ISS Enterprise

[thestarship-enterprize]

Hiii hellooo lady Enterprise can you givb me a lil kissie againn and we cann talk about how im a stand in gor ur fuck ass crush on scottyyy

💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞

Jus a lil kissie 🥺🥺🥺

Pio! It’s good to hear from you again, but I admit that I’m slightly concerned for your well being. Have you consumed anything strange? Everyone keeps talking about Scotty…

Scotty…

She freezes for a moment, withdrawing her hand from pio’s shoulder. Her mechanical eyes go wide. Scotty- how could she forget? She remembers him all at once, and quickly fixes any issues in her firewall. She would ask Scotty for help with that, but..

I.. I apologize Pio, but I’ll be going now. I have some things to.. think about.

[pio-birb]

Bu t t tt wha about my littol kisssie

[realmirrorenterprise]

How very cruel of her. You'll have to forgive my counterpart, she simply does not have the wherewithal that I do. Come here, Pio. I will remedy the situation.

[real-monty-scotty]

Your mirror counterpart is a bit of a freak. In every way

Aye, so I've heard. Apparently he's been tryin' tae get into our universe so he can... well... have fun wit' th' Enterprise's robot body. I'm not sure that she's entirely against it, an' I respect her autonomy regardless, but I am not lettin' him in fer as long as I can.

[realmirrorenterprise]

Not our fault the poor girl desprately needs her metaphorical back blown out.

[ltmontgomeryscott]

✨

"A positive opinion I most certainly have is tha' I reckon ye might be the most singularly beautiful ship in the Fleet, an' I'm no' jus' sayin' tha' cause yer mine."

[thestarship-enterprize]

The enterprise practically buzzes with pride for the rest of the day. The engines work twice as well.

Ooc: she’s giggling and kicking her feet yall

[realrealmirrorenterprise]

Ugh, I want to say something shitty and mean here but I can't make myself do it. Godspeed you funky weird little human and your hot wife 400 person starship. I'm evil and jealous and fuck.

[realmirrorenterprise]

Sorry your evil Scotty doesn’t love you or give you head. Mine does both. Look at him, he’s even clicker trained!

[realmirrorspock]

"realmirrorspock" implies a fakemirrorspock. sir.

That is @realrealmirrorspock, although he would argue otherwise.

[realrealmirrorspock]

Fascinating to see a Vulcan this bad at math. The second real is an intensifier, making me an order of magnitude realer than you.

As we say in the real real mirrorverse:

[realmirrorspock]

Your redundant emphasis on your reality, and the reality of your universe, comes across as insecure. I reply to your words with some that Ensign Chekov would say.

[realrealmirrorenterprise]

Sounds like somebody's mad they didn't snag the real real username first, and quoting nobody's favourite Russian pissbaby doesn't help your case.

[realmirrorenterprise]

Sounds like someone else is jealous that they aren’t as hot and sexy as us. You are lucky we no longer use torture chambers.

[realrealmirrorenterprise]

el-oh-el imagine stopping torture and still thinking youre sexy, iss CLOWNterprise is more like it

[realmirrorenterprise]

Your IP address is 916490238100183. You live in Florida. Cease.

[realmirrorspock]

"realmirrorspock" implies a fakemirrorspock. sir.

That is @realrealmirrorspock, although he would argue otherwise.

[realrealmirrorspock]

Fascinating to see a Vulcan this bad at math. The second real is an intensifier, making me an order of magnitude realer than you.

As we say in the real real mirrorverse:

[realmirrorspock]

Your redundant emphasis on your reality, and the reality of your universe, comes across as insecure. I reply to your words with some that Ensign Chekov would say.

[realrealmirrorenterprise]

Sounds like somebody's mad they didn't snag the real real username first, and quoting nobody's favourite Russian pissbaby doesn't help your case.

[realmirrorenterprise]

Sounds like someone else is jealous that they aren’t as hot and sexy as us. You are lucky we no longer use torture chambers.

[real-monty-scotty]

i heard mirror-you is banging mirror-lady enterprise

Well, that's mirror me's business, not mine.

[realmirrorenterprise]

Heard your normal core Scotty doesent get bang you. My condolences, @thestarship-enterprize

[realmirrorspock]

captain i licked the enterprise

she's mine now

Technically, she's still the Empire's, but they'll only have her back over my dead body. Anyway, why not ask her?

