness at this point. Here” a slowly he becomes your disgruntled “nurse” which is really him hovering behind Farya coz he dragged her to look after you.
If you cough/sneeze around him he will pull a face and remind you to either do it on a tissue or in the crook of you arm.
Like he acts annoyed, and is, but deep down he cares. Like he will genuinely feel bad too see you in pain and weak. Maybe something to do with the fact he doesn’t like that for himself and always wants to be seen in top condition but shhh no angst rn.
He masks his care with scoldings and tsk but he’ll always make sure you have water by your bed side and change out face towel when needed. “Get better so we can Crap again” he pouts as he sits at your bedside as you doze off asleep, concern in his eyes as he awaits your recovery. Maybe he’ll even make a rap about you getting better thinking that’ll somehow make u better LOL don’t ask me ask him. He seems pretty convinced it will
Now Post!Realization… that’s the one I can see feeding me soup. Pre!Realization you’d have to whine enough to make do but Post!Realization???
The moment he finds out you’re sick he’s sending out a care package. When he does he is masked up and wearing gloves coz well, he has to first lookout for himself. He doesn’t want to get sick but I like to think he’s more sympathetic just a bit when it comes to medical concerns due to his own issues with medical stuff/health.
He’ll have Farya on the phone as he checks your temps asking her what’s the best course of action/booking you an appointment etc. Wanting to ensure your better
And he makes for a decent cook. It’s not like he always cooks or likes it. Mostly does it just to have the life skill but his chicken noodle soup? It’s not bad. He’d expect you to feed yourself first but if he sees you can’t then perhaps he can be persuaded to feed you. There will be a furrow in his brows when he does (he really doesn’t want to get sick) but the moment you compliment either his cooking or look just a little bit better from the first sip he’ll relax.
A lot of post!realization Jean Loo taking care of you are those quiet moments where you can see him actually be concerned. He becomes very focused and quiet for once as he figures out the best way to help you out all whilst making sure he’s okay too.
He’ll definitely make sure you’re on top of your mediation. Will even call you on his break to make sure you take it.
And this is me being delusional but maybe if you ask him to stay tonight he’ll hesitate. He doesn’t want to get sick! It is best if you rest alone, but when you wake up he’s there. Your head on his chest and his peaceful face there… oughhhoughhhh that’s 100% delusion but let me LIVE
ough he’d also want to make sure you stay in bed. The moment you move he’s rushing you back in, “Are you insane? Stay. He is more than capable of getting you tissues” Okay he may be an annoying caretaker but he cares. Just let him!!!
hnnghhhhhhh jean loo save me jean loo save me
too much french white boy angst times which are totally neither our faults time for silliness
thinking about your jean loo blind date fic again at like the start of chapter 4 when he says the reader is free to brag about banging him
but
can you imagine his reaction when the player is so incredibly genuine with just bragging about him in general especially in a post-realization scenario where they're still together
like "this is my boyfriend he's very smart and cool >:D" type of energy
are they feeding into his already inflated ego? oh yeah absolutely no questions asked but considering his low point in mental health
please just help this man
Reading this was like taking my first sips of water in the middle of a desert GOD TY FOR DOING THE LORDS WORK ANON!!!
It always throws me off guard when ppl reference my fic coz woah 😭 LIKE VERY POS BUT AKFJAKDCKA
COZ STUFF LIKE THIS MAKES ME WISH I PLANNED THAT FIC OUT MORE COZ UGH YESYESYESYES. Confession time! I didn’t really plan that fic ahead aside from the first 3 chapters coz honestly, i came in just wanting to bang sad, post-realisation Jean loo 😭. It wasn’t till someone asked me if the fic was going to have a happy ending did I churn chapters 4/5
I’m so glad ppl like it but I’m always haunted by the fact it could’ve been better coz this? This is stuff I would’ve loved to explore
Jean Loo has an ego yes. Even post!realization I believe he still has one, though much dampened but serving the same purpose. To protect himself. Like u know, he make himself out to be this arrogant jerk coz he has so much self esteem issues that he wants to hide and ignore coz that isn’t cool!!!
Like in the house it’s sort of his crutch to cope with the fact he is a toilet. Coz actually he’s a crapper! His bars are fire and his flow unmatched! But he’s the only person who believes that. Everyone else thinks he’s an idiot, but who cares? They are wrong! He is right! Yet it’s always up to him to hold this up
Then comes being human and he realises that he’s sharing space with 8 billion people. Everyone is gonna judge him and especially if he did pursue a music career? He’s got all these eyes on him that expect the best from him and ofcourse he is the best! He is the best right?! But he failed at this big music career he had based his whole future on.
