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Marjorie Taylor Greene to Become First Sitting Member of Congress to Pose for Playboy

A congressional aide for Ohio representative Jim Jordan, who was present during a recent photo shoot, described the results as "surprisingly elegant."

ATLANTA, Ga. – Georgia Republican representative Marjorie Taylor Greene will become the first sitting member of congress in U.S. history to pose for Playboy Magazine, according to the congressional newspaper, The Hill, which broke the story Saturday. “Mrs. Greene will be the featured centerfold in the upcoming September 2022 North America edition,” Juanita Roberts, a spokesperson for the company,…

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Trump Opens $2 Billion 'MAGA-Church' in Florida with Eldest Son as Pastor

"I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to my Father, the 45th president of the United States, except through me," Donald Trump, Jr. told a packed audience of more than five thousand.

PALM SPRINGS, Fl. – Draped in an elaborate white satin robe reminiscent of ancient Greece, former president Donald J. Trump’s eldest son, Don Jr., now leads one of the largest congregations in the South – second only to Joel Osteen. “In a vision, my father came to me and said Don, save our children, so that they might seek salvation,” Donald Trump, Jr. told Newsmax on Saturday, as a 24-karat gold…

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Taliban Pledge to Allow Women and Girls as Young as Ten to Perform Public Executions, Floggings

"A decision of this magnitude would have been unheard of twenty-five years ago," Marie Laurent of Human Rights Watch told The Washington Post, adding, "This is a far more progressive Taliban than what we saw prior to September 11, 2001."

KABUL, Afgh. – In a move that is being hailed by women’s rights advocates as a major step forward, Taliban officials on Tuesday issued a decree granting Afghan women and girls the right to perform public executions and other forms of corporal punishment – and to do so without an obligatory male escort. “A decision of this magnitude would have been unheard of twenty-five years ago,” Marie Laurent…

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Former Air Bud Cast Member Says He Was Sexually Assaulted by Stunt Dog

The shocking allegations surrounding Air Bud's late stunt double, Buster, a cross-bred Golden Retriever, were made public last week when attorneys representing the former cast member filed a lawsuit against Buster's estate seeking more than $250 million in damages.

LOS ANGELES, Ca. – A former cast member from the 1997 sports comedy Air Bud has come forward with allegations that he was sexually assaulted by a stunt dog during filming of the blockbuster hit. The shocking allegations surrounding Air Bud’s late stunt double, Buster, a cross-bred Golden Retriever, were made public last week when attorneys representing the former cast member filed a lawsuit in…

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Scientists Say Majority of Earth's Wildlife Moving Toward More Sustainable Plant-Based Diet

"The truth is the vast majority of these creatures live remarkably fulfilling lives as post-carnivorous vegetarians," PETA's Barbie Fairchild told Real News Right Now.

WASHINGTON, D.C. – A staggering percentage of the world’s land mammals are abandoning the outdated and primitive practice of meat consumption in favor of a more sustainable vegetarian diet, according to a study conducted by the non-profit animal rights organization People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. “Animals have a sixth sense when it comes to detecting even the most minute changes in…

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Rand Paul's 'Swalwell Caricature' Voted Best Impeachment Hearing Doodle by GOP Senators

Senator Josh Hawley (R-Mo) has so far refused to make his fellow senators' drawings public, claiming the submissions --which include Senator Rand Paul's winning doodle-- contain "sensitive national security information."

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Kentucky senator Rand Paul is the projected winner of a drawing contest being held by key Republican senators during former president Donald J. Trump’s second impeachment trial this week, a source familiar with what the GOP is calling a “friendly” partisan competition told The Washington Post. “Senator Paul’s rendition of House impeachment manager Eric Swalwell (D-Ca) being…

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McConnell to Co-sponsor Bill Aimed at Restricting Voting Rights to Landowners

"Leaving election and voter eligibility decisions in the hands of the states is what ultimately led to the confusion and turmoil we saw in this past election cycle," charged Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ky).

WASHINGTON, D.C. – As part of a Republican-led effort to combat widespread voter fraud in future elections, Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ky) on Friday announced plans to introduce legislation that could limit voting rights to Americans who own an acre or more of land. “The framers did not intend for this country to be governed by majority rule,” Senator McConnell told reporters on…

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Putin Vows to Give Trump 'Position of Limited Power' Should He Lose Reelection

"I'll have to doublecheck but I'm told there are some vacancies at the State Circus," Mr. Putin said with a chuckle, adding that the state-owned enterprise is always looking to hire more "experienced clowns."

MOSCOW, Ru. – In an address to members of parliament this week, Russian president Vladimir Putin floated the idea of offering U.S. president Donald J. Trump a “position of limited power” in the event he loses his bid for reelection to former vice president Joe Biden in November.

“I’ll have to doublecheck but I’m told there are some vacancies at the State Circus,” Mr. Putin said with a chuckle,…

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Trump's Deep State Ties Called Into Question Amid Mysterious Covid Revelation

"Why would President Trump claim to have something that is clearly a hoax cooked up by the Demo-rats and the fake news media?" mused Oregon's Republican nominee for U.S. Senate and ardent QAnon supporter, Jo Rae Perkins.