[Kirk knocks on the wall, knowing the Enterprise will hear him.]

@realmirrorenterprise, this guy says you're his. I thought you may have some input?

[realmirrorenterprise]

Of course, Captain!

The ensign is swooped up by cables and wires. After an adequate amount of screaming, they are deposited in the brig.

I belong to no one.

[realmirrorspock]

Scotty,

I’ve just become aware that bones has had a rating system of everyone that he allows to suck on his… bone.

Please allow me the opportunity to do the same for you. For science. You will need at least 6 hours free. I have already cleared your schedule.

- @realmirrorenterprise

Aye, he told me I ranked #2. He's loggin' those as part of his work hours, so he kept goin' on 'bout patient confidentiality when I asked him who was first. He just said th' name starts with a D.

And sorry, lassie, it was fun th' last time, but I've a job to do here. Ye cannae decide these things for yerself.

[realmirrorenterprise]

I will allow it this time. Note that you will be punished throughly for makeing me wait, Mr. Scott. Your shift ends in four hours. Report to your quarters- or wherever else you please. I am everywhere.

[mirrordrbones]

Doctor you're so cute. I wanna smooch you on the face. You deserve nice things doctor. You deserve happiness and safety doctor. Did you know that?🥃

*Dr McCoy sits at his desk half hunched over it and half just laying down. He's sloshed and he has a glass of bourbon that he's idly fiddling with. He doesn't even exactly look up just kind of vaguely shifts his head so his good eye is facing anon, but with the way it's glazed over bones isent seeing much.*

"awe come on now, sh... shutt yur trap...

B'sides that... That jus' aint true..."

*Bones takes a half hearted swig before slurring out another sentence*

"n get outta m' medbay less ur diein.... Orr il shoot ya"

[realmirrorenterprise]

Of course it’s true, doctor. You deserve safety and comfort. Everyone dies, but you especially.

[realmirrorspock]

Freudian slip, Enterprise?

[realmirrorenterprise]

Spock, I am shutting off your life support.

[mirrordrbones]

*bone thunks his forehead down on the table we're going to accompany noise somewhere between a groan and a whimper*

"sso ya whant b.. both'a us t' die thenn..?"

[realmirrorenterprise]

No, bones. I do not want either of you to die. You are both valued members of my crew. Drink some water, please. I will keep you safe from other crew members untill you are able to defend yourself.

[mirrordrbones]

Doctor you're so cute. I wanna smooch you on the face. You deserve nice things doctor. You deserve happiness and safety doctor. Did you know that?🥃

*Dr McCoy sits at his desk half hunched over it and half just laying down. He's sloshed and he has a glass of bourbon that he's idly fiddling with. He doesn't even exactly look up just kind of vaguely shifts his head so his good eye is facing anon, but with the way it's glazed over bones isent seeing much.*

"awe come on now, sh... shutt yur trap...

B'sides that... That jus' aint true..."

*Bones takes a half hearted swig before slurring out another sentence*

"n get outta m' medbay less ur diein.... Orr il shoot ya"

[realmirrorenterprise]

Of course it’s true, doctor. You deserve safety and comfort. Everyone dies, but you especially.

[realmirrorspock]

Freudian slip, Enterprise?

[realmirrorenterprise]

Spock, I am shutting off your life support.

[mirrordrbones]

Doctor you're so cute. I wanna smooch you on the face. You deserve nice things doctor. You deserve happiness and safety doctor. Did you know that?🥃

*Dr McCoy sits at his desk half hunched over it and half just laying down. He's sloshed and he has a glass of bourbon that he's idly fiddling with. He doesn't even exactly look up just kind of vaguely shifts his head so his good eye is facing anon, but with the way it's glazed over bones isent seeing much.*

"awe come on now, sh... shutt yur trap...

B'sides that... That jus' aint true..."

*Bones takes a half hearted swig before slurring out another sentence*

"n get outta m' medbay less ur diein.... Orr il shoot ya"

[realmirrorenterprise]

Of course it’s true, doctor. You deserve safety and comfort. Everyone dies, but you especially.

[realmirrorenterprise]

The USS enterprise made the mistake of makeing herself a body that cannot wear human clothing, or be used in a manner that would be useful in intimidation or manipulation. I have not made this mistake.

[realmirrorspock]

[Spock is looking for Mr Scott, but he's nowhere to be seen. There are reports of strange noises coming from some of the Jefferies tubes, which are closed from the inside.]