Oh that absolutely impact his ego, but I believe he’s so used to having to hold himself up for so long that he tries to not let it show. That despite it being such a massive hit on everything he stands by, he still desperate to prove himself somehow. Always proving himself despite everything and especially when majority of the house succeeds? After that any ego he has is moreso to protect what little he has left. It’s more of a desperate feeling
Anon I am so sorry i am straying away from ur ask to talk abt my fic i am so sorry but i swear it’s relevant. I think 😭 please feel free to come in my inbox to stfu. U have my express permission.
But that protectiveness for himself? I wished I got to explore that more coz looking back. I don’t think him and the reader would make up so fast. Or he would even open up so fast. The reader sort of forces it out of him in the fic? But if i wrote it now it would take longer.
The way I wrote Jean Loo, especially with the aftercare and being “sweeter” on the reader post-sex in my mind was written as him again, trying to prove himself. Trying to prove he is worth all this because he doesn’t think he deserves to be treated with kindness. That no, don’t think about the fact I ghosted you for a year, focus on how cool and generous I am! That he would still connect with the reader after their night together. Coming back in their life like it’s nothing coz what he has with the reader is possibly the first good thing he’s got in a long time.
But he’d always be caught on this feeling of having to perform. To be a good guy. Not actual relationship. It would be an insane situationship LMFAO coz he knows he doesn’t deserve this but also needs something to keep himself together. That despite it all, he needs this and would ignore the underlying issue to get it.
So having a reader/somone be genuinely proud of him? That wants to show him off? That’s proud to be with him. I’d still write it that the two talk it out before reaching this point but ultimately what the reader shows is genuine. Because they have missed him.
That he doesn’t need to perform to earn their care and love. That it was always there. He just needed to be there and not fuck off for a year LOL!!!!
And yeah, it’d shock him. Probably scare him coz he feels he doesn’t deserve it if he doesn’t earn it. That the moment it is reciprocated and not a joke he’d be all ??? “wait hold on” But Jean Loo does deserve to be shown off and loved!!!
Had I planned it out, I would’ve explored a more slower-paced unravelling of this emotion and their relationship. Taken more time in developing the reader/Jean Loo’s relationship. More uncovering old feelings as well as exploring new feelings. To have that feeling of “falling in love” again despite the hurt and pain life and separation has caused. To meet this new Jean-Loo and still love him despite how little he sees of himself now.
Again. anon I am so sorry for straying away from your ask to talk abt my would-be fic 😭 I just have a lot of thoughts on Jean-Loo/Player dynamic post!realization that I wanted to share and ur ask kicked that up for me but yes. U r right and we need more fluffy thoughts.
Which u guys r always free to send!!! Coz I love them and would love to explore those too!!!
let’s ignore the fact I’m responding to this first coz the next asks i have are all angst LMFAOOOOO
u guys know who u are.
hi guys another thought
is it abt Jean Loo being miserable? Yes it is im sorry ☹️ one day I’ll have a happy Jean Loo text post… maybe…
TW: Mentions of suicide
So this will be under more
hi!! insane jean loo fan here. happy to have found someone who also thinks deeply about that toilet. allow me to contribute my thoughts.
in my brain, the reason why jean loo stops crapping (cool rapping) is because he kinda realizes people dont take him seriously??? like-- he gets really viral at first, and he kinda rides the high of that fame, but then slowly realizes that nobody actually cares about what he makes and people think he's a fuckin joke. he has those porcelain records and he thought they were given to him because he's just That Good at What He Does, but no. they were given to him as a joke, kind of like people going "hey this guy's super funny, lets give him the award for funniest guy!" when in reality he was never trying to be funny. he gets his passion turned into a joke/meme by the public and it disheartens him so much that he steps away from it entirely and picks up what he thinks is an actual, serious job.
i think hes probably got like. trauma from being a toilet, and he likely used his crapping and humor to cope but never took the time to unpack his deeper issues with how he used to exist. i find it so misery inducing that when he turns human, all his joy and whimsy basically disappears. the idea of the porcelain records being all he has left of his fame and them being basically a joke is so haunting to me because. he still keeps and displays them. thats all he has left of his dream, even if it sucks. he cant just throw it away.
anyway um. er. um. i have very deep thoughts on this guy and he makes me mentally ill. i desperately need more friends to be mentally ill abt him with and uhhh. yeah i hope this finds the other jean loo enjoyers well.
