Supernatural Overload

[professionalfangirlingblogger]

At a party where nobody knows Supernatural, but Heat of the Moment played, and it was followed by Carry on Wayward Son 😭 I am not okay right now

[cottoncandyofterror]

Another comic, in which Dean saves Cas from the Empty - nothing new here but on their way back to the bunker they stop at a motel and oh no! There is only one bed 🤭

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[professionalfangirlingblogger]

His Forever Love

Summary:  When little Sammy says he hates Dean, Dean breaks. He runs to the woods, and an injured bunny finds him. Dean starts to believe angels really are watching over. Many years later, Dean meets this beautiful man and becomes instantly intrigued. Angels may be closer than ever, still carefully watching over Dean.

---

The only sound that stifled his sobs was the crunching of the branches and leaves beneath his boots and the rustle of bushes as he ran past and through them. Otherwise, Dean’s pain showed through hiccuped gasps of air as he tries to remove the devastating feeling of being told by Sammy that he’s not needed. Of course, the exact words were ‘I hate you, I wish Mom were here because she’d at least make this nightmare end.’ Dean left at that, knowing that he can never substitute his mother, could never make this nightmare end because this shitshow was never-ending.

Dad is going to be gone for at least two more days, and he’s going to flip his shit if he finds out that Dean left Sammy alone in the motel, but Dean needed this. He wants to just be a kid that could have someone looking over him like he did for Sam, but he’s all alone. Nobody is looking over him. Mom lied. Angels are never going to save him because he’s all alone.

Dean crashes to the ground and screams long and loud, scaring all the birds, and all other animals he presumes, along with them. He stands and punches a tree over and over and over, hating himself for not doing enough, for letting everyone down, especially Sammy who now hates him. He wishes he could have done better, could have known where he went wrong, but he only refused to bring Sam to the arcade today because he’s just too tired and scared and lonely, and didn’t want to share his brother today. Selfish, loser, shitty. That’s what he is. Completely worthy of Sammy’s hate because he can never be Mom.

Mom with her gentle words and never ending patience. Mom with her sweet perfume and beautiful lullabies. Mom with her monstrously good cooking and jokes and laughter and love.

Dean is not Mom and could never be.

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[professionalfangirlingblogger]

The Care Package

Summary:  After Gabriel passes while deployed, Cas finds himself adopting a soldier with gorgeous green eyes to send care packages to. Dean and Cas both need those packages and letters, finding comfort and healing in each other despite the distance.

---

Dear Gabriel,

These past two years have been amazing and horrible at the same time. I miss you dearly, brother, but I know that you are watching over me, so thank you. Let me tell you about it, I wasn’t sure about this soldier, but…

---

Cas isn’t sure why this particular soldier on the site caught his eye. Maybe it’s because he is listed as deployed for two years already and no one has claimed him to give care packages, and it reminds him that Gabriel was deployed two years ago as well. Or maybe it’s because he has an unhealthy obsession with junk food just like Gabriel was. Or maybe it’s because the man in the picture isn’t smiling, and Cas finds himself wanting to be the reason for a smile because Gabriel was always smiling. Or maybe it’s just because the soldier is attractive and he just needed to send a package to fill this hole that Gabriel left in his routine.

Either way, Castiel finds himself adopting the soldier named Dean Winchester and immediately screenshots the list of recommended supplies. He grabs his keys and makes his way to the grocery store to start off with finding snacks.

Cas grabs bacon jerky (because Dean listed his favorite food as bacon), a small pie that he knows he will have to package just right to preserve it (because Dean only listed PIE as a priority), water flavoring packets (because Gabriel always complained about tasting water every day without the promise of sugar), protein bars, and Skittles (Gabriel’s favorite).

Cas checks out and moves to a local store that sells good quality, cheap clothing. He grabs underwear, socks, an undershirt, and a pair of shorts to cover the necessities. He also grabs some shoe polish that Cas knows is too expensive on the ship that every soldier needs to clean their boots. He grabs some cologne and deodorant as well as tissues and shower supplies such as shampoo, conditioner, body wash, and hair product. He grabs toothpaste, a toothbrush, and floss as well as a small mouth wash. He takes some gum as a last-minute decision at the check-out.

