wont Somebody think of the Men!?!??!??!??

this is my discourse blog. I made it to save my beloved mutuals from your dogshit takes because it was making them sad.

misogyny is real and misandry isn’t.

men’s rights activists are self obsessed crybabies who do not understand social justice.

if you’re here cause you’re mad about a post I don’t care and I hope you die mad.

no it isn’t.

#heads on pikes

ashenmind

there are so many types of people in the world

ashenmind

I can’t say I’ve seen any reports of kids being killed by… idolatry? what is anyone talking about?

feifiefofum

just looked up idolatry, and while worship of a physical object as a god is the first definition and the go-to definition, it's also excessive veneration, attachment or devotion to something.

considering the hype around ai and all that it can supposedly eventually do, i don't think balking at the idolatry of ai is unwarranted.

people are substituting their own thinking with this thing, having it scan menus and choose something to eat for them, arguing with restaurant workers, the employees that actually work there, about what is served at said restaurant. like the ai, somehow, knows better than the person working there.

don't even get me started on the ai jesus thing.

it’s specifically excessive attachment to things “other than the Creator”. the concept exists only in Christianity and can not be divorced from that context.

everything you’ve listed here can be explained by other forces that are actually real.

calamity-corner

"a woman who's willing to fuck men is actually more queer than a lesbian" actually i think you just hate women

calamity-corner

i'm not interested in making space for trans men in lesbianism. there's no reason they have to suddenly give up their lesbian friends, their "community", but Lesbians do not need to make a special little bioessentialist seat at the table for straight men. it does not ever need to happen. this shit pisses me off so bad

calamity-corner

yknow what post i hate? that post about how "sometimes a dyke will mistake a twink for another dyke and vice versa and they'll make out and it's not actually straight it's Extra Special Queer, even more Queer than usual!" no what you just described is at best a silly mistake. it's not More Queer for a lesbian to make out with twinks. it's not Extra Special 5D Gender Chess for a lesbian to kiss a man. why are you so obsessed with making sure every lesbian knows she should really kiss men? why is making straightness Queer the hill you want to die on? why do you hate lesbians so bad

communistkenobi

I know you’re not really interested in hearing or thinking about this, but trans men do get sexually harrassed, assaulted, belittled in public, and reduced to objects of domestic ownership. This happens both pre and post transition and there are plenty of men testifying about it all the time, many of them publicly belittled for speaking up. What is meant by “invisible” is that when those things happen, they aren’t seen or acknowledged (including by other trans men with more privilege, like is happening here). I think you’re smart enough to know that, and I think it’s cruel for you to present your own experience of security post-transition as the categorical standard for trans men and to characterize others who are more vulnerable as histrionic liars; that really borders on apologizing for violence against us. I want to suggest that you try more to engage with other trans men out of a sense of shared interests/compassion and less out of resentment, that is how we grow strong and secure enough to stand together in solidarity against patriarchy and transmisogyny too.

Invisible relative to whom? Do you think trans women are believed? Do you think their pain is “visible”? Do you think they aren’t mocked, belittled, and ignored by both cis and trans people? This is the insidiousness of “invisibility” discourse - all discussion of the very real trauma, assault, and violence trans men face are embedded in the argument that we are uniquely invisible, so any engagement with these topics is bogged down with this reactionary claim that trans men’s pain is conspiratorially being made invisible in favour of… whose pain, exactly?

The truth is that rape culture and patriarchy normalises sexual violence to such a degree that the vast majority of people are not believed when they speak up about the violence they face. But this societal mass-denial of sexual violence is not equally applied across groups - there is a hierarchy of who “gets” to be believed, who “gets” to be a victim, and trans men are not at the bottom of that hierarchy. We are not special.

I think you are a disgusting misogynist, and I think you wouldn’t be speaking to me this politely if I were a trans woman saying the exact things I’m saying right now. I don’t think you’d be this polite if I were a cis woman either. And since you’ve given me a homework assignment, I’ll return the favour: I suggest you do more to engage with trans women out of a sense of shared interests/compassion and less out of resentment. That is how we grow strong and secure enough to stand together in solidarity against patriarchy and transmisogyny, too.