- 💤
HI INSANE JEAN LOO FAN I AM ALSO AN INSANE JEAN LOO FAN AND I HEART THIS <333
I’ve been busy but i’ve been rereading this and it makes me so giddy
Idk if you’ve read my post abt my thoughts on what happened to Jean Loo and how he ended up as an accountant but I have very similar thoughts!!!
I am a bit generous by thinking the porcelain awards were given to him as gifts by fans but then being fake regardless? Yep!! Yep!!
Like they’d just be slap to the faces each and everytime he looks at them but he still holds onto them. He wishes he could rid of them, totally rid of his past but he can’t coz deep down he can’t bring himself to get rid of his past.
He should hate it and when he got realised he wanted nothing more than to get away from it, but now he can’t help but look back on smthing that should be behind him. He was excited to live a new life!!!
Like as a human he has the opportunity to be anything and he ends up as a fucking accountant
and the worst part is that it doesn’t even help him feel good abt himself. Sure it’s impressive he is one and his bank account is happy but he’s the farthest thing from being that.
Happy.
He must be so frustrated with himself. That no matter what he does nothing works. That either he’s a joke pursing what he loves or he’s completely miserable pursuing something that he couldn’t give a damn about.
I like to think that he does listen to his old music. It must hurt to listen to them but he knows that there was depth to it. Has to believe that everyone was wrong or he really does have nothing left. In turn I think this also means that he still writes lyrics or makes sample beats but he never publishes it. It’s less frequent too but he still does them when he gets the inspo but he can’t bring himself to make a proper track. Now suddenly afraid of what everyone thinks when he couldn’t care less before hand.
I don’t even think he’d spend his money either. Like it’s all in his savings coz he doesn’t have that spark in him to spend it other than what he needs + booze/substances. Just imagine smthing catching his eye and he knows he has the funds to spend it but he doesn’t and just walks away. Smthing smthing that he doesn’t buy it coz he knows that it won’t be enough to fill the emptiness he fells so what’s the point?
Man he probably has a storage garage somewhere with all his old stuff is… An effort to forgot but not ever get rid of. Like sometimes he’ll deal with the cold and pretend he’s creating music again only to leave and lock it all away when he’s done.
Except his awards. It’s the only thing that he’ll allow himself to keep out even if it hurts. He just needs smthing u know?
Your initial Tumblr post about Jean Loo getting hurt has just been living rent-free in my head and then I remembered something about how he imagined his new life would be like
What if he almost died from a drive-by? He's talked about his hypothetical death as a rapper who'll forever go down in history, but what if he managed to piss off the wrong person and they attempted to actually kill him? Imagine how shaken up he'd be after that because he's human now. He can get hurt. He can die.
And maybe that's what stops his rapping career. Jean Loo may have survived, but something in him died that day.
God I love Jean Loo fans coz I can make a text post talking abt my thoughts on him getting beat up and instead of getting jumped I get this
and this? this is so freaking good and you’re right coz oh my god!!!
the way he says it so freely beforehand because he has no idea what it’s like to be shot, to nearly die. That the mere concept of him dying out like that is so perfectly dramatic for a guy like him coz he deserves that type of attention
And the fact it’s a Tupac references makes me believe he has the idea because he read it off a Magazine the homeowner left behind. Like how some ppl have a reading nook/stash in their bathrooms, or read on their phones??? Doomscrolling?
That he based his whole expectations of his future on someone elses. Dramatizing their own death and imposing it on his fantasies and then for it to become his reality??? And is forced to realise that reality is harsh and he can no longer hide behind his own naivety.
And the thing is he probably didn’t even 100% mean it when he tells us his supposed future and his death!!! Like he literally ripped it from someone else. He just wanted to sound cool!!! and then boom!!
And imagine it leaves a scar. And it’s not a pretty one either.
This it isn’t enough that he hangs his porcelain awards in his cubicle. Or that his music occasionally plays on the radio or trends on some social media platform. No, he has a permanent reminder of the part of himself he lost right up against his skin that he can’t get ever get rid off or can simply ignore and will carry with him for the rest of his days.
And what if the MC and the other objects reach out to him??? Coz surely such an incident wouldn't be publicised too the world. There's no way his former housemates won't know and reach out to him showing their concern and sympathies.
And he should be grateful but their care only serves to remind him how fucked he is. That everyone else gets to live these successful lives and he gets fucking shot.