When Cas feels like he has enough to fill the box, he heads home and picks up a box at the post office to fill when he gets home.

Cas properly fills it and sits down at his desk to write the letter that he has no idea how to write. With Gabriel it was easy because Gabriel didn’t care what Cas said, he said it was just good to hear from his little brother. Castiel decides to write this letter with the same mindset: that Dean doesn’t care what he says so long as someone is writing him. So, he puts pen to paper and just writes:

Dear Dean,

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[professionalfangirlingblogger]

Let’s Roleplay Boyfriends

Summary:  Dean is helplessly in love with his best friend, who is in a relationship with someone else. When Cas gets dumped, he wants to make Balthazar jealous, so he asks Dean to roleplay as his boyfriend at the next Supernatural LARP-ing event. Dean is helpless and can't refuse. Dean's sure this week will break him.

---

Dean was able to keep this a secret for so long from anyone close to him, able to go once a year for a week on a ‘business trip’. And yet the boy with the messy black hair and vibrant blue eyes fell into his life as his prince, and now Dean’s fucked. He first became friends with this boy during the LARP for this book series called Supernatural that Dean is obsessed with. And not just because he resonates with the brotherly bond or anything or hopes for an angel of his own that loves him like the angel loves one of the brothers in the series that Dean most resonates with. Anyways, he played a hunter every time because it’s freaking badass . During this particular roleplay week, Dean was being rescued from hell due to an angel pulling him out of perdition. And this angel was H.O.T. Dean can admit it, he had a little crush and his skin burned where the angel held his bare arm as he pulled him out of the pit of foam they used to represent hell.

They became best friends, constantly texting, calling, skyping, anything. And they continued their roleplay as the best friend hunter and angel duo fighting demons and angels as they went, usually having to find different places in the woods to camp out in between fights because they couldn’t be caught. Cas had only died once in the roleplay and Dean died once, the other insisting on being killed as well to go out with the best friend to lounge together in a motel for the rest of the week they were meant to be gone. Dean didn’t mind, especially as his stupid crush turned into more and he finally admitted that he was in love with this angel, this real life angel that was kind, generous, funny, and so, so ignorant to pop culture, much like the angel in the book. And he is in love with his best friend. His best friend who is not single.

He had come out to Sammy as a result of this realization of being bi. Sam took it in stride, trying to set Dean up with guys and girls alike until Dean broke and told Sam everything. Not about LARP-ing, mind you, but about loving his best friend that he meets every year on these supposed business trips. Dean knows that Sam is a bit suspicious of these trips, but he still has no evidence, so Dean keeps up the ruse. Sam kept trying to push Dean to ask Cas out, but Dean wimped out every time and now he has no chance because Cas keeps raving about this boyfriend and how in love he is and even takes pictures to send to Dean of them sleeping or of them doing anything together (not sex, thank god).

Every picture hurts Dean to the very core because he wants to be the one cuddling Cas, he wants to be the one kissing Cas, he wants to be the one taking Cas on these trips. But he’s a coward, and now he’s paying the price.

But a few weeks before their next LARP, Dean gets a call from Castiel while he is moping about his loss and fretting about acting weird around Cas and whatnot.

“Heya, Cas,” Dean says cheerfully, putting on the front he always has to nowadays after looking at the pictures Cas has sent for the hundredth time.

“Hello, Dean,” Cas rasps. Dean instantly knows that something is wrong.

“Cas? What’s going on, buddy?”

“Balth...he, uh, he broke up with me,” Cas says seemingly calm, but Dean knows better. He knows that when Cas removes all the emotion in his voice that he’s hurting too bad to let anyone else know that he has emotions to be hurt.

“Cas,” Dean sighs, not knowing what to say. “What do you need? Anything, anything at all and I’ll do it, promise, bud.”

“I don’t know. I do not wish to talk about it, but I feel the need to take...revenge? He said I, uh, am too boring and nerdy for him, never wanting to go out to bars or these...sex clubs that he wants to go to. Am I boring, Dean?”

“Hell, no, Cas. Not you. I wouldn’t try to talk to you every second I can if I thought you were boring. Hell, I think you’re one of the most interesting people I know. I like that you’re nerdy, and he should have never tried to pressure you into that crap. If it’s not for you, then it’s not for you and any good boyfriend would have respected that boundary.”