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Supporters of President Donald J. Trump found themselves in a state of utter uncertainty on Friday as they tried to make sense of an early-morning admission from the president’s official Twitter account that he and the First Lady have tested positive for the fictitious coronavirus.

“It’s simply not possible – this is obviously some sort of false flag operation perpetrated by…

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Oregon Fire Dept in Hot Water After First Responders Kill Unarmed Man with Hose

Portland fire chief Sarah Bloom said the fire fighters involved in the fatal spraying have been placed on paid administrative leave pending an investigation.

PORTLAND, Or. – A Multnomah County fire department is in the hot seat this week after fire fighters mistakenly killed an unarmed man while responding to a grease fire in Northwest Portland last weekend.

First responders arrived on the scene at approximately 4:45 a.m. Sunday, August 23, and were preparing to enter the residence when a shirtless man brandishing what fire fighters believed to be a…

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Oregon Fire Dept In Hot Water After First Responders Kill Unarmed Man With Hose

Portland fire chief Sarah Bloom said the fire fighters involved in the fatal spraying have been placed on paid administrative leave pending an investigation.

PORTLAND, Or. – A Multnomah County fire department is in the hot seat this week after fire fighters mistakenly killed an unarmed man while responding to a grease fire in Northwest Portland last weekend.

First responders arrived on the scene at approximately 4:45 a.m. Sunday, August 23, and were preparing to enter the residence when a shirtless man brandishing what fire fighters believed to be a…

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Aides Say Trump May Call Off Election If He Can't Lose 30 Pounds By November

The announcement comes less than twenty-four hours after First Lady Melania Trump reportedly made an off-color comment regarding the president's girth during a discussion with campaign officials.

WASHINGTON, D.C. – President Donald J. Trump has ordered the Department of Justice to look into the legality of postponing or all-together cancelling the 2020 presidential election in the event he is unable to lose thirty pounds by November, White House Press Secretary Kayleigh McEnany announced on Tuesday.

“No one believes in the concept of free and fair elections more than President Trump,”…

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Secret Service Begins Construction of 'Security Moat' Along White House Perimeter

"The president has made clear that its primary function is to provide citizens and tourists alike with an unobstructed view of the picturesque White House facade."

WASHINGTON, D.C. – The Secret Service has begun the first phase of construction of a state-of-the-art “waterless security trench” along the nearly 3,500-foot perimeter of the White House complex, a spokesperson for the agency responsible for protecting the president announced on Tuesday.

The moat, which is costing U.S. taxpayers approximately $84 million, was designed to “provide the President…

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Scientists Say a Tribe of Apes in West Africa Are Close to Developing Their Own Internet

Dr. Daniel Pemberton and his team have been studying the primates since mid-March when they were involuntarily quarantined at a United Nations Peacekeeping facility not far from the Congolese River.

KINSHASA, Drc. –  A team of British researchers say a tribe of West African bonobo apes living along the lower Congo River are close to developing a primitive version of the World Wide Web.

“It’s really quite fascinating when you look at what they’ve managed to do,” Dr. Daniel Pemberton, who heads the Primate Behavior and Ecology Program at the Imperial College of London, told Sky News. Dr.…

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Catholic Church to Alter Image of Jesus Over Allegations of White Privilege

"For far too long we have been taught that whiteness is a prerequisite for holiness," explains Kathryn Lockhart, co-founder of the American Leadership Council of Progressive Christian Womyn.

WASHINGTON, D.C. – In an effort to provide a more inclusive experience for worshipers, Catholic churches throughout the United States will undergo a drastic transformation this summer as they move to offer a more realistic and culturally appropriate version of Jesus than the historically European depiction embraced by the Church.

The decision by the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops to…

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Police: Vandals Responsible for Desecration of Statue Memorializing 4 of the 19 Hijackers

"You don't have to be an al-Qaeda sympathizer to recognize the importance of preserving this critical moment in our nation's history," the monument's curator told NBC 10 Philadelphia.

SOMERSET COUNTY, Pa. – Authorities in rural Pennsylvania are asking the public for help in identifying a pair of men believed to be responsible for a recent spate of attacks on historical monuments throughout the Keystone State, including the dynamiting of a $200 million memorial near the crash site of United Flight 93 on September 11, 2001.

Commissioned in 2011 by the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia,…

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Experts Say Millennials Are Inhaling Too Much Oxygen

Researchers at MIT say oxygen consumption in the United States alone has risen by more than 700% since February.

CAMBRIDGE, Ma. – While Millennials account for just twenty-two percent of the U.S. population, researchers at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology say that in the age of COVID-19, Millennials are consuming far more oxygen than the earth is capable of producing.

“Current trends show Millennials are on track to inhale upwards of twenty-five tons of oxygen per year -more than twice the global…

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