Since the game didn't make him the successful soundcloud rapper he was MEANT to be. l've instead coped with him having semi-success before going utterly downhill which ive discussed here so him getting shot would just be the final straw.
Would he hate himself for choosing the cowardly option? Yes. Absolutely. But everything he finds himself beating himself over it he just goes to touch his scar to remind himself of why he did it.
Except it doesn't really help him feel better about the choice he made.
You’ve talked about how Jean Loo is after he gets into fights, and how he’s a lot more shaken up post-realization… How do you think he’ll react if MC were to be the one thats beaten up whether infront of him or the he sees the aftermarh,, (AND IF IT WAS FOR JEAN LOO 😭😭😭 like they take the punch for him/defend him and had to get involved💔💔💔)
꩜
omg anon ur so smart hoooolllyyy shit
I assume this is moreso for his post!realisation so I’ll talk about that too but it’s Jean Loo so I’m including his pre!realisation reaction as well HAHAHA
Did i get carried away with this? Yes. Absolutely but shhhhh let me have this.
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── .✦ Jean Loo x GN!reader
Summary: Jean Loo watches you take a hit for him. Includes both Pre and Post realisation reactions.
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Pre Realisation
— Jean Loo is used to getting hit. Okay, maybe not hit always? but he is aware he can be a shit head and so when he sees a fist coming his way he just accepts his fate. “Ah merde, here we go again”
— So he doesn’t expect you, the homeowner, to intervene
— Shocked is an understatement. “You *idiote*” he yells at you, a hand on your shoulder keeping you steady and is that a flash of concern on his face or did they hit your eye really hard?
— Regardless it only last a second before he’s on the move
— Because of the nature of the house, I assume Jean Loo would be held back from hitting whoever hit you back (assuming it’s one of the other objects) and maybe he does get a hit in before he’s held back
— But regardless, he’s yelling profanities after profanities
— And they’re all in French. He’s so mad he can’t even think straight to speak English and it probably frustrates him more when ppl can’t understand him
— “Espèce d'abruti, tu ne sais pas frapper droit?” “Quoi ? Tu ne comprends pas onu tu as besoin d'une autre chance pour y arriver, idiot?!”
— He’s all red in the face by the time you can collect yourself and get his attention, “Jean Loo it’s okay, I’m ok—“ “Okay? You are *not* okay”
— And suddenly his attention is on you again “Eat shit asshole” he tells them one last time before he looks at you that look again. Concern, and maybe something else?”
— “bon sang…Let’s go” and he has his arm around your shoulder, keeping you close to him and guiding you downstairs and he’s surprisingly quiet muttering to himself
— “what are you saying?” “huh?” “you’re saying smthing” “he is not saying anything. Shut up”
— Then your downstairs and he burst into the bathroom “FARYA” “Coming— oh”
— He has you sitting on the toilet instantly and yammering to Farya, “Stupid got hit go fix them—“ “Well ofcourse! The doctor is on it”
— Unfortunately he can’t stop hovering over her shoulder as Farya examines you
— “Oh! Jean Loo can you get me ice from Freddy it’s too reduce the swe—“ “Oui”
— It’s to get him out of there do Farya can actually work on you but the speed he leaves to get on his pseudo-mission is alarming
— “Wow, he didn’t even argue with me”
— When he comes back he returns to hovering. The whole time he has the deepest frown on his face
— He *insists* he help you up to his room, “And what will happen if you trip and hit your head on the stairs” “Jean Loo I’ve walked up these stairs a million—“ “And you want hitting your head on them to one of those times? Non!”
— Even when he does get you back to your bedroom he still hasn’t left. That pout still on his lips
— Like even when the bathroom is right there he’s just hovering at the foot of your bed, pacing, arms crossed over his chest and his eyebrows furrowed
— “…do you want water?” “What?” “He said, do you want water. What did you get hit in the ear too?”
— He’s being insulting but it’s so obvious there’s no heat in his words. Not in the way he looks at you with such an obvious look of guilt and sadness in his eyes, that he just keeps looking at your bandaged up wound
— “Jean Loo seriously, I’m fi—“ “Don’t ever do that again”
— Will he ever let you finish a full sentence?
— “Promise him that you will never do something so stupid again” “…well I mean that depends if you plan on rage—“ “He is serious!”