“everyone is mad at me and they just won’t tell me” —> “no one has said anything about being mad at me and i haven’t done anything to warrant being mad at so if someone is silently fuming about me and not saying anything that’s their problem and actually quite weird of them and i can effortlessly move on with my life”

this took SUCH a huge deal of unlearning because, like so many of you, i came out of a home where being quietly in trouble WAS the default state, and i DID grow up not just with the assumption but borderline religious conviction that Everyone Is Mad At Me, I Am Bad, I Must Exist In A Constant State of Attempting to Pacify The Natural Rage I Inspire In Everyone. and no it actually turns out that my family are the freaks . and yours are too

“this isn’t true because i DEFINITELY silently fume at people in the hopes they’ll figure out what they did and apologize” that’s not good. you shouldn’t do that

“this isn’t true because the ex-friendship that traumatized me ended explosively after they were mad at me and never told me why” that’s not good. they shouldn’t be doing that

“i don’t think this is true because my current friend group is constantly icing me out until i figure out what ive done to upset them and properly apologized without being told” hey thats not good. they should not be doing that

if the peacefulness of your relationship with someone (familial, romantic, friendly, anything) can be destroyed by effective communication/asking them for effective communication, you have got to get out of there. if you can’t get out of there, you’ve got to throw away any ideas about what that person thinks of you because they have their own shit to figure out before they can accurately read anyone else

brazenautomaton

you're trying to make an "is" out of an "ought"

no amount of "they shouldn't do that" will change the fact that they do

except for the follow up where i explicitly state “people WILL do this, and you should have better friends than that, because doing this is not normal or healthy for either party”

brazenautomaton

Yeah and if we could choose only to be around people we are confident aren't secretly doing unhealthy things, the world would look different than this one

have a little agency Jesus Christ.

I know I'm doing my feminism correctly when I get multiparagraph essays lecturing me about my tone

told them I wasn't gonna coddle men and got a lecture about how it's a failure of intersectionality apparently to call them just men instead of trans men

I'm sorry but that's so funny. it's "don't infantilize trans men" until a trans woman treats them like grown men and then suddenly they need to be treated with kid gloves apparently

#you people are so fucking stupid it’s unbelievable #‘but you don’t look gay’ level of politics omfg

and to be clear! we really shouldn't infantilize trans men! not just because we should respect them as adults, but because so many of them love to play into their own infantilization to make us look like the big scary trannies. they're grown men! no kid gloves necessary. the mythical afab fragility is not real

hippiedippieblondie

Male loneliness this, male loneliness that. Have they tried lobotomies? Tranquilizers? Being fingered by medical professionals? Tearing the yellow wallpaper off the walls of the attic room where your husband keeps you locked up?

ewaneneollav

if Humpty Dumpty ever stopped being in danger then he would lose his identity & go insane

segamascott

many of you seem to live like this

faggotette

yeah believe it or not the massively transmisogynistic cis man is in fact not structurally affected by transmisogyny like the transfems he harms are

fanboyistransboy

By the way my views on restorative justice and victims first mentality concerning prison abolition is directly in conversation with my transfeminism.

Because during this entire time surrounding these harassment campaigns towards ISFF, Patricia Taxxon, and others is that while there are claims of victims I have not heard this victims come forward themselves.

I don’t think anyone accused ISFF of doing anything to anyone specifically. Like you can accuse her of pedophilia until the cows come home but I have yet to hear from anyone that there is a specific person whom she has harmed.

As for Patricia she has stated before that she has caused harm and that she has made amends with the person she hurt. But the accusations kept getting reheated as second and third hand accounts.

In both cases, there is nothing these women could actually do in order to get people off their backs. They have been accused of doing immeasurable amounts of harm that there does not seem to be any apparent victims of.

Like maybe they made posts that were uncomfortable, its not a crime!

It is not a crime to have bad vibes, or bad takes, or having meltdowns from being screamed at by internet strangers!

I believe in a world without prisons, I believe in accountability, and I believe in abolishing the death penalty.

I do not think that it is the job for strangers on the internet to hold these women “accountable”

And I believe that even if the worst things that have been claimed about them were true (which would be patently absurd) I still do not think it would justify anything that these gangstalkers have done.

And I know for a fact that me saying this will not impact me unlike the transfems who have defended their sisters. I will not be added to the alleged conspiracy because I am TME. And those people do not hate me nearly as much as they hate trans women.

i hate other trans men more and more each day

can trans women have like, anything? at all? or do we feel the need to steal everything from them and harass them and get them banned just because .ummm. checks notes. its not about men...?

like im sorry (im not) but we all have to shut up sometimes. you fuckers are out here talking about "trans solidarity/unity" but you cant stand to see a trans woman happy? are you stupid? are you an idiot on purpose? and then when a trans man DARES to stand up for a trans woman you act like theyre some huge traitor for not following your transmisogynistic hate campain. im tired of it. suck it up, sit down, and shut your fucking mouths. stop being the exact fucking thing everyone hates men for then wondering why everyone hates your ass

back on this now that im not busy and typing it between breaks. because im still pissed. the ""community"" of trans men on this fucking site is an echo chamber. every single time i meet another trans man on this website, my first thought is never "oh, yay! another person like me!" its ALWAYS "okay, but are you normal about trans women?" and the answer is almost always a very strong no. get your FUCKING shit together and support the people who fucking need it most in this transmisogynistic hellhole of a website.

