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About this blog:

Incorrect quotes blog! 99% Fantasy High. Will be mostly tagging with just first names to avoid spamming tags. Anything suggestive will be tagged with #nsffh (not safe for fantasy high).

Fig: My ideal date? You release me into the wild to hunt me for sport on your remote island BUT I’m not very good at hiding so you find me within 20 minutes. You hold the gun to my face but there is something so earnest in my eyes and hands that you cannot carry through. You pick me up and carry me back to your mansion. Fig: I am so polite and charming that you nurse me back to health. You grow to love and trust me despite the fact you’re holding me hostage after I fell of a charter vessel bound for Brazil. You buy me new clothes and have them shipped to the island. I kiss you good morning every day. You propose marriage. I accept. We skype in a priest and get married with the butler as our witness. Fig: That night I kill you and the butler. I redistribute your wealth. I live in the mansion on the abandoned island for the rest of my days. I study snail ecology. I never remarry. You were the love of my life but you were too dangerous and evil to live. I am buried next to you. The tides eventually wash our bodies away. Into the depths of the ocean, together. Gorgug: I'd go to, like, an Olive Garden.

#fig #gorgug

Buddy: These pancakes are amazing. Buddy: Mary Ann, if you break up with him, give me his number.

#buddy #mary ann #gorgug/mary ann #buddy/gorgug #i guess??

Fabian: You're late. Adaine: You're stunning. Fabian: You're forgiven.

#fabian #adaine #adaine/fabian

Kristen, to Fig: Why am I so tongue-tied around you recently? That's not the sort of tying I'm into! Kristen: …or the sort of tonguing, for that matter.

#kristen #fig #fig/kristen #nsffh

Fabian: Why would you move into your new place and leave it immediately? Riz: Because I have NOTHING. I have NOBODY. And you know what I’m doing at school tomorrow? Riz: We’re gonna have a best friends speeddate. I’m going to interview people to be my best friend! Fabian: What? Riz: And once I find that person, you’re going to regret not inviting me over and not sleeping with me! Riz: …not like- Fabian: I don’t invite you to stay over?! Riz: No, you don’t! Fabian: I called you and said ‘please get snowed in with us’!” Riz: I don’t like the snow! Fabian: …time-out, did you mean some of those things? Riz: I meant everything I just said. Fabian: That was mean. Riz: I was mean? I was defending myself! I was saying how I feel! Fabian: …you’re gonna get new friend applications? Riz: Yeah. Fabian: FUCK YOU.

#fabian #riz

Oisin: First of all, there’s nothing inherently creepy about a box of Adaine’s hair.

#oisin #adaine/oisin

Ivy: Buddy, you've been silent. Buddy, watching them eat: I move through life as a person who, for being someone whose whole livelihood is based around adventures, I'm not a very adventurous person. Oisin famously roasted me about, I get the same hamburger every day. And in my head sometimes I think- Kipperlilly: …every day? Oisin: Every day, he gets the same- Buddy: That restaurant closed down, so I don't- Oisin: Yeah because they pretended their meat was good, and in fact, it was bad. Buddy: It was worse…. than they said it was, but I still liked how it tasted. Buddy: In my head, I will imagine sometimes, what a risk would be like, what a change would be like, and in my head I go, 'that change would not be my favorite.' Buddy: But then I go, 'am I a coward? And am I closing myself off to new experiences?' Buddy: And every time I expand my horizons, I get slapped in the face and it is not fun. I will stick with plain breakfast sandwiches.

#ivy #buddy #kipperlilly #oisin

Fabian: I’m not upset. Riz: Fabian, we found you in the park throwing rocks at old couples. Fabian: WHY SHOULD THEY BE HAPPY.

#fabian #riz

Buddy, to Ivy: Let me tell you something. Sex is not fun. Sex is wrong. Immoral. Terrible. So stop having sex with Ruben. Buddy: I will shoulder the burden of sin. I will fuck Ruben on your behalf.

#buddy #ivy/ruben #buddy/ruben

Fabian: I used to hook up with Aelwyn, and afterwards, she would always give me a little candy bar or a little treat. And in the moment, I didn't really care. I just thought it was a cute little thing. Fabian: But then, one time, she didn't do it! She didn't give me my treat! Fabian: So I verbally asked her, I said, hey, do you have my reward? And she laughed! Fabian: And in that moment, I was like- you have me trained like a fucking dog.

#fabian #aelwyn/fabian

Buddy: I want to start off! Ruben, you look great today- Ruben: Kill yourself.

#buddy #ruben

Fabian: Saw my boy Ragh at the library. Had to dap him up, didn’t know he was erudite like that. Fabian: …didn’t know he was literate.

#fabian

Ragh: I could really go for some ramen right now. Dayne: Raw men? What are you, gay?

#ragh #dayne

Fabian: Do you know how much pussy Gorgug’s gotten because of me? Gorgug: Zero. Like, literally. What do you mean? Fabian: Girls like me better, usually. Gorgug: Objectively not true. Fabian: You’re right. I talk to them, though. That’s the difference. Gorgug just sits there. Fig: Maybe he’s just shy. Gorgug gives me shy vibes. Fabian: He’s just a little autistic, I think. Gorgug: I’m not shy at all.

#fabian #gorgug #fig

Mary Ann: So it’s bread made from bananas. Gorgug: It is. Mary Ann: And you made this bread. Gorgug: I did. Mary Ann: You can put stuff on there? Gorgug: I mean, I wouldn’t recommend making a sandwich with it. But knock yourself out. Mary Ann: This one doesn’t taste like bananas. Gorgug: That one has Oreos on it. Mary Ann: I like Oreos. Gorgug: Me too. Mary Ann: What’s in this one? Gorgug: Chocolate chips. Mary Ann: Why? Gorgug: Why not? Mary Ann: …you’re invited to my birthday party.

#mary ann #gorgug #gorgug/mary ann

Ivy: You were trying to kill yourself! Kipperlilly: …It’s no concern of yours. Ivy: Is too! For one thing, that’s my shirt you were killing yourself in. And for another, we’ve shared a lot here. Ivy: You should have trusted me enough to do it for you. Oisin: Ivy! Ivy: What? She wants to die, I wanna help.

#ivy #kipperlilly #oisin

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