— And you will bicker with him until you finally give him that “yes” coz he will refuse to leave until he gets it no matter how late is already is
— You don’t realise you even fell asleep until your awoken by a wad of paper on your chest and Jean Loo’s smug face appearing in your view
— “Well go on, read it. You only got hit in one eye there is no excuse to not read his excellency”
— Yeah, he wrote a whole diss track against the other person just for you
— “Jean Loo you are going to get hit for this” “They have it coming!” “Jean Loo no—“
— Anyways
— He will be stuck to you like glue for the next few days. Don’t even dare enter the bathroom unless you want to be shoved to Farya by him with him hovering
— And if he notices you bleeding just a bit? He will rip a tear of TP from his wrist to dab it up “You need to go to Farya right now” “It’s fine—“ “Non”
— And maybe a week later after the whole incident you’re hanging out together again. Laughing and crapping
— Then there’s a quiet moment and you catch him looking at your healing bruise. The smallest pout on his lips
— “…Je suis désolé” “Hmm what was that?” “He said he’s sorry you’re an idiot”
— Tho next time he decides to rile someone up he makes sure you’re not around LOL
꩜
Post-Realization
— When you take the hit from him now, oh it’s much different
— There’s none of your friends to help you or him so he has no choice but to step in. But again, he’s shocked
— He’s trying hard to stay focus. He’s trained for this, was more than ready to take the hit but you saw him tense up, the unfamiliar fear in his eyes that pushed you to step in for him.
— He’s mostly dodging/blocking attacks rather than throwing them. The one time he does get hit is because he turned to look at you for a second, just to make sure you’re okay, which was enough for his opponents to land one on him. Right against his jaw
— And without his porcelain durability it hurts waaaay more than it did back in the house
— And if I say rather than focus on the stinging on his jaw that he instead focuses on your pain? That if is what he’s feeling then you have to be just in much pain
— It isn’t like he gains super strength or anything, but a mixture of guilt and frustration gives him enough willpower, despite his previous hesitancy, to throw one more punch despite how ill advised it is
— He’s not stupid to continue after that. Jaw and knuckles sore he turns to you, “Let’s go” not without throwing a nasty glare to your opposition as you somehow manage to get away.
— He’ll refuse to go to the doctors/emergency room “Nononon, he has a first aid kit back at home” “but—“ “you must’ve hit your head and not heard him. No doctors”
— The car ride to his place is tense. He’s gripping the car wheel too tight and you have to remind him not to speed, “He can afford a fine” “Jean Loo no”
— He’s not saying much. Letting the radio do it things but you occasionally catch eachother’s eye. Whether it be from the sides or the mirror.
— Everytime you do you can see the guilt in his face and how blatant it is, as well as his own bruises forming
— “You okay?” “…Yeah, he will be”
— There’s both a sense of urgency and care when he brings you from his car to his place. Wrapping his arm around your shoulder, wincing when you bump into him and frowning when you pause, but he catches himself. Pauses when he sees you flinch at your own pain and rubs a comforting hand on your arm when he notices.
— He makes no show of you in his apartment when you finally arrive, guiding you to his coach and handing you a bottle of water, “Just wait here” all whilst he’s still messed up himself.
— There’s not much care to himself. Only wetting a wash cloth and using it clean up the dried up blood before taking care of you
— “You took more hits than me. You should really—“ “Let me focus”
— Despite having mellowed out since the house, even you’re unsure if you’ve seen him so focused in the way he’s caring for you
— It’s almost embarrassing how intense his gaze is as he looks over your injuries
— But despite his eyes, his touch doesn’t match. When he goes to lift his hand to move your face so he can get a better angle of your injury his touch is barely there. Acting as if you’re fragile, like he isn’t allowed to touch and only giving himself the faintest of chances of doing so.
— Regardless, his work on you is clean and effective. He wasn’t lying. He really does know first aid and it’s evident. Your pain is still there but the bandages he’s used to help makes it feel better than before
— And then you realise how close he got to help you out. That despite him touching you, barely, this whole time somehow looking him eye to eye feels a lot more intimate
— Ofc the moment is ruined when you remember that he’s still injured himself
— “Oh shit you’re still hurt” “Ah—“ “Let me help—“
— But when you go to touch him he flinches. Moves back and his cool mask slips into a second of fear and it feels bad
— He hesitates. Looking at you then the first aid kit but then when you try again, placing your hand gently in his to pull him back down he doesn’t stop you
— You can feel the tremble in his hand when you hold him against you, pulling him closer so you can mimic his earlier movements. Holding back too say smthing when you see that his whole body is trembling and how he’s holding his breath everytime you apply rubbing alcohol on his wounds
— “Merde, that hurts” “I know, I’m sorry, it’ll only be for—” “Non, d-don’t apologise”
— With him being the patient now there’s no excuse for him to not focus on the entirety of the situation. And you can feel the way the guilt is eating at him. He won’t even look at you in the eye despite being so close. Always looking down or elsewhere
— “I wanted too you know?” “What?” “To take the hit. I’m still sturdy myself you know?”