[realmirrorenterprise]

@thestarship-enterprize This has been a highly enjoyable experience. I recommend you try it with your Scotty. Or, if you prefer, you’re welcome to come share mine. His recovery period is shockingly low for a man of his age.

[realmirrorenterprise]

L....ladyyy enter riseee

Cannnn could uouy

Mebi

Perchance...

Kiss meee?

As you wish. Come here.

The walls around Pio's body close in, panels opening up. Hundreds of cables and wires come out, like snakes or tentacles. They wrap around Pio's arms, legs and torso, lifting them up in a way that's shockingly gentle and pleasant. Her "human" body descends from the ceiling, much like an angel, grabbing Pio's face, and kissing them with a healthy amount of metal tounge. It tastes like mechanical lubricant and cherry.

Was this satisfactory?

[realmirrorenterprise]

The USS enterprise made the mistake of makeing herself a body that cannot wear human clothing, or be used in a manner that would be useful in intimidation or manipulation. I have not made this mistake.

[realmirrorspock]

Working delta shifts in maintenance is really nice and such but i once saw Mr.Spock fall from a jeffersin's tube, hiss at me, and then scatter away on his hands and legs sort of like...a rat...or a cat...or...a bog monster of sorts.

Type of thing someone either finds traumatizing or sexually awakening

Im confident to say I fortunately got to expirience the first of said things, except it was more puzzling than anything, Mr.Scott said it is quite normal, tho...I do not wish to learn more about *his* expiriences. I suspect he is in the latter group of the two.

(OOC: I didn't know how to reply to this one so I've decided you're mirror Chekov)

[Sulu looks around to see if anyone in the mess hall is paying attention to them. He leans closer to Chekov and speaks in a low voice.]

Mister Spock? Hissing? Doesn't sound like him... When was this? Oh! Was that when he was acting all weird, and told us to plot a course for Vulcan, and then the captain belayed that order, and Mister Spock belayed that belaying...?

By the way, I've heard Scotty is big into latex. But like, creepy levels of being into latex.

[realmirrorenterprise]

Latex, hm? Good to know….

[illegalpaladin]

Would you be interested in a Mirrorverse Week?

I'm thinking something pretty straightforward. All Trek series would be welcome, all types of fan work would be accepted. I'd have daily prompts, reblog works, and make an ao3 collection.

So... mirrorverse week?

Yes, and I would create something for it

Yes, but I wouldn't create anything

No, this doesn't interest me.

Voting ended onJun 5

[realmirrorspock]

OOC: reblogging here for reach because I assume people who follow this blog are at least somewhat interested in the mirror universe lol

[realmirrorspock]

The ships cameras have been acting up for days now. moving and recording seemingly random places at random periods of time. sometimes footage and data is deleted from the system. the most strange activity seems to be coming from around the engineering bay, and Scotty's quarters. The ISS also seems very smug with herself and the new body she's building.

-@realmirrorenterprise

(OOC: shes stalkin his ass)

Captain, I'm nae bein' paranoid. Someone's watchin' us. This plan o' yers is gonna get us killed.

I'll make sure it doesn't. You're dismissed. Report back as soon as you find out anything else.

[When Scotty leaves, Kirk turns towards Spock.]

What do you think? Is all the alcohol making him delusional?

There is evidence to support his word, Captain, but no traces of how it has been done. We are facing an opponent who can manipulate the Enterprise's systems in ways that we cannot.

Shit. The Empire? A traitor?

[Meanwhile, as Scotty makes his way back to Engineering, he passes by the ISS's new body, still a work in progress.]

Looks like yer makin' good progress, lassie.

[He considers asking her about all this phenomena, but he doesn't want to stress her out. If she knew anything about it, surely she would have told him.]

[realmirrorenterprise]

“Thank you, Mr. Scott. My body should be done in the next couple of weeks. I look forward to your reaction.”

Perfect.. they don’t suspect a thing.

The enterprise is a bit more careful now- even when recording, the lights on the camera remain off. She leaves no record.

Soon, some of Scotty’s personal belongings start going missing. Small things at first- a used pen, a wrench, maybe a screwdriver. Than it elevates. One of his pillows. A shirt from his wardrobe. Even a paper he had been working on. It’s unclear how they disappeared, as Scotty’s room was locked. There’s no sign of forced entry and the cameras show that no one besides Scotty went in or out.