Just a side note then, but does this mean that there is inherent erasure of the identities everywhere within the aroace spectrum when calling for people to stop shipping her? It’s not black and white, and there is no good solution, but it seems like one side is acknowledging the spectrum while disregarding and not respecting complete aroace identities, while the other advocates for a polar identity but in a way inherently disregards the full spectrum.
Oof, kick the hornet's nest, why don't you?
But yes and no.
I personally think that if an aroace character's specific place on the spectrum is not confirmed or mentioned in any way, then we should treat them as “base” aroace. Meaning no sexual or romantic attraction experienced, or wanted. This is because, sadly and commonly, authors do not know what they're doing with aroace characters and likely just don't want them to have sex/date. Many authors don't know the nuances of the aroace-spectrum as well as us online folks do, remember!
But I am also of the opinion that we need to cut the in fighting out. We are all aro-spec, ace-spec, or aroace-spec here after all, and we are all fighting for a seat at the table. Sometimes we need to stop fighting each other and fight the ones who aren't bringing enough chairs for everyone.
I'm only so “ship and let ship but mention her aroace ID” with Yelena, as in the past me saying “go fuck yourselves” didn't go well. (cough, OGs will remember the Alastor situation)
It is a loosing battle, but kindly educating people and asking that they at least try to understand and respect her identity is the best and first step forward. The amount of people today alone that I educated.
I had someone who didn't know that there were other “flavours” of aroace, such as demi, grey, aego, cupio etc! I had someone who didn't know about oriented aroace identities (Oriented aroace refers to someone who is aromantic and asexual but does experience another form of attraction that is significant enough to acknowledge alongside their aroace orientation eg Myself Pansexual asexual aromantic), and many more just today with me asking them nicely to include her identity.
So many people didn't know you could be a different “flavour” of aroace, and that's why representation of those identities matters. On one hand, it sucks. They're still shipping an aroace character. On the other hand, it's a step forward in representation, understanding, and respect from some!
Sory for the rambling I know it isnt much my opinion is shit
dailybridgerton
ellievsbear
areudirty
