Not Gay as In Happy

Queer as in I'll peck your eyes out. Aspen. She/Her. Butch Queer, married, adult. Occasional fanfic writer. 97% TAZ fandom by volume. TERFS & exclusionists unwelcome.

[punkahudsonia]

All the world will be your enemy, Prince with a Thousand Enemies, and when they catch you, they will kill you. But first they must catch you.

[samsketchbook]

[stickandthorn]

you can know every recipe you cook by heart if you never use recipes and never measure anything.

[miseducatedmelanicmuse]

Like a new friend!

[kitsnicket]

The biggest “your experiences are not universal” thing I feel is whenever anyone talks about the universality of girls planning their weddings since childhood because. Well. Not me. God bless

[kitsnicket]

“The universal girlhood experience of—“ [LOUD INCORRECT BUZZER]

[rimeheart]

“And spoke like they’d be there” 💀💀💀

[steelplatedhearts]

it’s simple: when I like an adaptation, everyone complaining about changes to the text is a whiny baby who needs to get over themselves and accept that sometimes you have to change the story to enrich the experience/work within the medium. when I don’t like an adaptation, it’s because nobody else understands the core themes of the original work and would be better off just creating a story independent of what they’re trying to adapt.

[alexmey-does-an-arts]

MY STUPID FUCKING CAT WONT STOP TRYING TO TOUCH THE BEEHIVE

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

so what you're gonna do is you're gonna trim the top off a bulb of garlic, using the knife's edge to take off the tip of every individual clove, that's important. you're gonna place the garlic face-up in a square of tinfoil, drizzle with olive oil, wrap completely in foil, place in baking tray, repeat with a copious amount of garlic bulbs. you're gonna put that baking tray in an oven set to 375-400°F, for 30-50 minutes, until soft and browned. you're gonna toast some good bread, slather generously with butter and honey, maybe a tiny lil bit o' salt. and then. you're gonna SQUEEZE. OUT. THAT. ROASTED GARLIC. onto the butter honey toast. and you're gonna eat it. food stolen directly from the plate of the gods. that's what you're gonna do.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

the garlic. it beckons you

[thesweetestsupervillains]

It occurs to me that "1920s gangster doing a cooking show while holding you at gunpoint" is an untapped market.

We've had normal cooking shows. Now we need period piece cooking shows in character.

[lostinhistory]

Solid life advice from Sue the T. Rex.

[your-worst-boy]

Praying Mantis costume by Imile Wepener

[trytogethappy]

behold the bird quilt

approximately 44” x 44”, features 15 species from the southwest us, took a few weeks to design, and one or two months to piece. everyone say thank you birds.

[hellallamerican]

bronze age mediterranean dashboard simulator

⛏️seal-with-a-kiss Follow

i'm opening commissions for hand-carved cylinder seals!!! i only accept payment measured with lydian weights (sorry i've been scammed by sumerian weights before 😔) send me a tablet if ur interested!

⚱️cuteneiform Follow 🔁

was it really necessary to bring up to bring up the scamming 🙄 sumerians already get such a bad rap

🪢gordion-knotted Follow🔁

maybe ea-nasir shouldn't have scammed her then. did you think of that?

#sumerians think just because they invented writing that they're enki's favorites #but theyre not anyone else's favorite

132 notes

🤘horny-of-consecration Follow

call me crescent the way i'm so fertile

19.7k notes

🟦egyptian-blue Follow

top 5 ideas for a megaron that will impress your rivals:

???

???

???

???

have a better megaron than them

582 notes

😴tyred-of-this-shit Follow

who do you think is attacking the coastal towers?

dorians

trojans

etruscans

mycenaeans

philistines

Voting ended onSep 11, 2024

🦆tuscan-raider Follow 🔁

the etruscans wouldnt do this 😤🤬 this poll is so fucked up

#and also the trojans just lost everything to the greeks they dont have the resources to attack right now #my gold is on the dorians

🔮acolyte-of-cassandra Follow 🔁

your url is literally "tuscan-raider"......

