YOU ARE THE REASON
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Noah Kahan
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The Stonewall Inn
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@psychologistmimi
Tell me the last time you just did something without your phone playing chaperone
There was a time—not ancient history, just pre-everything-needs-a-passwordwhen you could simply exist in public without downloading something first. I remember writing about this years ago after watching a Sesame Street skit that cheerfully predicted a world of apps for everything. It felt cute. Playful. Slightly absurd.Well. Joke’s on us.Now I can’t park my car without an app. I can’t read a…
A little doomsday for your contact list
Apparently, there’s a “five-year stranger” theory floating around the social media. There’s the idea that most of the people in your life right now will be strangers in five years. Cheery, right?At first glance, it feels a little dramatic. A little doomsday for your contact list. But then you pause and mentally scroll.Old coworkers. That person you used to text every single day. The “we should…
Zucchini is the vodka of vegetables
Zucchini has a PR problem.It’s out here minding its business, and somehow it’s been labeled the “lightweight” of the vegetable world. Flavorless. Boring. The filler episode of produce.The disrespect.Because zucchini, when treated right, is quietly brilliant. It’s refreshing. It’s crisp with just the right bite if you don’t overcook it into oblivion (which, let’s be honest, is where most people go…
Say yes to the tiny, delicious detours
We’ve been sold a very polished lie. That life is something you prepare for.Save now. Work harder. Wait your turn. Delay gratification like it’s a moral virtue and not a slow leak of joy. As if pleasure is a reward you earn later, after you’ve checked every box, climbed every ladder, optimized every waking second.Experts will tell you the brain gets hooked on the chase. Hooked on wanting,…
Sleep is a daily leap into vulnerability
Every night we perform a quiet act of faith.We slide under the covers, dim the lights, close our eyes and surrender. No guarantees. No signed contract with tomorrow. Just a soft, unspoken hope that morning will find us again.And yet we set an alarm.It’s almost comical when you think about it. The audacity. The optimism. The deeply human insistence that of course there will be a tomorrow that…
Too many options paralyze us
Somewhere along the way, modern life sold us a very seductive lie. More choices supposedly means better life.More jeans, more shows, more people, more everything. Somewhere out there is the perfect pair of jeans, the ideal tuesday night Netflix binge, and obviously your one and only soulmate who also loads the dishwasher correctly.All you have to do is choose.Except now you’re 47 tabs deep, three…
Psychologistmimi at the Movies: The Odyssey
I went to the movie theater for the first time in a year. This already being a heroic act. Not quite slaying a cyclops, but emotionally adjacent. I’d been avoiding it, irrationally intimidated by the runtime. Three hours? I barely commit to a group text.And yet there I was, hamburger in hand, settling in for The Odyssey, directed by Christopher Nolan. Him being a man who has never met a timeline…
Whimsy isn’t chaos
I recently learned there’s a name for something I’ve been doing for about twenty years. Whimsy-maxxing! Of course there is. Leave it to the internet to take a perfectly organic personality trait and give it a hashtag.Apparently, whimsy-maxxing is a decor trend where you intentionally add joy and playfulness to your everyday life including your home, your routines, and your little rituals. It’s…
That cockroach and I are both leaving that meeting immediately
There are moments in life that reveal who we really are. Big moments. Defining moments. Character-building moments.And then there are cockroach-on-your-shoulder-during-a-live-report moments.I recently watched Rachel Menitoff ( a KTLA news reporter) do the unthinkable. A cockroach landed on her mid-report and she just kept going. No screaming. No flailing. No full-body existential crisis. Just…
The universe has a sweet tooth
Apparently, the universe has a sweet tooth.Astronomers just found a sugar— called erythrulose floating around in the vast, cold, existential void we call the interstellar medium. Yes, space. The same place that gave us black holes, cosmic loneliness, and the occasional existential crisis now casually sprinkles in something also found in raspberries and self-tanner. Because of course it does.Let’s…
How I Accidentally Built a Personality Around Exercise
What’s one habit that has improved your life the most? About 20 years ago, I picked up a habit that turned out to be one of the best decisions I ever made.I started exercising every day.Not casually. Not aspirationally. Religiously.Sometimes once a day. Often twice.And here’s the thing. I didn’t always want to.Actually, let’s be honest. A lot of days I really didn’t want to.But somewhere along…
A Little Chaos Never Hurt Anyone, Right?
Is a little chaos actually good for us? I have a theory. A little chaos is good for us. Not the kind of chaos that destroys everything. Not the “hide your passport and call your lawyer” kind of chaos.I mean the kind that throws your back against the wall.The kind that makes you realize, Oh. Apparently I am much stronger than I thought.Because there is something strangely clarifying about…
The Villains Who Might Actually Have a Point (And Why That Should Worry Us)
What villain actually had a good point? I’ve been thinking lately about villains. A lot. I’ve been binging on true documentaries as if they were dumplings (which I cannot get enough of, seriously).Here’s the thing. Not the cartoonish, twirl-the-mustache, burn-it-all-down types. Not the ones who are evil just for the aesthetic of it.I mean the uncomfortable ones.The ones who make you pause for…
When people follow the rules and still get sick, trust erodes
We’ve been told to “eat clean.”More fresh produce. More leafy greens. More berries. More herbs. Farmers’ markets. Pre-washed salads. That virtuous little drizzle of olive oil that says, I have my life together.And yet this week, nearly 2,000 people across the U.S. got sick from a parasite called Cyclospora which is linked to fresh produce.Let that sink in while you rinse your arugula for the…
Because familiarity isn’t always comforting
There’s something about those eerie small-town shows, such as Haven or even the newer Widows Bay, which have the foggy coastlines, the tight-lipped locals, the sense that everyone knows something except you, that gets under the skin in a way jump scares never could.Because they’re not really about the supernatural.They’re about that feeling.That quiet, creeping whisper. What do I know?We’ve all…
Nope. Not today. This is how Dateline starts
Apparently, 1 in 5 Americans believes they’re psychic.One in five.Which means statistically, at least a few people reading this already “knew” I was going to write this. Congratulations. Please use your powers responsibly.I’ll admit it, I’ve felt it too. That eerie, low-grade hum in your gut. The nudge that says, “Ask that question.” The pause before something goes sideways. The déjà vu that…
Is this a soft launch into my second act as a slayer?
I don’t know when my morning commute turned into an armory run, but here we are.Some people find pennies on the sidewalk. Others find feathers, “signs from the universe,” or if they’re especially curated heart-shaped rocks. I, apparently, find weapons. Not metaphorical ones. Actual, honest-to-goodness, sharpened pieces of wood. Stakes. Spikes. Buffy-the-Vampire-Slayer-core.At first, I thought…