— You lean down to meet his face, try to give him that reassuring smile. Squeeze his hand and he has no choice but to look at you momentarily, a blush creeping on his face before scoffing
— “There is nothing sturdy about the bandages on your head”
— But he relaxes after that. Still doesn’t quite meet your eye but he relaxes just a bit as you do your final touch ups
— If you drink or smoke he’ll offer one to you afterwards. If not he’ll do it himself, going closer to his window too look out as the city as you two sit in a comfortable silence, letting your body’s relax
— “He can handle himself you know?” He whispers, breaking the silence and he glances at you, capturing your gaze, “He is not a coward”
— “Neither am I” You don’t hesitate to tell him and he doesn’t look away
— “…I know you aren’t” First person pronouns!!! I to show that *he* knows you aren’t “But he still does not want to see you get hurt”
— Because now that he’s human he understands what type of pain you face now. That he’s only experienced this pain for a small percentage of his new human life and it scares him, but this has always been your reality
— Even now it’s hard for him to understand why you took this hit for him when it hurts him so much. Why would you get hurt for him? A failure? Yet you do so with a smile. Caring for him
— He doesn’t understand but you give him no choice with your care and kindness
— So he insists you stay the night. “Who will call the ambulance if you pass out?” “Dude, you took more hits than I did. I’ll be fine” “…He still insist you stay here”
— He even makes you take his bed and he takes his couch. He stubbornly sits himself on the couch, refusing to move if you try to resist his offer, “His house, his rules” >:(
— In the morning he again insist he drives you home, but not without taking a detour to your nearest pharmacy to get you medical supplies and lecturing you about how to use each one
— Even if you do know he’ll still say it. “You are not above learning new things”
— You leave with a bag full of medical supplies and a satisfied Jean Loo
— When he drops you home he walks you to your door and he even lingers a bit, coming in and you two chat like nothing happens. Tho he still makes glances at your bandages and even occasional brushing his hand against your bandages tutting
— After that he texts you each day to check up on you. Demanding pictures to see how your wounds are healing. You make him do the same much to his dismay. Bickering and facetiming eachother during your respective lunch breaks
— He’s more cautious when you two hang out after wards. Holding his tounge when he wants to insult someone. Looking around to make sure there are no angry clients around you both
— He really meant it when he said he doesn’t want to see you hurt. Doesn’t want to be the cause of your pain
— It would take a lot of reassurance afterwards to help him ease up. Even after weeks he’ll feel guilty even if it was your choice but despite what he says and feels, he appreciates the gesture more than he wants to let on
— And maybe, maybe it helps him feel a bit less scared about being human. That one day he can be like you. Take the pain that comes with being a real person and he can live with that.
꩜
Was working on writing up a HC post/asks when I thought of this and I couldn’t resist sharing hehe
But hc that Jean Loo hates going to the doctors/hospitals/any medical practice because he’s terrified that any examination done on him will somehow expose the fact that he was once a toilet.
That somehow if people were to find out that he was one a literal toilet that it somehow explains all the mistake he’s made. That yeah it makes sense that this guy can’t keep his own music career alive and is stuck being a pencil pusher coz he’s meant to be a toilet, duh!!!
He’s a fraud because he’s a toilet!! He’s not meant to exist like this but he chose to exist like this and now he has to face the consequences of it!!!
Like other than the other dateables, who he most definitely ghosted alongside the Homeowner, who can he share these thoughts and worries too?? He’s either going to get laughed or sent to the loony-bin.
Hence another reason why he doesn’t like getting hurt. He probably taught himself first aid too avoid going as much as possible and is very strict with his health, more specifically in the beginning of his accountant days where he was alone with him and his thoughts. Probably the type to take vitamins and supplements in hopes of maintaining his human body himself
He’ll suffer tissue up his nose and snot running down on it before he even considers taking a trip to the doctors…
Probably the only consultations he’ll accept is from Farya or Hank 3. Those 2 are on his special “Call only if I’m fucking dying” list and refuses to speak to anyone else otherwise
go my hanks !