#genuinely unironically #they’re just straight up saying shit like this all the time

if you arent loudly and openly supportive of trans women then i'm just going to assume youre not supportive of them at all, and honestly that assumption is usually right

winged-void

tumblr boys are the type to say shit like "omg we NEED a nicer word for when someone hates women (esp transwomen) in a non bigoted way!!!"

so many of you really do think that you can be born with an organ that makes you a rapist, and you don't seem to understand that sexual abuse is a product of imbalances of power

not that you're ever willing to have a conversation about how trans women, being an incredibly disempowered class, face extraordinarily high rates of violence

if we actually addressed the real systems that enable sexual abuse, then you wouldn't be able to abuse trans women with impunity anymore, and we can't have that! rape organ it is then

all the feminist progress made in the 2010s truly was sacrificed on the altar of transmisogyny. no, the patriarchy isn't to blame for women's oppression, we actually need the patriarchy to help us take down those trannies, the real threats to women!

toki-dorki

I knew that the general populations of tumblr hated non-white women with a burning passion only matched by their love of shipping two white guys together but after reading the Kimberlé Crenshaw essay that originally coined "intersectionality" and seeing the way its been bastardized on here legitimately has me seeing red. The way something as simple to understand as, "women who exist on multiple axis of oppression, i.e. black women, often have their unique experiences erased when separate discussions of anti-black racism and misogyny are had" has been warped into "marginalized white people and men face unique discrimination on account of them being [insert marginalized identity] + white/men and if you disagree ummmm haven't you ever heard of intersectionality? *links wikipedia page* checkmate, bigot!"

Like, I am just at a loss for words. I don't know how to explain to these people that marginalized white people and men are not oppressed or neglected on the basis of being white/men, so it's quite silly (and that's being generous) to assert that there is any type of intersection between their marginalized identity and their identity as a white person/man that makes them uniquely oppressed. In fact, in positing such notions you lend credence to fascist concepts such as "anti-white racism" or "anti-male sexism." And when I try to explain this, they will ignore me, hurl misogynistic and racist slurs at me, or most bewildering of all bring up white people and men with additional marginalized identities as a "gotcha!" of... sorts. Either you fundamentally do not understand what I'm trying to explain to you or you're being willfully obtuse, but either way you are twisting the writings of black feminists so that they can fit into your incredibly reactionary worldview and I refuse to engage with you ghouls any further on that basis.

TL;DR: Before you try to lecture anyone, let alone feminists of color or transfeminists (least of all feminists who are both!) on "not understanding what intersectionality is," you should probably read the original essay by Kimberlé Crenshaw first. This may seem like a no-brainer, but alas, it is not.

ensignrobin

https://chicagounbound.uchicago.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1052&context=uclf

here's a link for anyone who doesn't want to google.

it's good! it's short and accessible! everyone should read it!

#lol speaking of

3000s

it's like i've been saying though the end goal of "transandrophobia" theory is "trans men are female and oppressed because they were afab" which is why it mainly attracts guys who have never medically transitioned / don't pass / have never been stealth, so it's very quick and easy for them to "detransition" and become terfs, like they genuinely believe that because they never lived as men it must be the same for everyone else

3000s

like, testosterone works and you can have a male body and be perceived as male just fine, no he/him pronoun pins required, nobody will ever mistake you for a woman again after a certain point, but that means you have to get over the "afab = innocent forever-victim in all situations" shit

3000s

a man who can't get over his victim complex will end up hurting someone is all i'm saying though, especially when your victim complex is tied to something as dumb and fixable as your birth certificate, but anyway

quantumshade

like damn if your “lesbian community” is More welcoming of trans men than it is of trans women then i want no part of it. sorry.

Consider just saying "if your 'lesbian community' is not welcoming to trans women that I want no part in it"

There is NO reason to pin our community against each other we ALL deserve to be welcome

ameliaaltare

no bc we're sick of trans men being seen as women more than trans women are. you should be too if you actually give a shit abt trans people.

Oh. So I DO care about trans people ALL trans people which, fun fact, includes trans men? Shocker I know

I get it that you think lesbian only means women loving women but we're moving away from that actually!

I don't think it's your right to police identities and we should be inclusive of ALL TRANS PEOPLE ❤️

ameliaaltare

we're not moving away from that, stop trying to force yourself into my fucking attraction. im a lesbian because i fucking hate men. stop trying to center men in every fucking situation.

