Bear religion probably fucking rocks. You're a fucking bear, you're the deadliest thing on earth, once a year an endless supply of salmon just flings itself up the river to gorge on and then you nap for 3 months.
The most delicious food in the world is protected by tiny demons who can defend it from everyone except you. Your natural armor is thick enough that you can just eat the damn hive while they buzz around you. God's chosen animals right there
the species that can take you out are literally wizards with magic boom sticks that instantly wound you from a distance. they're mostly just scared of you though, if you catch one without the boom stick they're very easy to kill. also they leave treasure chests full of delicious food around where they live and if you're smart you can figure out how to open them. going into one of their settlements is basically a dungeon crawler RPG.
you CANNOT read too much old timey fiction because I was playing Raft with the lads this morning and without a THOUGHT said we could sail over to another island "if the wind would consent to blow" & let me tell you. This did not pass by unremarked.
may I interest you a mini huntrix comic I made back when the movie first dropped? 👀
here it is >:3
they are so precious to me I can't even put it into words, nowadays I'm not as brainrotted as I was a few months ago, but that doesn't mean I no longer love them <333
Imagine: Celine joining Polytrix during a gaming stream once and then suddenly it's a thing.
It started out with a Charity Stream.
Zoey was hosting a charity stream and Mira and Rumi decided to join, making it a Huntrix stream as well.
They were playing Monopoly. The first game was a little chaotic. Mira was absolutely dominating and Rumi had a permanent pout while Zoey kept accusing both of them somehow how cheating.
Then suddenly Rumi's starts taking over and both Mira and Zoey are suspicious because since when is she good at this game? Rumi sucks major ass at Monopoly.
That's when they notice Rumi keeps checking her phone on screen. Mira leaves her room and bolts down to Rumi's, basically kicking in her door.
Chat laughs as Mira chases Rumi around her room trying to get the phone. Zoey joins them not long after just because.
They manage to pin Rumi down, Zoey sat on top of her while they scroll Rumi's chat to see Celine has been giving her tips and deal plays.
"CHEATER!" Zoey exclamations and jumps onto Rumi's stream to explain to her chat what's happening.
Then she sees Celine in Rumi's chat pleading innocent.
"No! No! That's not fair!" Zoey whines.
Mira crashes through, glaring at Rumi's camera, pointing at the screen.
"No backseat gaming, grandma!"
Celine is defending herself before chat is suggesting that she join.
Rumi pushes them out the way, eyes wide like that of a war survivor.
"No! No! She cannot join! She's banned! You hear me! Banned! No Monopoly for Cece!"
Chat goes wild, sending dono's and shit spammed with demands for Celine to join.
Eventually she agrees.
During the stream break Celine sets up her small little spot at her home with her computer and studio headset. No webcam though which the girl's Chats mourn but are absolutely feral for her voice.
The next Monopoly game starts and it's just absolute CHAOS.
Celine is RUTHLESS.
Rumi goes bankrupt first, laying face down on her bed, headset still on, still in frame of the camera, as she moans in despair, her Chat spamming F's and Gg's.
Mira feels completely blindsided as she struggles to hold onto her properties and power. She's pacing her room as she thinks ups strats and a way to get a head or Something!
Zoey is banging her head on her desk, hands in her hair and she whispers to herself. Somehow she's still in the game but she wishes she wasn't but she won't give up even if she's basically out at this point.
Celine's sinister smug voice as she mercilessly picks at them slowly over the board is poetic.
By the end of stream, they've earned double the amount they wanted to raise for the charity, Celine herself matching the number and Huntrix is laying by their set ups in utter defeat.
Of course Chat demands they do it again sometime.
Celine says she'll think about it.
The next Huntrix Charity Stream, Celine has her own professional set up now, her own streaming channel and Chat barking at her when she turns on her new webcam.
Rumi forbids Monopoly and Mira suggests Uno.
It's a massacre and no one is left unscathed. At least this time they all sucked in equal measure and luck was absolutely vacant the entire session.
The best was Celine being utterly confused by the new rules and cards with each different deck they played.
Huntrix and Celine are both trending after that.
The following Huntrix Charity Stream, not long after that, Zoey suggests CoD.
No one, and I mean no one was prepared for the absolute vulgarity that Celine drops during that session.
Rumi is huddled at her desk in shock because she has never heard Celine swear that much in her life.
Mira is jotting down the poetry of insults that fly unrestrained from Celine's mouth.
Zoey is almost in tears. Finally. Someone who understands!
They are all trending once again and this time PR has their work cut out for them.
It doesn't help that the one that usually help sort out these things is now the culprit.
theartofmadeline
stormborns
dededos
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