“...Thank you, Dean.”

“‘Course.”

There’s a slight pause and Dean lets Cas take the next step in what he wants to talk about. Dean’s never been good at this stuff anyways, so he lets Cas say what he needs instead of trying to guess.

“Be my boyfriend,” Cas suddenly says. Dean’s brain stops working because what. the. fuck.

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[professionalfangirlingblogger]

It Took a Bang

Summary:  The unresolved sexual tension finally breaks as Cas and Dean hook up. Turns out it was Sam's meddling that finally got them to get over themselves. Sam might come to regret it though; payback's a bitch.

---

Dean doesn’t even know how they ended up in bed together, but he loves the feeling of Cas writhing beneath him, like putty in Dean’s hands. Dean pins Cas to the bed with his hands over his head as Dean bites into Cas’s neck and sucks, leaving marks to claim his angel. He grinds his hips with Cas’s and eats up the moans that he earns, moving his lips down his angel’s naked body.

Dean grasps Cas’s naked cock in his hand and Cas arches up into him. Dean gives him a few strokes before looking down and groaning at the sight of Cas’s red cock disappearing and reappearing as he fucks into Dean’s hand.

Dean takes his own cock into his hand as well, rubbing them together in one hand and moaning as Cas cries out his name and spills over his stomach. Dean smirks before moving down and taking the oversensitive cock in his mouth and swirling his tongue over the head, pinning Cas’s hips down as he cries out at the sensation of overstimulated flesh, but Dean keeps going until Cas is crying out and works himself hard again.

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[professionalfangirlingblogger]

It’s so Good to See You

Summary:  Cas starts answering the phone with "Dean! It's so good to hear from you," making Dean feel special. After the Empty, Dean is devistated, but he copes. He almost loses it when Cas comes back saying "Dean! It's so good to see you."

---

Dean wasn’t used to people being excited to hear from him. Usually, he brought bad news and stress, he didn’t really call for the hell of it. Sam would answer the phone with a “Yeah?” or “What’d you find?” Dad wouldn’t even say anything, just saying the bare minimum as Dean explained the situation.

So, when Cas answered the phone with, “Dean! It’s so good to hear from you,” Dean really didn’t know how to respond.

All that came out of his mouth was, “Oh. Well. Good.”

Probably had to be the least eloquent, dumbest response he had ever given, but Cas had taken him totally off guard. Good to hear from him? Since when?

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[professionalfangirlingblogger]

Mine

Summary:  Dean takes it slow after Cas returns from the Empty as they both struggle with the aftermath of Cas leaving like that. However, Cas is getting more and more frustrated the longer Dean walks on eggshells around him, leading to hot, possessive smut.

---

After the Empty, Cas couldn’t stand the dark.

When Cas had returned, he found Dean’s lips crashing against his own paired with dozens of “I love you”s mumbled against lips. He couldn’t believe that he had Dean Winchester in his arms, completely and totally his.

They started to sleep together, not yet in the biblical sense, although Cas wanted to. Dean seemed to walk on eggshells around Cas, as if one wrong move, one strong feeling of happiness, would send him away again. They still kissed, but not as passionately as that first kiss. Cas wanted to be closer.

It didn’t help Dean’s worried nature that Cas couldn’t sleep without a nightlight. They found that out the first night when Cas had a panic attack once the lights were out, even curled against Dean. It took hours for him to fully recover, to fully pull out from those flashbacks. That next night, there was a little light in the corner, projecting stars on the ceiling so that they were bathed in a gentle glow. Cas liked that he could see Dean better like this, too, reassuring himself that all this was real.

Dean had nightmares consistently for a while, mostly about Cas leaving, which didn’t help either. He mainly just wanted to hold Cas close after those, afraid that he would disappear from under his fingers if he didn’t hold Cas close enough. Cas didn’t mind, but he wanted to be closer, to feel Dean in every way he could. He wanted Dean, body and soul.

