Mental Illness Is A B*tch

TW ED 18 | 5’9” CW:81.6lbs LW:81.6lbs HW:132lbs GW:89lbs UGW:88lbs

[rexidreamer]

First off, this is a massive tw for eds, I’m an an0rexic and have been inpatient twice. I’m not ready to recover but if anybody has even the slightest motivation to get better, take it and run— get away from ed tumblr and my blog as fast as you can.

I used to be Ana-dreamer until my blog got deactivated, so please do not report me as this is my place to vent and the only place I can be honest about my life. This is for me and a place to relate to other people going through the same thing, NOT proana and I hope that everybody who comes across this will recover, however that doesn’t feel possible for me. So please just let me live and allow me to connect with people going through the same thing.

All that said, welcome! I post ed content like thinspo, body checks, rants, ed memes, and things like that. I hope you like my blog :)

[rexidreamer]

Body check 2021/09/26 5’9” 84.1 lbs

[bonelessmess]

Me, feeling my bones in public all the time

[aljdkskjx]

reminder because apparently we need it:

your ed is not an excuse to be a dick about anyone elses weight. your ed is not an excuse to be fatphobic. your ed is not an excuse to demonise, bully or make anyone feel like shit because they are overweight/obese.

fat people with eds are valid. fat peoples eds are just as serious as anyone elses and they are deserving of love and help just like everybody fucking else.

you are not better than anyone else because you are thin.

[kitchen2003]

[Wears clothes that are too big for me to hide the fact that I'm anorexic and then gets insecure because they make me look fat]

[t-rexxi]

It do be like that sometimes

[eatersneverprosper]

“Your brain alone needs 500 calories...” yeah well my brain should have thought about that before it gave me all these disorders

[oddlydisordered-deactivated2023]

😂😂😂😂😂

[coolskeletonmemes]

[mentallyillmemes]

[fucked-up-perfectionist]

SHOUTOUT, TO...

…all boys with an eating disorder.

…all black people with an eating disorder.

…all adults with an eating disorder.

…all overweight/normal weight people with an eating disorder.

Because not only white, underweight, teenage girls suffer from eating disorders.

[arc4ng3l]

LOOKING FOR MUTUALS

must be:

Over 15, under 25

has had an ed for 2+ years

pro recovery

preferably LGBT

has sw higher than 110

Reblog to lmk ♡

[rexidreamer]

Im so stressed, everybody is trying to force recovery on me but I can’t do that so I’m stuck in a limbo where I’ve been forced to up my calories but I’m doing all I can to keep them down as much as possible. It’s made me gain a pound but since my calories are still under 800 I’m hoping it’ll just level out until I can figure out how to handle all this shit

[dumbaccountidontcareabout-blog]

Reblog the pumpkin king and you’ll lose 5 pounds this week

(just do it)

[skeleton-magma]

U already know what’s up

[anafuqoff-deactivated20211206]

hey hoes im back

[skinnygingerdreams]

Let’s goooo

[skinnylittlething20]

Eeyyy let’s go

[that-skeleton-kid]

Don’t feel any pressure to reblog it’s probably not gonna work, but gotta love the pumpkin king

[ccameronn]

ED culture is turning Tumblr notifications off so no one can see that skinnyskeletonbonedollpissaddict-2 liked your post or that there's a new #anorexik post that "we think you'd love"

[tinyprettypls]

[it-s-4-37-am]

anyone: i was soo busy today i only ate like a salad and a coffee haha

me, internally:

do you wanna fucking fight? do you want me to fucking starve BETTER than you? this is a competition and I WILL win and I WILL eat less an-

me, externally: oh you should eat something not eating is very unhealthy !! : )

[to-be-dead-or-to-be-deactivated]

Someone: why aren’t you eating?

Me: I’m not hungry

Someone: but your stomach is growling

Me: that bitch? She fucking lies

[skinnipixie]

to “newbies” in the ana community:

this is gonna be a long one but if the title applies to you, i IMPLORE you to read the whole thing. if it doesn’t, please reblog. you might save someone from this fucking nightmare.

i found a diary entry on the day that i decided to go on tumblr and search up “thinspo”. i was feeling awful about my body for some time but never really thought about calories or eating less or anything.

i wrote (verbatim): “i don’t want to have an eating disorder or anything, i just want to lose 10lbs”

not even a month later, it was like nothing could stop me from reaching my goal. i kept telling myself i wasn’t in too deep. i ate 500 cals a day and no more. i exercised 300 cals away.

now, the only thing i want is that blissful ignorance. not even thinking twice about my body. not caring what i ate. understanding the boundaries of healthy eating. not feeling faint and dizzy when standing up.

I WISH THAT I HAD SEEN A POST TELLING ME THAT IF YOURE LOOKING AT THINSPO “just to motivate you,” THIS IS THE BEGINNING OF A PROBLEM AND THE START OF A CYCLE YOU WILL REGRET EVER BEGINNING AS SOON AS YOU REALIZE YOU HAVE NO CONTROL OVER YOUR ADDICTION TO STARVING. at this time in my life i would listen to NOBODY and NO POST could stop me from slowly crawling into the arms of my developing eating disorder. BUT IM BEGGING YOU, IF YOU ARE BEGINNING THIS STRUGGLE, GET OUT WHILE YOU STILL HAVE CONTROL. you see all these posts telling you that over 1,000 calories is disgusting and so on, DO NOT LISTEN. PLEASE! you have no idea how quickly this shit can get in your head. no matter what your intentions for going on the ana tags are, LEAVE THEM NOW IF YOU STILL CAN. LEAVE AND DONT LOOK BACK. OR ELSE YOU WILL END UP DISORDER RIDDEN AND HATING YOURSELF LIKE ME, because once you’ve been here long enough, it doesn’t matter if you hit your UGW or you’re still at your sw; you will always always always see yourself as fat. that is a promise. and it’s disgusting.

this is a dirty, horrible disease that teaches you to hate yourself. it perpetuates symptoms of anxiety and depression and causes thoughts and feelings that you never believed possible in yourself. it destroys your identity, your relationships, you family life, your grades, your ambitions, and your health. if you have a choice not to fall into it, DONT FUCKING DO IT. don’t fucking do it for the love of god.

[pinkpeachjams]

If you’re even thinking about getting into it, that’s the first stage of a disorder. Please seek help before it’s too late!