one of these days im gonna wriggle up on dry land

call me crypt on here :] • strange nerd in undergrad • it/its • 20 • no consistency

[questionably-cryptid]

we regret to inform everyone that the world’s most microwaveable hamster has left us for the arms of the lord

[6mayhem]

mr. substance abuser has a suggestion for how we should spend the afternoon

[quinnactually]

that's MS. substance abuser to you

[6mayhem]

sorry women sorry sorry sorry you can kick me really hard in the head

[human-pet-they]

[kaiasky]

go is fucked up because u walk home and the real world is sorta superimposed in your senses with all the ideas and potentialities that weren't resolved in the game. not actually visually but like my body is in two places at once

(The blackberries are all black's potential points and I need to find a way to eat them)

[windowz97]

[hagiomoto]

Today's Haus of Declin strip is so good

[hagiomoto]

[cutecipher]

[cryptotheism]

Thogs are a phylum of object defined by squat physique and rugged utilitarianism. A forklift is a thog. A wooden trunk is a thog. Some dogs are thogs. Warthogs are obviously thogs.

[saintm0rning]

trying to impress a grinch girl by pretending i hate christmas and presents

[saintm0rning]

trying to make it work with a grinch girl but i'm unsatisfied because i have a christmas fetish

[charl0ttan]

im literally so. oughhh. im so excited that i get to be a girl. im so excited that i get to be A Girl. likee. my whole life. every time i witnessed certain displays of femininity. and there was this longing. this self loathing. ill never be able to understand or achieve that. thats not for me. im probably not even trans enough. its just many many singular instances of deep longing. its soo. ooh wow. just. being able to finally be girly. and cute. and. and give folks cuteness aggression. and live and laugh and love. i mean i experienced emotions before but now i take such joy in them. in everything i experience. even when its bad i still relish the experience of getting to know every shade. it makes me feel well traveled. i have such a brighter disposition on the world. joy is addictive and its always within reach. i get to be a girl. i really feel like im Here. even without voice training. i get so many compliments on my voice. thats really the only thing left at least externally that people who arent bedding me will observe of me that i dont feel fully Here on. and still people enjoy my voice. how its so soft. my voice is soft.. i still dont love it but if folks will say that about it then im happy enough. and im certainly so very incredibly happy with everything else about my transition. just. everything. my face my hair my clothes my mannerisms the effect i have on others. i say it a lot but i truly feel like i have a puppydog life. people, like just strangers wherever i go, i see it in their face, how they brighten up and become so very warm and accommodating with me. it really feels like they not only like me but they want me to like them. its such a giddy feeling to have that effect. its all i could want. it just feels so natural to be a girl. thats the crux of it is just how wonderfully natural it feels to be this girly hippie deergirl. girlyness. its just so. girlyness. it means more to me than anything. its so much fun being cute.. so much fun. just a dream

[zoesupreme]

well I think you odyssey a different movie

[radiofreederry]

Sounds hot

[thatgoblinjess]

[adventureo]

theres a whole album of song titles you can make just from the words of this tweet

[rockergiirl]

check out my next stoner metal ep, featuring such classics as:

Marijuanification

Complete Derangement

Stoned Sex Drive

Derangement Manifests a Literal Sex Demon

Monstrum Incarnate

Narcotic Parody of Sex

[edjicatrydau-deactivated2026012]

this makes smoking weed sound so much cooler than it is

[3000s]

[pukicho]

I put a belt buckle on the floor next to my bed, that way I can step on it and hurt my foot when I forget it’s there.

[blindcat97]

Very smart, good idea

[pukicho]

Yesthankyou

Yesthankyou

[7777777awawawa7777777]

>100,000 notes - mass market slop

10,000 notes - well executed crowd pleaser

1,000 notes - cult classic

100 notes - uncompromising avant-garde art for those of discerning taste

10 notes - misunderstood genius that the culture is not yet ready for

1 note - direct admission of suicidal ideation

[hbmmaster]

love when mario loreheads point to the baseball games' "chemistry" mechanic like it represents interpersonal relationships and not the thing the mechanic literally is (how well characters can work together on a baseball team)

[hbmmaster]

"did you know that toadette hates bowser more than mario does" well no, she's less capable of playing baseball with bowser than mario is. that's different

[wayneradiotv]

guillermo del toro’s little brother