It’s not that Dean didn’t desire Cas, too. Cas noticed how Dean shifted in his seat whenever Cas came out of their room, his hair a mess, as he mumbled “good morning” to Dean in a voice even deeper than his usual voice, still waking up. Cas started leaning in closer, even got so bold as to suckle on Dean’s neck, leaving a mark that had Dean stifling a moan. Sam avoided them the rest of the day after that, but it was all for nothing. Dean cleared his throat, like usual, and merely got up to readjust himself subtly and make Cas coffee.

With each night, bathed in Dean’s warmth, his breath against Cas’s skin, sometimes his lips teasing, Cas was going more and more insane, until one day, he just snapped.

Cas wasn’t really paying attention to what Dean was saying as they lay in bed for the night, but Cas just burst. He turned and leaned over Dean, saying, “I want you to touch me like all those girls before me, I want to know that you’re mine.”

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[professionalfangirlingblogger]

Vulnerability

Summary:  Frusterated over a case, Cas shuts Dean up with a kiss. Smut ensues.

---

“You know, Cas, if you want me to shut up, you’ll have to make me,” Dean growls, fed up with Cas’s frustration as Dean keeps trying to call out different types of entities their monster could be. At this point in the night, they’re both overly tired and frustrated at the lack of information provided to them, which makes identification nearly impossible without another death.

Dean nearly regrets saying anything because before he can think another thought, he is slammed against the wall of the motel, one of Cas’s hands catching his head to keep it from slamming against the wall and the other taking one of his arms and pinning it above Dean’s head. Although he’s not physically hurt, the breath is taken out of him. He can’t catch his breath for a few beats as he stares into Cas’s eyes that are nearly dark with frustration at Dean. Cas is so close to Dean, their breaths intermingling.

“You know, Dean, you are the most infuriating human being that I have ever met and I have met some infuriating people. You make me feel… you make me want to shut you up some times with how absolutely stupidly self-sacrificing you can be, with how often you think the only option is death, and just now when you keep talking as if talking will solve the fact that we have a missing girl on her hands. I want to find her as much as you, but if you would just listen , you’d hear that we need sleep in order to have a chance at saving her tomorrow because like it or not, you are human ,” Cas growls, sending vibrations down Dean’s body that make him shiver.

“Cas-” Dean tries to speak, becoming very aware how vulnerable he is right now with his arm over his head, his entire being exposed to Cas.

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[professionalfangirlingblogger]

Flesh

Summary:  While in the Endverse, Endverse Dean tells Endverse Cas to make Dean realize how much he needs Cas. Smut ensues as Endverse Cas encourages Dean to talk to the Cas in his own universe. Will it be enough for Dean to actually risk it all?

---

Dean wasn’t sure what they were talking about, but the way that alternate universe Cas was staring at Dean as alternate universe Dean whispered in his ear made Dean shift from foot to foot, taking another sip of his beer while finding himself unable to look away.

“Make him feel how good it can be, how good you can be. He’s in denial,” alternate universe Dean was whispering. “I didn’t know until you pushed me against that door and took what we both wanted, give him an awakening.”

And so Dean found himself being summoned to Cas’s tent that night, not really knowing why, but feeling a bit nervous for some reason. Maybe it’s the fact that this Cas was typically high and more carefree, or the fact that he has orgies for god’s sake. Cas, of all people, hosting orgies. Dean’s not really sure what he’s getting himself into, but he’s surprised to find Cas just sitting at the table with his feet resting on the table, looking so laid back.

Dean feels Cas’s gaze on him, almost threatening to sear off his skin with the intensity. Dean would feel hints of this with his Cas back at home, but never like this. This Cas is obvious, just staring as if devouring Dean. And Dean feels himself shiver. He can’t deny his attraction to Cas, and this Cas seems all the more open, but he can’t act on that at all. He’s not gay for god’s sake. He’s perfectly straight, thank you very much. He can’t be anything else. It’s just not...right.

So Dean clears his throat and somehow words leave his mouth: “You called me here?”

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[professionalfangirlingblogger]

Trembling

Summary: Cas gets hurt on a hunt and Dean takes care of him.

