All Hail The Blue Dorito @professor-kaze - Tumblr Blog

If you’re trying to catch a housecat that’s gotten outside, don’t forget: they’re an ambush predator and you’re a persistence predator. You have several times more endurance than they do - use that to your advantage! Don’t run after them; that’s playing to the cat’s strengths, and vigorous pursuit may cause them to hide. Instead, follow them at a brisk walking pace until they get tired and need to have a lie-down, at which point you can simply pick them up and take them home.

fsthhdwefg-deactivated20180515

Ok but no shit this tactic is what allowed humans to survive pre-civilisation

lowkey-revolutionary-raccoon

Some mammoth: *chilling, eating grass, mammothing*

Cavedude: *power walks towards them*

Mammoth: oh sIHT

krwzprtt

cat : haha you can’t outrun me

human:

sosyebae-deactivated20180218

What you got made fun of in school for?

slaughterjew

i went into american public school for 6th grade and i pierced someone’s scrotum with a fencing foil that was missing the little rubber safety tip on the end by accident in gym and it was middle school so i was promptly nicknamed “The Nut Slayer” and i cried until my parents let me move back to europe and live with my grandparents

genghis-khanye

nutslayer is a powerful title

jakemorph

can you imagine a european person coming to your school for 1 year, stabbing you in the ball sac, then promptly fucking back off to europe immediately afterwards. can you imagine being the bloke with the stitch in their scrote because of some mysterious foreign spherepuncturer