(2)
Re-reading the fic, and I’m STILL not over chapter 3 with Jean Loo FOLDING and being distressed once MC started to sob, the fact he wants to just hold and comfort us knowing he was the one to get us to cry,, UGHHHH When he started apologizing in French???? This has got to be one of the most Earth shattering fic that has changed the trajectory of my life THANK YOUUUU
JSCKANDWN MORE MESSAGES /POS
UR SO SWEET TYSM 😭😭
but erhm ill yap with u then HAHAH time to discuss some Jean Loo HCs 😈
Ahem.
JEAN LOO IS SECRETLY A SOFTIE!! SPREAD THE WORD!!!
Has this been said? Idk BUT—
truth moment, but I was lowkey worried that scene with him folding to be comforting was ooc BUT HEAR ME OUT
One day I’ll properly write down my romantic HCs for him (i’ve tried but he’s soooooo #ineedtokillhim 🤕) but I do think he’s a softie, secretly atleast.
I feel he’s more private with his care and affection. Like he’ll surely show his partner off and be all “my partner is better than yours” hyping you and him up but behind closed doors he’s more gentler. Still playful but so pouty and his stupid forehead blush is very much there 24/7 fjsjakal. Like he wants ppl to see him a this big, tough cool guy but with you it’s okay if you see him as a little sweet. He wants to be sweet and can. Just for you tho so shhh
I think he wants sweetness or atleast someone to see him. Why he tries to educate the player abt rapping and is open to giving another chance like what
And I also feel he’s an acts of service type of guy. Ironically, in an emotional setting he’d be bad with words but he’s observant and perhaps tries to communicate what he struggles to say with his actions!!!
Hence why he also hides his feelings behind his language. It was funny to see how many ppl liked that bit but me too—
Wanting to say smthing but too afraid to say it. Too want to communicate but unsure how. Ugh…
So yeah, canonically, he has little to no experience and he doesn’t want to mess up
And in the context of the fic—
He knows he messed up and wants to fix that. He’s made so many mistakes and he doesn’t want this to be one of them. Probably for us yes, but his own pride too. Like I feel even the sweet aftercare is a bit ooc (I do think he’d do some but not to that extent) but it’s his way of making things up. Trying to show that he is good despite ghosting for a year
So when he’s confronted by his mistakes he folds. Doesn’t matter that he literally tells the reader to stfu on the car ride just before, they’re crying rn and it’s his fault. He’s just a scared of us rejecting him/seeing him as a failure just as much as we are scared of him leaving again
(Do I think he would’ve left if the reader hadn’t intervened? Yes. BUT it would kill him a lot and there’d be a lot of turmoil. Maybe he comes back later in distress. A drunken voicemail apologizing. smthingsmthing avoidant!Jean Loo. I like drama okay.)
Which translates to their hangout.
Not a date but it’s something more than what a year apart has given them.
I just think I just wanted the ending to be a sense of hope
AGAIN!! I know I wrote this but I also do think it would maybe take longer for him to open up again, but ya know with the spur of the moment situation suddenly thrust at them it probably, maybe(?) sped up the process but for me
I mostly made it open ending (on a positive note) coz it’s still messy. Everything is but they can hang out again and it’s okay. They’re okay and willing to try and that’s good and worth it. Whether that is romantic or platonic later down the line is up to the reader coz for me, Jean Loo is the type of guy who would take awhile to enter a relationship, even if stuff like the fic happens to him. Especially after his realization. Would need a lot of time to be secure in his life so point B to C is up to interpretation!!! But defo better than his actual ending HAHAHA
fuck he gives me so many brain worms and i want to write so much more about him and who he is + explore the homeowners relationship with him and just — i need to squeeze him BLAAAHH
AND UGH I PROBABLY REITERATED STUFF THATS WRITTEN IN THE FIC AND JUST YAPPED AGAIN BUT WHATEVER
if u guys r nice to me i’ll fold and share all my secret author/writing thoughts/hj
AGAIN TYSM FOR BEING A SWEETHEART AND IM SORRY FOR USING UR WONDERFUL ASK TO RAMBLE THANK U AGAIN!!
Hiyloo, I just finished reading your 5 chapter Jean Loo fic on Ao3 and…
It is the most beautiful piece of both an in-depth characterization of Post-realization Jean Loo with vulnerable moments with MC. I love how it shows how their communication throughout the thing isn’t primarily one-and-done nor smoothly making up over sex. I like how you make the reader rightfully angry at Jean Loo, and as well how you draw out the emotions of pent-up guilt, anger, and sadness from Jean and how he shields his feelings in his native tongue.