---

The first time that Dean is allowed to touch Castiel, his hand shakes. Not the first first time touching, mind you, but the first time touching . Like skin on skin where nobody gets to touch Cas, except for Dean after a bad hunt when Cas is human. After having unbuttoned his shirt to find the wounds, deep and inflamed, Dean’s hand shakes as he gently assesses the damage by feeling warm skin against his fingertips.

He blames it on the fact that Cas is bleeding out before his eyes, but the truth is there beneath the many layers of “you’re not gay” and “no son of mine kisses like a fag” and such. So clearly he can’t do anything about it, yet his hand shakes and his breath hitches.

And then Cas gasps. Not in pleasure but in pain, hisses through his teeth as the wounds bleed and bleed and the bed is a mess, but that’s not an issue now. Dean’s back in care mode, and his hands don’t shake anymore.

He cleans Cas up a bit before stitching him up, at least staunching the bleeding for now. Dean covers it up in gauze and lays Cas down to let him sleep it off, knowing that his wounds should heal quicker than a human’s with the limited grace still lingering in his near-human form.

Dean can’t sleep though. He just keeps watch over Cas, observing his moon-lit skin, his shining black hair in the light of the night. Cas looks so peaceful, and Dean wishes that Cas could always have this sense of peace. He wishes that Cas could get out of this life and experience the actual joys of being human. Because being with the Winchesters, being with Dean, means that he’s never going to be truly happy, that he’s never going to settle down in a house with a white picket fence and 2.5 kids. Cas will never get to have what Jimmy had, and Dean never wants to condemn anyone to this life, even a fallen angel.

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[professionalfangirlingblogger]

Can’t Get Better

Summary:  Dean reflects on the time Cas left without warning to the Empty, making him think that Cas abandoned him without explanation. It took a lot to get where they are now, safe in each other's arms.

---

It surely can’t get better than this, Dean thinks. Surely. His right cheek is warm, heated by the furnace that is Cas’s bare chest. Dean can’t even distinguish what Cas smells like anymore because he’s so used to, well, Cas . Dean’s left hand is resting next to his head, absentmindedly tracing shapes on Cas’s chest, sometimes brushing Cas’s nipple which produces a slight hitch in Cas’s steady ocean breath. Cas’s heart is like a medley to Dean’s ears, lulling him into the most peaceful state he’s been in in a while. He’s needed this.

After Sam decided to leave the life in order to settle with Eileen after finishing God, Dean had finally gotten the courage to go to Cas’s room after many, many sleepless nights.

Dean just crawled into Cas’s arms and no words were needed for Cas to know that Dean loves him, needs him, wants him. But Dean had felt wetness against his scalp and Cas was shaking.

“I’m sorry,” Cas had said, and that’s when Cas had disappeared, taken to the Empty in pure happiness. Which Dean didn’t know of until after Cas had returned. Dean had thought that Cas had left him in that moment, that Cas didn’t want him, that Cas didn’t need him like Dean needed Cas.

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[professionalfangirlingblogger]

I’ll Always Stay

Summary:  Dean asks why Cas stayed with him in the Endverse. Fluff ensues.

---

“Why did you stay?” Dean can’t help but ask, vulnerable in Cas’s arms as Cas strokes his hair. Cas’s nose is buried in Dean’s neck on the couch, their bodies pressed tightly together without regard to the rule to ‘make room for Chuck’ as Sam so elegantly put it upon walking in on them hours ago.

“I assume you have a specific moment in mind?” Cas mumbles, kissing Dean’s forehead, before nuzzling even closer to Dean, cocooning him in the safety of warmth and friendship. But he wanted more. Maybe Cas did, too?

“When I was sent to the future, you were still there. You knew that it was me, well, past me, and you seemed so...close with future me. But you weren’t happy. Not really, I don’t think. Dude, you were high as a kite and screwing anyone within five feet of you with your dojo crap and yet when you looked at future me it seemed…” Dean stopped, unable to finish. This was stupid. “Forget it, I shouldn’t have brought it up.”

“No, I think this is important for you to know if you brought it up, Dean,” Cas whispers, seeming to think for a second while he starts to run his free hand up and down Dean’s arm, causing him to shiver and relax even further into a puddle of goo in Cas’s arms. Sam will never know, he just thinks that him and Cas were cold. Logic. Simple as that. Two bros chilling naked on a couch under a blanket. Casually kissing and touching and loving each other. As friends, of course.

