ruby star

artist & ocd activist

[purelypoof]

perfectionism is such a curse. for awhile, i haven't posted anything out of fear that it wasn't good enough. that my art wasn't polished enough or professional enough or that there are thousands of artists that are way better than me. this, plus the fact that i became preoccupied with other things in my life, caused me to heavily drift away from art as a whole, including this project. it's so ironic considering the whole point of this is to help spread awareness on OCD as well as make those who have it feel less alone and seen. yet, my nearly obsessive need for perfectionism, both in creating art and the brand itself, has been what's holding me back. so, here i am, finally breaking the loop. i allowed this piece to be sketchy and messy, and it actually ended up making it look even better because it gives the illusion of movement. i'm actually somewhat proud of it, and even more so, i'm proud of the fact that i actually pushed myself to do it.

[purelypoof]

the burning question.

for better or worse, my ocd will always be a part of me. i’ve struggled with various themes throughout my life, but the main thing i suffer from is purely obsessive, or “pure o”. despite the name, those with pure O still have compulsions— they’re just invisible to others because they come in the form of ruminating over and over again.

intrusive thoughts are the same as any other thought: they just POOF.. appear out of thin air. everyone gets them. except for us with ocd, they stick around for awhile because we assign meaning to them. its harder for us to will them away like non sufferers can because we think, “why would i have thought that to begin with if i don’t actually believe it?” it leaves us with that insistent burning question that only sends us further down the rabbit hole.

so to help me as well as hopefully help others, i created this little guy as a personification of it. his name is poof— just like the thought that randomly decides to poof itself into existence within your mind.

he’s the alarm bell that blares in your head to alert you of these thoughts. after all, it has to be important and mean something because we thought it, right? shouldn’t we be on high alert? he’s incredibly worried, and he believes that you should be, too. despite it feeling like he’s out for you, he’s actually trying his best to look out for you.

so its important to remember: your thoughts are just thoughts. they’re not an extension of you. at the end of the day, its purely poof making you consider otherwise.