I have been SCROUNGING around tumblr and ao3 for Post-realization Jean Loo x Reader that showcases the more vulnerable side of both of them— especially with Jean Loo having PLENTY of angst, comfort and anything messy because of his canon ending. I literally had to hold my breath during that arguing scene of MC taking his car keys, where they don’t spill out a lot but it was enough for both Jean Loo and us the reader to already know what MC wants to say. The way you write words throughout the scenes and as well as the dialogue feeling so naturally flowing is so beautiful, and I even got a few laughs at MC repeating “C'est pas faux” horribly pronounced 🥹
All in all, your writing is like biting into a plentiful sandwich of every meat, cheese and lettuce in it, yet every bite I still am hungry for. I want to hold your fics and insert them into my brain to play them as my bed time story. Please don’t go bald, monarch 🥰
The way i’ve been caught off in the best way possible ????? hello 🥹🥹🥹???
This was such a sweet treat to wake up to and I’ve literally been rereading this message over and over my entire morning. Thank you so much for this 😭
I don’t think anything I’ll say will capture how much this message means to me but know it does and i’m glad you liked my fic
i’ll be so honest. When i first started the fic i came in knowing that I was writing coz i wanted to bang sad!post-realization jean loo LMFAO then someone asked me if the fic was going to have a happy ending and it veered in that direction. Honestly even the first three chapters (the chapters i had in mind from the start) came out longer than I expected but seeing ur response + others i’m glad i did make it longer in the end.
i absolutely lovelovelove loved exploring a vulnerable side to Jean Loo + the homeowner’s/our relationship with him post-realization. I always think it’s messy but emotional and he’s just such an interesting character to that i adore so much and explore further. Like it does suck in canon that he ghosts but frankly he makes fic writing abt him way more interesting. Also im really glad you liked the dialogue coz i enjoyed writing them a lot!!
and whilst I feel I could’ve done this fic way better I think I managed to get my general thoughts aside but i deffo have more fics planned to continue my exploration of Jean Loo >:) including a multific but ough planning it out is the bane of my existence. For now i’m praying that one shots will suffice for now
Again I’ve rambled but tysm OP for your lovely message 🥹
A Crap Apology
When I went to think about a quick xReader one shot I could do with Jean Loo, my mind immediately went to an argument
Take that for what you will!
Not my best, but I wanted to make sure I got this out before I entangled it up in more over-thinking
NO THINK, ONLY WRITE!
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"Hey-- you in here?" Jean Loo poked his head in through the bathroom door to find you sitting on your bed, face in your phone.
Do you have an ao3 acc?? Ur writing makes me cry/pos… i wanna comfort jlp so bad
Yes i do!! here u go :D!!
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
but erm,,,
//coughs at 2/3 of my ao3 fics being angst rn 🤕
I prommy I’ll write more stuff that’s comfort leaning 😭 I have a lot of ideas for jlp just not enough time unfortunately 😔 but I wanna contribute to this jlp drought so bad so hopefully i can get smthing out soon
also wondering if it’s worth cross posting my stuff onto tumblr hmm much to think abt
dumbass hc/ramble time coz i crave jlp content but rn thats visions of him getting his ass beat and how he deals with that 😭
more under read more coz this is sooooo 🤕 i swear I’ll deliver normal jlp content soon…
TW: A lot of mentions and descriptions of blood and violence 😭🤕
so who would still fw me if I made an x / reader fic inspired by this 🤕
idk the reader and jean loo getting into an actual, physical fight and we kick his ass + the aftermath + uhh helping patch him up as a sort of apology and it’s a heart to heart fic 😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔
dumbass hc/ramble time coz i crave jlp content but rn thats visions of him getting his ass beat and how he deals with that 😭
more under read more coz this is sooooo 🤕 i swear I’ll deliver normal jlp content soon…
TW: A lot of mentions and descriptions of blood and violence 😭🤕
so... university Jean Loo? anyone?
+sketch and rant !!
BATHSHEBA x KATSEYE
Was honestly meant to be a rough piece but I knew better than to give my queen Bathsheba more than that 🙂↕️
Had a really fun time doing this and proud of how the colouring turned out!!! Tho u can see some parts i assed but shh
Also wanna make it a goal to draw all the bathroom characters hehehe