you

[axedromache]

How do you know so much about food?

[si0nainn]

The slightest irritated tone or snappiness fucking rocks my body with a wave of pure fear and it takes everything not to burst into tears immediately. I can tell when someone’s even slightly annoyed but they can’t tell when I’m terrified they hate me

[axedromache]

How do you know so much about food?

[penssamento]

my parents warned me about the drugs in the streets but never the ones with brown eyes and a heartbeat

Love Quotes (via penssamento)

[loveyahyukoh-deactivated2018062]

[timbllr]

[chulalachannel]

[zackancodeine]

my mom has a friend who has a failed program-service dog and he’s literally my favorite creature

He’s a really smart lab, he learned all the commands, but he just has an affinity for doing them whenever he wants

So this lady’s dog literally turns on-off lights, opens doors, opens the fridge, etc… at his own wishes.

Her house looks like its baby-proofed, with kid safe locks on everything and stuff, but really she just has a dog that’s learned all the mobility service dog commands but has a mind of his own.

[noranbit-deactivated20180511]

Chaotic Good Boy

[cloudfreed]

This is HILARIOUS

[qnz1984-deactivated20220716]

[becomingonewithmybed]

[theinturnetexplorer]

Actual Reasons Why People Were Dumped

[pavlovscorgi]

is this post secret

[micdotcom]

Watch: Samantha Bee takes on untested rape kits and the cops and politicians who want to destroy them.

[burn0uttt-deactivated20160829]

Holy fucking shit that last part oh my god

[thesubmissive-indoctorination]

When you feel her pussy pulsate

[dominahspizza]

Parks and Rec valentines day cards pt 1/2

[cuteless]

date someone you could have fun at at a grocery store with

[lovelysuggestion]

i love you, i love you, i love you. no matter how far apart we are, no matter what happens, i will always love you

[1991series]

[crowisgone-deactivated20230422]

Imagine going to a party and the white suburban stay at home mom with two overachiever kids and white dad who barbeques but doesn’t know how to barbeque and yet is always surrounded by other white Dads who compliment his barbqeuing even though they’re just store bought preshaped frozen patties from Ralph’s or Food 4 Less and while he’s cooking those the white mom comes out and says “okay kids, here’s some pizza!” And she pulls this out and starts telling the kids why its a “fun pizza” and then cries in her master bedroom when no one likes it or finishes it and the white dad is then consoling her why she sobs that she’s a terrible mother and ruined her fourth grade straight B+ sons birthday and thinks her kids hate her but they don’t care but she continues crying softly into her pillow while the children eat poorly cooked burgers with unmelted kraft singles and too much mayonnaise and the only other condiments are two pickles and pepper because the dad calls it his special burger with a secret spice but the spice was just pepper and the kids just keep playing E rated games on their Nintendo Wii while the 17 year old older sister starts cleaning the tragedy up and throwing away uneaten “fun pizza” and whole burgers dejected from the start while she dials Pizza Hut to get these kids an actual birthday lunch and the mother then throws a fit because the daughter did something the kids liked and she didn’t and was the only one making a huge deal out of it and the daughter was then grounded from her TV in her room for only two days and the son went to blow out the candles in his standard birthday cake from food 4 less the mom added strawberries to so she could feel she did something but was still slightly teary and sad because her day was ruined by no one wanting to eat her “fun pizza”

[lordsnaccs-deactivated20181230]

i mean i’d eat it

[imsoboredrightnow33444444-deact]

that was a wild ride