quests and queers

dnd for the gays

[astraldemise]

changing elves from being assholes with a superiority complex and recharacterising them as just sort of weird guys that have an entirely different set of social behaviours to harken back to the days when people thought autistic people were a kind of fae for having odd behaviours. the entire reason why they dont particularly enjoy gatherings of men or dwarves or whatever is because they tend to be loud and the average elven social gathering is just a bunch of them sitting in a room in silence ignoring each other

like theyre still kind of mean but its more of them being blunt and lacking empathy rather than being condescending or purposefully malicious

[astraldemise]

my elven ass after spending 45 minutes in the pub with my dwarf friends:

I GROW WEARY OF MIMICKING YOUR OBNOXIOUS MANNERISMS TO ACCOMMODATE FOR THIS ENVIRONMENT. I WISH TO RETURN TO MY CHAMBERS TO REST AND SO I MAY PLAY SPLATOON 3 ON THE NINTENDO SWITCH. WE SHALL GATHER AGAIN NEXT HALF MOON AND I SHALL TELL YOU OF MY VICTORIES.

them:

okay man take care

[astraldemise]

you understand my vision

[big-boss-things]

dnd character idea; warlock that calls their party "chat" and their patron "mods"

[big-boss-things]

"mods can we ban this guy"

[abiital]

and his name is Jher'muh

[thatonenewdungeonmaster]

[localwarlockunion]

Jesse, you’re forgetting that Dragons are not just beasts, they are inherently magical and they are of the element they embody, Jesse. An ancient white dragon would create an icy tundra wherever it built its lair merely by existing in that place over time. It is the surrounding animals that have adapted to the cold to even exist in the landscape of a dragon, Jesse.

[littlestfallenangel]

Also dragons have teeth, Jesse. I don't think ice resistance is gonna be that big of an issue. The prey isn't teeth resistant, Jesse.

[icefang111]

Honestly the whole Tall-Man thing is such an elegant solution to the whole human problem in dnd. So much language like "have some humanity" gets so awkward when there's a group called humans. Having humans instead refer to all humanoids just makes so much sense in this context!

High key gonna bring this up to my dnd groups and am gonna hard code it in if/when I make my own system.

[freesiadotcom]

inspired by the scariest words my dm has ever said to me and the subsequent coolest (AND SCARIEST) scene of my life

[krakenartificer]

[Image Description: A line numbered from 20 on the left side to 1 on the right side. It is titled "when you roll a .....

20 is labeled "you know exactly how to fix this problem!" 16 is labeled "you're pretty confident that you can solve this" 12 is labeled "you could probably figure it out?" 8 is labeled "you're ... not really sure what you're looking at here" 3 is labeled "you have NO IDEA how to fix this problem"

1 is labeled in bold and italics: you know exactly how to fix this problem (evil version)]

[catgirlhell]

its official: tumblr is selling our data to Midjourney

Tumblr and Wordpress to Sell Users’ Data to Train AI Tools

Internal documents obtained by 404 Media show that Tumblr staff compiled users' data as part of a deal with Midjourney and OpenAI.

we'd been hearing rumors about this for a bit but now its open and out there. some details from this article

it goes without saying, but if @staff goes through with this its going to be an utter shitshow and im all but certain the website will not survive it.

[evilwizard]

everyone go enable this immediately. it can be a bit hard to find because “visibility” is under blog settings instead of general settings or privacy. you have to do this individually for each separate side-blog

if you can’t find it on the app then the update probably hasn’t rolled out to you, and you’ll have to go through the web browser. what a truly wild way/time to implement this

[pocketss]

happy old gnoll

[custom-emojis]

Okay So I don't know if this'll be helpful to anybody else but I made another resource Carrd. This time it's full of DnD DM resources. It's mostly a collection of links, but I'm hoping it'll make it easier for people who just want to grab everything they need on the fly! I'm open to adding more resources as well, if you think something would fit- feel free to DM me! Otherwise, here you go.

D&D DM guide (dm-resources.carrd.co)

[whitepeopletwitter]

[captainschmoe]

[mataurin]

She’s a tiefling warlock, and her evil patron is her sugar daddy :)

[evilwizard]

*at the ADHD wizard meeting* sometimes i just find it difficult to hocus-focus

[thebloodwizard]

have you tried abracadadderall?

[evilwizard]

it’s a material component for spells requiring Concentration

[filibusterfrog]

hybrids <3

[nicodranas]

Wizard: Oh, I like your Goblin detecting sword! That's funny.

Goblin who thought they just had a cool glowing sword: ... My what now?

[dogkin]

These comments are breaking me

[yiffmaster]

I feel like witches are sedentary and wizards are migratory. A witch has a home, a cauldron, herbs, you go to them with your problem. A wizard wanders, disappears, shows up at inconvenient times to fix nothing. am i making sense

[urbanfantasyinspiration]

Wizards have towers though

[arachnopus]

a wizard tower is more like a tome silo than a home, I think. they don't really live in it. they leave towers here and there as they wander.

if you're looking for a wizard, knocking on the door of its tower is definitely the worst way to find it

[yiffmaster]

you get it

[sharkodactyl]

my dnd party has run into an npc who may or may not be evil and may or may not decide to betray us and the dm was in chat today like “just so everyone knows…not addressing this comment at anyone in particular…his favorite colors are red and black…wink” so now i’m desperately trying to get a real physical friendship bracelet done before session tomorrow in the vain hope that i can somehow stop this npc from trying to do a murder on my party

[sharkodactyl]

UPDATE: the npc was in fact a shapechanged adult black dragon with violence and conquest in his heart. however he did let merry put a friendship bracelet on him and then when she was like “hm okay how big is your wrist in dragon form” he was like “you wanna see?” and then turned into a dragon and let merry measure him for a second, dragon-sized friendship bracelet. the dm described him afterwards as being deeply confused as to why he did this or let any of this happen to him. call that the merry effect

[sharkodactyl]

this guy is now a recurring npc because merry was SO determined to make him her friend that it actually somehow worked. he cast dream to talk to one of my party members like “hey…how’s it going…how are the tieflings in the party…not that i care…also i’m not lonely. bye” and the player was like “is he still wearing merry’s friendship bracelet in this dream” and the dm was like “yeah…”

[sharkodactyl]

fsdfjhskdf the dm just sent us all this image

[asingularcanadian]

dnd player (non-practicing)

[rejisol]

that one fucking concept art of the dragon age races that depicts dwarves like this:

you suck and i defy you

[rabdoidal]

this makes me violent <3

[pri-the-writer]

Calling all dragon age artists! Let’s see your interpretation of what dwarven women should look like!

[luccorvus]

Okay, here u go

[sapphim]

this feels like a good time to give a shoutout to Sophie Campbell’s dwarves [1] [2] [3]

[lullychi]

it brings me so much joy when female dwarves look like dwarves

[amethystsoda]

Adding on Senshi (M) and Namari (F) from Dungeon Meshi!