have courage and be kind

[rohirric-hunter]

"You could get up early and do it before work" I could also wait for a magic beanstalk to start growing in my living room LMAO. Let's focus on things that happen in the real world

[probuccalfat]

girl the pattern you see is not divine or malevolent forces trying to reach you through the veil it’s just because you’re good at pattern recognition keep it moving

[butch--dan]

once these 15 million different stressful situations resolve themselves I’m gonna be so normal again. I can be normal and not exhausted

[noodles-07]

"it's all in your head" correct! unfortunately I am also in there

[coldandparanoid]

the girls that get it, get it

[mrstinkerpooper]

we do be going in circles

[wholeheartedsuggestions]

it’s okay to mourn lives you will never get to live even if you’re grateful for the life you are living now

[papercook1e]

Whoever wrote this, slayed so hard with all these statements, truer words have never been spoken

[lesbinewren]

[kragehund-est]

advertisement should be illegal. this is based in the 3rd pillar of my belief system: leave me the fuck alone

[ohcorny]

it really is crazy how quickly people were willing to just let chatgpt do everything for them. i have never even tried it. brother i don't even know if it's just a website you go to or what. i do not know where chatgpt actually lives, because i can decide my own grocery list.

[foolhearteyes]

Oh, okay. I see. You think this has nothing to do with you. You go to your closet and you select out, oh I don’t know, that gaslight gatekeep girlboss meme, for instance, because you’re trying to tell the world that you think modern feminism has been co-opted by corporations. But what you don’t know is that that meme is not from Instagram, it's not from Twitter, it's not from Tiktok, it’s actually from Tumblr. You’re also blithely unaware of the fact that in January 2021, Tumblr user missnumber1111 posted, "today's agenda: gaslight gatekeep and most importantly girlboss." And then I think it was a-m-e-t-h-y-s-t-r-o-s-e, wasn’t it, who reblogged it with an image of the phrase edited over a piece of "Live, Laugh, Love" wall art? And then gaslight gatekeep girlboss showed up in the feeds of eight different Twitter repost accounts. Then it filtered down through Instagram and then trickled on down into some tragic “alt side of Tiktok” where you, no doubt, fished it out of some clearance bin. However, that meme represents millions of notes and countless Tumblr users and so it’s sort of comical how you think that you’ve made a choice that exempts you from Tumblr when, in fact, you’re wearing the meme that was selected for you by the people in this room. From a pile of “stuff.”

[wholeheartedsuggestions]

don’t make yourself smaller and quieter to make others comfortable

[kosmogrl]

[teathattast]

[audliminal]

Me meeting a genie: Okay, so my first wish is for 1000 dollars a day, deposited to my bank account without any way of tracing it to anything illegal. I want this money to come from the ten richest people in America (100 dollars each), withdrawn under the guise of nebulous, random purchases and surcharges. It would probably be best to split the money into a myriad of smaller fees, though, to reduce the likelihood of anyone noticing. Got all that?

Genie: um

Me, continuing on without a care: For my SECOND wish, I want you to give me the ability to learn any given phoneme, so that I can learn to pronounce new languages perfectly. If you're willing, it'd be nice if it were a little easier to memorize new languages too, but if that's not cool, I'm perfectly fine doing all the legwork myself I mostly just want to be capable of pronouncing things correctly.

Genie, now staring at me like I'm insane: ......okaaayyy?....

Me: For my third wish. I want to always have great ideas for gifts for people. Every birthday, every holiday, I want to be able to come up with something they'd really like, with enough time to actually get it for them.

Genie, just staring at me

Me: I can provide you with a written document if that would help.

[beautifulscreaminglady]

people like op are the ones that get memorialized in folk tales for outwitting the devil

[tlirsgender]

Having your main anxiety response be Avoidance is crazy cause you'll think you're chillin and then one day you're like waitttt I've been paralyzed with fear this whole time. Damn

[papayajuan2019]

sometimes that sad feeling is due to low blood sugar, and sometimes it's from decades of history. not that complex