man i like how middle earth hasnt heard of therapy so at the end of return of the king gandalfs like “honestly frodo you should probably just die”
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@rainbowsandwildfires
man i like how middle earth hasnt heard of therapy so at the end of return of the king gandalfs like “honestly frodo you should probably just die”
Maybe shed a tear , a sniffle, stop your self serving narcissistic egomaniac rants about you fit 1 second n pause to reflect ?
i can imagine a scenario like that
Best lesson from a Disney movie
Should I get my friends together to jump rope with someone’s small intestine? (Don’t ask who’s organ it is)
my thought process was:
wtf is WRONG wi–
wait would it even be long enough to–
no no nope i am not gonna goo–
…*googles it*
fuck you op. fuck yourself sideways and lubeless you decaying fucking gourd fruit
also remember that they wiggle into place like eels
huh i genuinely thought we’d hit rock bottom but u just had to grab the fuckin shovel huh
I didn’t see anyone post these Cleopatra tweets yet, I have to do everything my damn self.
These had me in stitches.
In medieval culture, an event like a royal christening is not a private party; it’s the public social event of the year. To not invite any person of rank to such an event is a deadly insult.
Maleficent is certainly someone you wouldn’t want at a party, but she’s also someone powerful enough that only a fool would ever dare treat her with such blatant disrespect. The only way the King and Queen could possibly have gotten away with not inviting Maleficent was to not invite any of the fairies at all; inviting the other fairies and excluding her is explicitly taking sides in the conflict between the fairy factions.
Which means they made themselves her sworn enemies, and she responded by treating them as such from then on. If you actually get into analyzing the social dynamics of the scene, it’s very clear that Maleficent was willing to show mercy at first by giving the King and Queen a chance to apologize for their disrespect to her. She doesn’t curse Aurora until after she gives them that chance and they throw it back in her face with further disrespect.
And yeah, if the King and Queen had done the properly respectful thing and invited her, Maleficent would have given Aurora a scary awesome present. Moreover so would the other fairies, because at that point both sides would be using it as an opportunity to show off and one-up each other. What they gave her before Maleficent showed up was basically just trivial party favors by fairy standards.
How do you know so much about the social dynamics of medieval fairies
Because the very first things anyone reading a legit fairy tale will realize right away is A) there are Rules and B) ignore them at your peril
…okay, now I just want to see baby Aurora being told by Maleficent that she will be a conqueror and a ruler without peer, the master of all Europe, to whom kings and emperors bow and scrape.
ahhhhhh i need
Sleeping Beauty AU with warrior queen Aurora leading her armies across the country to glory and victory
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
@providentially-demonic
“Not only will you be a powerful ruler,” the next fairy after Maleficent steps up, “You will be just, honorable, and skilled, respected by friend and foe alike. What you take you will keep, and you will be remembered kindly by history.”
“Furthermore,” the second fairy steps up, “Any land you rule will prosper. Under your hand the people will thrive, the crops will flourish, and the stock be in good health. There will be wealth enough for all, with enough left for generosity.”
With this, all eyes turned to the third fairy, wondering what gift she would offer, what favour could be grand enough to follow these wonderous blessings of power, strength, and prosperity. Slowly, the third fairy approached the bassinet, standing before it a moment in contemplation, before finally speaking.
“All dogs with be your friends. Even the wild ones. Wolves too. If it’s a canine, it’s your friend now, yet they will never jump on you, make you smell weird, or get you all covered in fur.”
“Show off,” muttered Maleficent under her breath.
@takaraphoenix
The center of all fairy tales is someone doing something intensely stupid that could be avoided by using common sense.
But honestly, yeah. This would be such a more awesome take on Maleficent than that shitty Disney live-action thing was. I’d watch the hell out of this. *^*
Tonight my beautiful wife wrapped her legs around my waist and as I picked her up our perfect child reached his arms up to her and she grabbed him and I carried them both to bed and guys I am absolutely living my best life in 2018 and if you’re wondering if you’re ever going to get all the things you’re dreaming of I PROMISE you, you will. Just hang on. Just hold on. Just keep going. It’ll all be inside your arms one day. I promise.
I have refrained from writing anything in my own words for the duration of the Kavanaugh debacle...but at this point, I cannot hold back.
Today, our federal government told millions of survivors that their pain did not matter-- that whether or not Kavanaugh committed these atrocities is irrelevant, that actions from that many years ago (unreported or not) should not affect his career. Sexual assault allegations aside, today we watched them place someone on the highest court in our land, when he was not even able to keep his cool while under interrogation.
Dr Ford is a hero, regardless of what anyone says-- it may have taken her over two decades to speak her truth; but she stood before the entire nation and spoke it. Those shouting that she would have reported it years ago if it were legitimate do not understand the extent of that process, and the impact that it can have on a victim-- much less how many victims DO NOT come forward, as society is naturally inclined to blame them.
When I was six, it was my best friend's older sister.
When I was nine, it was a friend of mine who made me swear to never tell-- to this day I have not.
When I was thirteen, I held a crying classmate in the locker room as she flashed back to an assault from earlier that year.
And when I was 18, it happened to me.
I reported. I did what you all are tearing this woman down for not doing. I did what was"right" in your eyes AND LET ME TELL YOU:
I was forced to repeat what had happened to me. Over, and over again. With no mercy. Looking for inconsistencies, less than 72 hours after my attack.
I went to the hospital, I followed procedure. TWO YEARS passed before they even tested the evidence collected from me for DNA.
I was treated as criminal at times-- with a prosecutor going as far as asking me if I was willing to pass a polygraph. They asked to see my text messages and facebook interactions with my rapist both prior to and after my assault. I was investigated, vetted, and interrogated at the most fragile point in my life
Even with a confession on tape, I was still subjected by my university to the same victim blaming questions I have seen all over social media for weeks now.
Nearly every woman I know has a story like mine.
Do not pretend to understand someone else's reality if you have never lived it-- you do not understand what this decision speaks to those of us who have lived her reality.
To those of you who-- just like me-- are broken over this, now is not the time to despair. I refuse to let this break me, and you should do the same. Be FURIOUS: Your elected officials failed to consider you, your story, and the stories of millions of other men and women when they voted "yes" today; we deserved better. I am so sorry. Mobilize, band together, help each other through this heart wrenching time, and vote them OUT. You have the power to vote in representatives who prioritize you-- let this be your rally call.
Seriously fuck this country right now.
Everyone of you in the US needs to check you’re still registered this weekend and register if you aren’t. And you need to go out and vote. And before any of you even get the thought of ‘it doesn’t even matter’ in your head FUCK THAT.
FUCKING TEXAS has a chance of going blue this election. Let’s make that happen. Get out there and vote and make sure this weekend you can.
remember: texas does NOT let you register to vote online. go to your local town center and register in person. check out this link to see the rules for how to vote in every state in 2018.
If a man talks shit then I owe him nothing
I don’t regret it one bit ‘cause he had it coming
God’s ‘The Bible’
In God’s ‘The Bible’, the main character Jesus is a very important person.
I do not normally reblog from shitmystudentswrite but I need as many people as possible to see this