Dean waits for Cas to speak for so long that he almost falls asleep, feeling so safe for the first time in years, probably since before his mom had died, and he has his best friend to thank for this newfound calm in his life.

Finally, Cas speaks again.

“I believe that future me would have had to try harder to forget.”

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[professionalfangirlingblogger]

Not Enough

Summary:  After Cas makes a display of kissing Meg, Dean thinks that their night of passion means nothing to Cas, that Cas isn't his completely and fully. Cas doesn't think that Dean really wants him, and that that night was nothing more than a one night stand. Cas feels Dean's grief through their bond, and must reassure Dean that nobody could ever compare.

---

“Go ask him. He was your boyfriend first,” Meg snarks and Dean feels himself go blank, making sure that he remains emotionless so as not to give anything away. She doesn’t know, she’s just joking. But Dean can’t help but swallow down the lump in his throat that reminds him that Cas isn’t his. Not really.

Cas had kissed Meg, made a big display of it. Cas is not his.

But Dean can still remember the feel of Cas’s hands on his wrists, pinning them to the bed as he hovered over Dean after Dean couldn’t help himself anymore. Not after the nightmares had resurfaced and he prayed to Cas without even thinking. And Cas had shown up, had hugged him, had been there for him night after night, and Dean just couldn’t help himself, couldn’t help that his lips searched for silent comfort, something more than a hug from his best friend.

When Dean had fallen asleep in Cas’s arms that night, he couldn’t help but finally feel safe, that everything would be okay. But then he had made a display of kissing someone else, of leaving an empty bed, of remaining formal instead of looking at Dean like...like he did before. Like Dean was his world. Because he’s not Dean’s. And that’s clear.

“Go ask him. He was your boyfriend first,” Meg’s words echo over and over. Your boyfriend. Yours. But he never was. Cas never really wanted Dean and he made that abundantly clear. And Dean needs to make sure that nobody ever learns of his shame. Learns of his love for his best friend, his male best friend. There’s no need anymore.

And he would have been open with Cas. Would have thrown caution to the wind because it’s Cas, and he thought that an angel wanted him, but he didn’t really. He really didn’t. Because “first” implies that Cas is now Meg’s and that has been made abundantly clear by the two love birds: the demon and the angel. Demon. A demon is better for Cas than Dean. If that says anything, and Dean knows it does.

Emotionless is better. Even though deep down he still wishes he could be enough.

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[professionalfangirlingblogger]

His Charge

Summary:  In his need to be closer to Dean, Cas appears as a human, replying to Dean's ad for a roommate. But can Cas ever escape heaven after breaking the rules by being so close to his charge?

---

Castiel doesn’t know why he wants to cuddle his charge in his bed right now, but he does. And he knows that it’s against the rules to interact with his charge as a guardian angel, but the rules never state that he can’t imagine. So, Castiel imagines holding his charge close, feeling his breath and heartbeat and placing gentle kisses all over. Castiel imagines stroking his charge’s hair, finally feeling whether it’s silky or coarse. Castiel imagines smelling him, knowing if he smells like car oil (that he’s frequently covered in) or leather (that his jacket is made of).

It’s this imagining that leads Castiel to actually break the rules just to be closer to his charge. He manifests as a human so that his charge may see him and Castiel follows him, still making sure that his charge doesn't notice. But this was too difficult to maintain the necessary distance, so when his charge put up an ad looking for a roommate, Castiel applied.

That’s how he finds himself at the door of his charge’s apartment, finally meeting him face to face for the first time. Castiel decides to knock as he’s seen his charge do several times when going to meet his brother Sam at college or when he visits his non-biological father Bobby.

His charge - no, it must be Dean now because he mustn't freak his charge out by calling him as such - opens the door with a shy smile and Castiel tries to smile back, but the movement seems foreign, something he rarely finds himself actually feeling like doing. But when he’s assaulted by the smell of both car oil and leather and when he sees his charge’s green eyes looking right into his own, Castiel feels so giddy that his face conforms. Which he supposes is the socially correct way to greet someone so that he seems friendly, so it works out in the end.

