Since people liked this post of Ilya proving to the internet why Shane is a good partner, let’s have a sequel of Shane doing similar
Ilya is in a depression low and the fact that his hockey persona is still “biggest asshole” no matter what he does has been getting to him even if he won’t admit it. So Shane posts a photo compilation titled “Every Reason Ilya Rozanov Is NHLs Biggest Asshole”
-“Bullies his teammates” with a picture of Ilya doing a celebratory fist pump next to Haas with his face in his hands, in front of a tv showing Ilya getting first in Mario Kart
-“Bullies his competitors” with a picture of Ilya laughing and Scott Hunter looking like he wants to set him on fire with his mind as he holds a birthday card labeled ‘Woah! You made it to 100!’
-“Bullies Hayden Pike” with a picture of Ilya and Jackie in the lake doing the Dirty Dancing lift while Hayden stands by with his hands on his hips and glaring
-“Stealing” with a group of pictures of Ilya wearing a Hollander 24 hoodie, wearing the Canadian Olympic fleece, and wearing one of Shane’s old jerseys
-“Dramatic” with a picture of Ilya in a feather boa at a karaoke night at a gay bar, eyes closed as he is clearly belting out some song
-“Takes jobs away from janitors” with a picture of Ilya in an arena post-game and picking up litter people dropped in the hallway
-“Bad role model to youth” with a picture of Ilya and a kid at one of the camps sticking their tongues out at each other
-“Child abuse” with a picture of Ilya playing paintball with a group of young boys
-“Animal abuse” with a picture of Ilya bathing an unhappy Anya in a kiddie pool in the backyard
-“Disturbing local wildlife” with a blurry picture of Ilya running away from a Canada goose
-“Encourages cavities” with a picture of Ilya letting trick or treaters take handfuls of candy from a bowl
-“Unfair sales tactics” with a picture of Ilya taking pictures with people at a Girl Scout cookie sale table, the table surrounded by a crowd of people waiting and holding cookie boxes
-“Trespassing” with a picture of Ilya shoveling a neighbors driveway
-“Fashion crimes” with a picture of Ilya in a pink baseball hat, a neon orange tank top, jorts, and neon green crocs
-“Not helpful at puzzles” with a picture of Ilya and David in front of a one thousand piece puzzle, both with their faces in their hands, pieces everywhere
-“Only falls asleep during movies when its his husbands turn to pick” with a selfie of Shane frowning at the camera and Ilya zonked out asleep on his chest
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