cooter scooter

vere ☆ 25 ☆ they/she ☆ queer ☆ smelly

[finns-gifs]

[gambitgambino]

woe Carnivàle Lecroux gang be upon yee

[sleepyspoonie]

when you see a tumblr poll with this picture attached and you know it's time to lock the fuck in lest you get a bad grade in an impromptu absurdist pop quiz you didn't know you were about to take

[charl0ttan]

best multiple of nine

9

18

27

36

45

54

63

72

81

90

Voting ended onMay 28

[skelerangart]

Savior

[vrabia]

ambitious indie project this, surprise box-office hit that, iron lung (production budget: $3mil) is the 'someone who is good at the economy please help me budget this, my family is dying' tweet.

[vrabia]

set construction: $800

cast & crew wages: $1,200 + uber eats

fake blood (assuming generous discount on bulk purchase): $2,000,000 i am so not kidding i did the math this is nuts

editing: average adult body-weight equivalent in monster energy drinks

[vrabia]

update when markiplier announced he's producing the dvd/blu-ray himself i was like cool he's personally supervising the process and then he was like no i mean i'm making them myself at my house and i imagined some kind of complicated gargantuan contraption dutifully chugging along 24/7 blowing up this man's electricity bill and then he was like

anyway if you buy an iron lung dvd/blu-ray: it was made on a printer-sized machine. at markiplier's house.

[orcposts]

ORC AFFIRMATIONS

My scars are COOL and TUSKY

My scars DO look like I got them during RITUAL COMBAT

My scars DO NOT look like I got them by tripping over a RUSTY FENCE concealed by TREACHEROUS UNDERBRUSH

MY SCARS ARE VALID NO MATTER WHAT GORM SAYS

[juniper-ascending]

Listening and nodding sympathetically: I dunno dude sounds like you should kill gorm

[orcposts]

i should kill gorm

[silvaurum]

basketball dracula isn't real dude he can't-- *sudden squeaking noises from the shadows*

[silvaurum]

*two pool toys having sex tumble by in the wind* oh thank god

[silvaurum]

*thunderous slam dunk noise*

[ann-is-amazing-person]

BLOODYMARY REVERSE AU! BLOODYMARY REVERSE AU! BLOODYMARY REVERSE AU!

[transfaguette]

when you’re a little girl boys will say “so if boys and girls are equal that means I get to hit you right?”

and then you grow up to be a trans man and people will say to you “oh i thought you wanted to be a man, that means you have to put up with [abusive behavior]”

and they will tell you these 2 things do not stem from the same desires of gendered punishment and control

[transfaguette]

#cis men view trans men as women they can hit without scrutiny #and cis women view trans men as men they can hit without consequences

[puppygirldick]

Viktor Lyapkalo Artwork: 'Blowing bubbles' & 'Evening' Painted 9 years apart.

Same woman

[asteroidtroglodyte]

[asteroidtroglodyte]

Yooo I went and looked up the Artist responsible for these masterpieces and holy shit did this guy love Big Women:

[nudity under the cut]

A man of excellent taste, I dare say!

[spiritbladed]

something something extremely sexy when magic users resort to physical violence. yeah i have the power of god and anime on my side but i also have THESE HANDS. i cast Punch You In The Face. i take my magic staff through which i channel the vast energies of the elements and the cosmos and i cast Severe Concussion And Skull Fracture. casting time for xenoglossy too long, chose the quicker route of Stab You In The Throat.

[littlemissihaveaquestion]

Reminder that spring will always come back, music will never stop being created, and there are still so many books left to read! You’re alive! You’re alive! You’re alive!

[mossbone]

"I have depression." - character who has been through extensive therapy.

"I feel dead inside all the time and nothing helps!" - character who does like, regular introspective thinking and is aware of the concept of mental health.

"Leave me the fuck alone I'll be fine once I get over my stupid shit." - repressed character.

"It's fine I'm just having an Empty Time. What? Yeah, empty times, you know, when everything is like bzzzzzz in your brain and you don't shower for two weeks. Why, what do you call it?" - ooooughhh now we're talkin

[ruffboi-mags]

#this post is a jillion times better than all the posts that complaina bout therapyspeak #this one SHOWS the relationship between characterization and conceptualization #of depression #as an example of that relationship in general (via @rubynye)

[teaspoonnebula]

I get in the dumps at times, and don’t open my mouth for days on end. You must not think I am sulky when I do that. Just let me alone, and I’ll soon be right.

- Sherlock Holmes in A Study in Scarlet

[draconym]

I just saw an acquaintance use "👖🛝" in place of the word genocide and. like. at what point are we going to decide that this kind of self-censorship is too degrading to abide anymore.

[draconym]

"grape" "sewer-slide" "the panini" I feel like I'm surrounded by Rugrats who overheard the grown ups talking about the news.

[draconym]

I'm tired of seeing people excuse algospeak because "corporations are making us do it." Why are we all letting them do that. The Internet is real life. Get mad about it.

[narutwitter]

[fidelcostco]

the human brain is so cool, if you're tired and stressed enough, your brain will go, "don't worry, I got you" and shadows will start moving

[fidelcostco]

and what's the genital situation on the shadows

[fidelcostco]

oh this is my post

[asimpleram]

This was on a post discussing shit parents doing a new satanic panic. Valid points all around but. But I’m crying. This is the funniest lie ever, no parody I could come up with this will be this funny. Nonbinary Julius Cesar

[unprofessionalartist]

It's him, Julius xi/xir

[sexy-people-contests-2026]

When I tell you I wheezed