You can choose to not date men if you want but you still have to accept that a lot of trans men feel queer attraction for women no one is asking you to date trans men we're asking you to respect us

Also not be that guy but being a misandrist is not the cool thing you think it is especially because your using that to then be transphobic

gnometa233

The idea that lesbians are just "choosing" not to date men is homophobic. Even if they're Trans men. I am actively not attracted to men. Even if you are the most feminine woman presenting Trans man, the minute you tell me that YOU ARE A MAN, that attraction goes away. I know that's incredibly hard to believe but I see men as more than their genitals.

We have one of two words for lesbians who find Trans men attractive and they're not gonna like either of them.

I didn't mean to start a fight by asking that we be supportive of a trans men but sorry I guess?

skintwist

But you're not being supportive! By saying "trans men can be lesbians", you mean one of three things:

"Trans men's transitions accomplish nothing"

"By virtue of bioessentialism, trans men retain a right to consider themselves lesbians and be treated as such by others"

"(Trans) men have the right to demand access to the romantic and sexual lives of lesbians"

It's probably not hard to understand that any of these options are, in fact, really quite transphobic, in the case of the first two points, or homophobic in the case of the last point, right?

The only people this argument helps are trans men willing to misgender themselves in exchange for access to lesbians and lesbian spaces, and TWERFs.

lady-viccy

"we're moving away from that"

get your male entitlement out of our attractions you lesbophobic transphobic birthday boy

"we just wanna be respected"

your stance is not a respectable one you fucking mitchfestian

thefaultinoursprinkles

@danny-defeato-express

hey so when you say “something is true” and someone else says “no, that’s wrong” and you say “no, you’re wrong, im right” that is a situation in which you are claiming that the reasons you believe your thing is true “trump” (trump, noun: a decisive overriding factor or resource. Miriam Webster, May 3rd, 2026: https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/trump) the reasons I think the thing is false.

that’s how arguments work. no we are not going to “agree” that something is both true and false.

if you really, genuinely think that a reply to a post about how “misogyny is against men, actually” is not only able to, but specifically intended to act as a thorough critique of feminist theory for the last 50 years and how it relates to our modern understanding of trans issues through the lenses of queer theory and gender studies while also acting as a critical review of not only the fields of sociology and psychology, but academia as a whole from a contemporary social justice framework to provide a well sourced and complete meta review of “why men don’t experience “oppression against women””

I think you probably just know a lot of buzz and want to sound progressive by saying “feminism means hating men” because that’s kind of an unreasonable expectation!

danny-defeato-express

the fact that you cut off more than half of my response to you and spoke to things i didn't say speaks volumes. you are literally quoting things i didn't say or even suggest. you are engaging in anti-social behavior. i was never involved in the argument you're continuing to project onto me. you asked a question, i pointed you towards a comment from another user that answerd your question.

and then i was pointed out that your insistence that academia and theory "trump" the lived experiences of others (unless it's your own lived experience as a white cis-passing person that affirms your bias, per a few of your own comments) clearly communicates that you are operating from a white supremacist / colonial framework. i offered a video essay i think you'd probably enjoy and learn from, given your interests. and instead of acknowledging anything i've said, you accused me of calling you bad and mean, and "mansplaining". i was not attacking your character. these are things we come pre-installed with to varying degrees and should all strive to deconstruct within ourselves, especially if you're someone who has a strong interest in sociology. you need to examine why this feels like a personal attack to you and why you feel the need to be cruel and demeaning to me in response, especially as a white person. this is the epitome of white woman tears.

you cannot achieve liberation, empowerment, or a sense of agency through trying to dominate, humiliate, and control others. these are also pillars of white supremacy. they will not free you or anyone around you.

thefaultinoursprinkles

the fact that you seem to consider black, queer, and trans perspectives as completely separate from “academia” tells me you’re not worth listening to.

my opinion on intersectionality comes from this foundational writing by black feminist kimberlé crenshaw and the work she inspired:

https://chicagounbound.uchicago.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1052&context=uclf

yours come from insecure men’s rights activists on tumblr. if you want people to be nice about you being stupid and having bad opinions go to college.

I’m moving this to my discourse blog to spare my mutuals your dumb ass opinions.

here’s ur full buzzword slop for posterity.

you are very condescending for someone who doesn’t know what they’re talking about and thinks a video essay is a reliable source.

“You’re gonna win because you abide by the laws of academia” you mean fucking basing opinions on facts???? the scientific method???? using reliable sources that publish information on their methods, limitations, and results and specifically cite the work they are using the build their conclusion so that you can independently investigate and critically analyze their conclusions from other perspectives???

but actually we can only listen to video essayists and men’s rights activists. because white supremacy or something.