[ceruleanheaven]

brought nothing to the gun fight. whatever man

[romanceyourdemons]

one of my favorite tropes in chinese literature is when a guy’s wife is clearly a ghost/demon/fox fairy and he just can’t see it. i’m reading a story where this guy keeps getting arrested because his wife will just magically steal steal shit out of sealed boxes and give it to him as a present, and whenever someone is like dude i think something’s up with his wife he asks her and she’s like i’m literally normal. so he turns around and says yeah guys she’s literally normal

[thecryptkeeper]

the substance sisters

[jan-liliten]

‎

ball 1

penis

ball 2

Voting ended onMar 10

[beyond-a-name]

[trying-trying2lyk]

i love writing out numbers and then putting them in parentheses like "one (1)" even when i dont need to i think its funny

[justatiredlittlesnail]

[dogpuppy]

[ur-favorite-fishgirl]

if you vote me for president i vow to make everything the ocean again. no more land only ocean. this will solve all of our problems and replace them with new, far more interesting problems

[kosmogrl]

trauma dumpling

[pixlerelish]

My toxic trait is that no matter what I need three hours to myself at the end of the day to do absolutely nothing.

[my-dailydreams]

[mrhealyourgirl]

happy pride to losers who get no bitches and stack no paper

[yms1]

do u ever miss your own energy. like damn what happened to me

[spamton]

cooking my husband a delicious and nutricious breakfast consisting of lead pipes and

e

[spamton]

idont remmeber what the rest of the post was going to say. use your impregnation i dont care

[spamton]

you get what i mean.

[free-post-store]

$0

[spamton]

[quinoaphoenicks]

I love you guys but I think a lot of you are the kind of people who are susceptible to falling in with a cult.

[teaboot]

You’re right. We should all band together under a trustworthy and influential leader who can keep us safe from outside threats

[yorgen-sh]

[molabuddy]

3 hours of sleep = i hate people who laugh

0 ours of sleep = waouw 🌼🌼🌼🌼🐎

[blackpyrefly]

[about to give you head] [doesn't know how to talk dirty at all] umm the huge cock store called they said they want this back