🦆tuscan-raider Follow 🔁

that doesnt mean anything

7,337 notes

🌸babble-on Follow

has anyone heard from wilusa lately?

#you guys used to love wilusa

⚒️and-my-bow-drill Follow 🔁

girl there's a war

#???? achilles is there and everything

1,002 notes

🪙ea-nasir Follow

i'm tired of the king always butting into my affairs. we need a free and open marketplace with less regulation

📕hammurabi Follow 🔁

aren't you the copper scammer??

#i dont think you can be trusted with a free and open market

897 notes

☀️i-need-atention Follow

hot sun god summer 💅😎

#all my followers better reblog this or ur not gonna be allowed on the sun barge

4.2k notes

🍺brewer-of-lahun Follow

a frothy beer in a ceramic cup and some dates and tying a net with the boys. can't get any better than this.

#might even go to faiyum later

27 notes

🗡️traditional-spartan-values Follow

ok but no one actually believes that paris and helen are in love, right? menelaus is a much better husband than paris could ever be

🏹odysseus-polutropos Follow 🔁

menelaus we need you on the battlefield.. get off the slab

#we are under fucking attack

266 notes

🗼tower-guard Follow

sea peoples? yea i see people every day. on my shoreline.

13,658 notes

🩼tutankhamun-not-tutankhaten Follow

i hate my fucking parents

#theyre ruining this kingdom #can't wait until i'm pharaoh #we're gonna go back to the way things used to be

3 notes

⚓syrian-merchant Follow

got a big shipment of luxury goods setting sail today i hope the seas are in my favor!!!

#especially because so many ships have sunk on the route we're taking

🕛Posted 1325 BCE

🐴troy-story Follow 🔁

can we get an update on this shipment??

#i dont think the seas were in his favor

🕛 Posted 1319 BCE

59 notes

🦁mistress-of-the-beasts Follow

come here little eunuch boy i can be so normal

14.9k notes

🏛️minoan-priestess Follow

uhhh the temple snake bit me. what do we think this means?

🏛️minoan-priestess Follow 🔁

i have just been informed that akrotiri has been destroyed

#i knew it wasn't a good sign....

641 notes

[oatmealaddiction]

So I've seen the post going around that's kind of like "kids should be able to read whatever they want and not have their choices censored by adults" and I largely agree with one caveat which is that children need to be able to opt in. I remember being 12 and sneaking some dirty books, and being interested and excited to read a book with something more sexy in it, and no one died, and everything was fine, and I was not forever scarred. However I do remember being shown a a horror film at seven by a babysitter and not being able to sleep for three weeks, and if I'd known how scary the movie was I wouldn't have wanted to watch it.

Kids can usually know what they can handle. Kids cover their eyes at scary points in films, kids read past stuff they aren't ready for. But it is good to be clear like "Oh that book might have some scary parts you might not like, are you sure you want to get that one?" Or "Oh this book has some grown up things in them that you might have a hard time understanding, I want to check that your okay with that." Like give kids the warnings and options and they will probably make a safe and informed decision. It doesn't have to be either or.

[helloiamacashier]

I also think kids should be allowed to be wrong about what they can handle without getting in trouble for it. They should be able to go to the adults in their life and ask for help processing what they saw or read without fear of judgement or punishment.

[liveandletrain]

And kids (and anyone) should be allowed to change their minds at any point.

[nikolaibrarian]

Once again, screaming from the top of my roof that people need to

1. Treat children like they are human

2. FUCKING TALK TO THEM

[tasty-tiktoks]

[catasters]

[idlyidol]

Almost done! Gonna touch up the letters, add a wax coat, and I plan write the previous authors names on the inside

[guilhernunes]

ancient creature of darkness ready to open her heart and adopt a puppy