Ashmom🏳️‍⚧️

She/Her - 21 - documenting my transition & reblogging nerd shit

[vvivecc]

my partner does bookbinding as a hobby, and I asked him to bind the 36 Lessons into a tome for me to have, just for fun and also as a cool way to reference them for my writing. I think it came out amazing!

[missstrogen]

I genuinely think that calling transfem shitposts "kink posts" is sexual harassment. It's arguing that the only way we can exist is sexual, that all jokes we make must be secretly perverted.

[clericfemme]

[captainsblogsupplemental]

[obi-waankenobi]

#i like to think data took him all the way to the brig tossed him in and left#and then came back 60 seconds later and was like ‘i believe i have successfully played a ‘practical joke’ on you :)’#riker loses it & claps him on the back like ‘wow. good job u rly had me going. dont ever fucking do that again’ Perfect.

[ingridverse]

Actually it’s 73 seconds. Data, knowing something of how human minds work, estimates that Riker will give him 60 seconds to come back (because humans prefer “round numbers”, however arbitrary the units). After 60 seconds it will take 4 seconds for Riker to fully process the conclusion that Data is, in fact, not coming back after all, and an additional 9 seconds to build to the optimum level of anxiety. 

After all, comedy is timing.

[sniperct]

[trekheritageposts]

star trek heritage post (July 19th, 2019)

[pla5tique92]

[post-maester]

I think I should get into snuffbait kink stuff because what if I kms and nobody gets any sexual gratification out of it? Wouldn't that be such a waste?????

[lycowarrior]

An unpleasant meeting with the Ordo Hereticus

Later, the inquisitor managed to build trust between him and the black templars, by showing his loyalty, and rage like a real servant of the emperor would. However, for now, the angels are frustrated when they see the palace, and the level of indulgence these imperial officials are living.

[calyxblogging]

WH40k "Final Liberation" starts to become truly epic towards the later missions, it lives up to the name.

Several titans and a Shadowsowrd as a casual amount of units, Space Marines merely as support infantry.

I also have to say that it aged surprisingly well! I just played it 1 or 2 years ago for the first time. Even the seemingly chaotic gui at the bottom right becomes VERY easy to navigate and use after playing the tutorial (you don't even have to read the manual imo, but it helps), and if you get into it, it's a rather engaging (and often unforgiving) turn based strategy game. I get why it became a classic.

[cindyaquiart]

My rendition of Raven/621 and their Ayre. Mech Raziel to build from his colors.

(I love Cybergoths and Blame! So that was my inspo here hehe. Just a bit of this and that.)

[post-maester]

I bought my first 2 bras today 😎😎 all by myself!!!! Ive only tried one on so far but I like it so much!!! I'm sure this enjoyment will end at some point. All my femme friends say they haven't worn bras like their entire adult lives. So I'm sure they won't spark joy forever. But for now they do!

[post-maester]

I came out to my brother tonight. It went fucking lovely. He was like "oh cool" and we talked about it for an hour while building the new Dungeons & Dragons Lego minifigs. I told him about my meds, how long I've been transitioning, who knows about it, etc. Lots of stuff. I almost started crying a few times, he was so fuckin sweet. "I'll love you no matter what. You can always come to me with things you need to talk about" stuff like that. It was perfect. I'm so glad I did it.

Next up - Mom and Dad.

Time to have a small cry and then sleep cause it's 4am. Night night friends

[post-maester]

Haven't updated the transition timeline in quite a while. No huge changes or anything really. Nothing that screams at me to write. So let's update some small things I guess.

My tits are way bigger than they used to be! Like it's hard for me to boymode! Significantly harder!

I wore a "bra" for the first time and it felt great. A purple strappy lingerie piece I put on for my husband. First time wearing feminine under-wear that made me feel euphoric. I wore it again to a friend's place just to see how it'd feel and I tell you what that shit was uncomfy and I was happy to take it off despite how euphoric it made me.

I've been keeping my nails painted pretty regularly. I like blue. Pink or feminine colours make me panic and feel dysphoric, reason as of yet unknown.

Similarly, my hand/nail dysphoria has pushed me to continue growing my nails. They're getting long enough that I can probably cut them to shape and start taking care of them nicely. My husband LOVES how well I scritch and scratch every inch of him now. Though he wants me to shorten two in particular...

I'm gonna move in with my husband soon. Very excited!

He took me to a "fill-a-bag" event at a thrift shop today, we got a few new skirts, a purse, a wallet, two dresses, n some other stuff! Very excited.

I've never worn a dress before. For some reason they make me uneasy. Maybe because so many of them are shoulderless. My shoulders are wide and not something I wanna draw attention to. Idk. Whatever.

I havent come out to anybody new yet. Fucking annoying. I really wanted to before Christmas. But. Idk how. I'm struggling really hard to do it. It's such a good time. I need to.

I've found a cute hairstyle I like. It's literally just a ponytail tied at my neck. It let's loose hairs fall and frame my face. I like it when they do that. Makes me look like a disheveled mom if I let it go unkept for too long. But I enjoy looking like a mom.

Next appointment is in February. A ways away. It'll be 6 months on hrt. Fuckin crazy. I hope I get to up my dose. I love being like this. Sometimes makes me a lil crazy but it's okay because I have a human that loves me and understands. Very excited that we are transitioning together. He's the best.

Anyways. Night night friends.

[gh0sthoodie]

Happy pride month maybe I’ll start watching Doctor Who again

[post-maester]

I had a really poor depressing moment the other day. I was in such a poor state that for the first time in my life I decided, while sober, that I need to get drunk and high to deal with what I was feeling. My friends passed me while I was on the way to get some drinks at the convenience store. They saw me, for the first time in a really long time, dressed like a boy. And a really gross, depressed, visibly distraught boy.

It was kind of humiliating for me. I put so much effort into my appearance for them, but I didn't have the energy to do it that day and they just happened to see me at the lowest I have been in a very long time. It feels so embarassing. I'm gonna see them tomorrow. I just fuckin know I'm gonna spend at least an hour and a half stressing about my look for the event we're going to. I feel so humiliated.

[pocketss]

leave your laundry on the floor for them

[post-maester]

When I started my transfeminine adventure I was mostly happy with how I dressed, I didn't care. I enjoyed dressing like Adam Sandler every day. Now I stress about outfits for hours before going out, and wearing my old clothes makes me sick to my stomach.

When I started my transfeminine adventure I enjoyed the way my hands looked. I enjoyed that they are scarred and covered in lines like utterly shattered glass. Now I'm exceedingly jealous of online hand models.

When I started my transfeminine adventure I didn't think about my skin, but now I worry about developing a habit of a skincare routine.

When I started my transfeminine adventure I enjoyed going out in public wearing my trans pride pin, but now I'm increasingly aware of the unwelcome stares I get - more than I've ever got in my life.

When I started my transfeminine adventure I wasn't so afraid.

[post-maester]

I've had to boymode a few times in public lately. Fucking hate it. I've felt so safe being myself in my home town for the last few months but now if I wanna go outside in Toronto I need to boymode if want to feel even kind of safe. It makes me feel so gross and angry. Even putting on my tall boots and my trans pin make people look at me weird here. I fucking hate it.