“Hello, Dean,” Castiel says and for some reason Dean’s eyes become slightly darker at the sound of his voice. He’s not sure if this is normal, but his eyes don’t become fully black, so he supposes that his charge is safe. So, Castiel outstretches his hand as he knows he is meant to in this situation as a means of greeting, keeping the smile on his face.

“You must be Cas,” Dean responds, his eyes now seeming to sparkle. Castiel finds they look quite pretty.

“Castiel,” he corrects, sure that his charge just made a mistake, but Castiel becomes confused when his char- Dean chuckles instead.

“Nah, man. Castiel is too much of a mouthful, so I’m calling you Cas,” Dean responds. And that was that. “Well, come in.”

Cas follows and feels completely at home around Dean. He’s so familiar with his charge’s presence that being able to be fully surrounded by everything that reminds him of his charge through all of his new senses almost overwhelms him, but it also feels like home.

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[professionalfangirlingblogger]

Family

Summary: Dean has been looking after Cas's daughter for three years now and loves her as his own. In a fit of anger, she claims Dean isn't her real Dad, and it nearly breaks him. Cas comes home to comfort his daughter and his lover, bringing them closer together than ever.

---

"I hate you! You're not even my real Daddy!" Dean's daughter screams at him.

Dean has never, ever raised his voice, but he finds himself doing so now when he yells, " Oh, yeah? Well I…" but as Dean feels a lump settle in his throat, he whispers. "I love you, Bee. Even if I'm never going to be your biological Dad. I love you. So much."

And he couldn't stay anymore. Dean doesn't even know how he got to his bedroom, but he's sitting on the edge of the bed with his face buried in his hands as his shoulders shake. He hears a tentative knock on the door, but he's in no state for his daughter to see right now.

"Bee, I'm sorry, but I just need to be alone for a second. I'll be right out, baby," Dean calls out, his voice a complete wreck even as he tried his best to sound okay for his daughter.

But she's not really, is she? She's Cas's and Dean is just the man that married her Daddy.

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[professionalfangirlingblogger]

I’ve Got You

Summary:  After Cas returns from the Empty, he's in a catatonic state. Dean comforts him, slowly bringing Cas to feel safe to respond. They learn that Chuck played a bigger part in their lack of happy ending than they originally thought.

---

When Jack brought Cas, covered in black goo, back from the empty, vial of Grace in hand, Dean knew it wouldn’t be a great transition for Cas. Human again. Dean remembered the struggle Cas had the first time he was human, when he kicked him out of the Bunker. Dean’s heart clenched in guilt at the thought, but he had to pull himself back to the present, to Cas’s empty, distant eyes. Cas didn’t focus on anything in particular, seeming like a shell of a man unable to connect with the present.

“Cas,” Dean breathed, walking forward, as if afraid that Cas would disappear at any given moment. His steps sped up until he was right in front of his best friend. At that moment, Jack let go of Cas, who was unable to hold himself up, stumbling forward right into Dean’s waiting arms. “I’ve got you.”

Cas didn’t respond. His arms stayed by his side, his body limp in Dean’s arms, as if he couldn’t bring himself to function, mind or body, anymore.

“I’m here, Cas. It’s Dean. Sam’s here, too. Jack brought you back, you’re safe,” Dean said, holding Cas all the tighter to himself, being the strength that Cas needed right then.

Dean moved one of his hands to the back of Cas’s head, gently rubbing his fingers through Cas’s hair, cringing at the feel of the slimy goo between his fingers. He remembered Cas’s eyes, full of tears, expecting nothing back from Dean as he was engulfed in black. Dean remembered the look of happiness of Cas’s face, even just in the saying, that he hadn’t seen before. He remembered Cas’s acceptance at dying, once again, this time for Dean. Dying because of his love for Dean. He remembered.

“Hey,” Dean mumbled into Cas’s neck, unaware of the worried glance that Sam and Jack exchanged as Cas had yet to respond. “Wanna get cleaned up? I’m sure it’s not too comfortable covered in that crap, huh?”

Dean chuckled, but Cas had no response.

“It’s alright. I’ve got you,” Dean said, his mind moving a million miles an hour trying to figure out the right thing to do right then. “I’ve got you.”

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