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[rivsmusesarchive]

8) things you said when you were crying (end me)

@tewwor // literally decided i dont wanna answer ur sad stuff rn bc of the sad yet here i am writing u new sad stuff enjoy

         He doesn’t let himself cry, plain and simple. It’s not the case of just simply not being able to, and he’s thought in the past that it was like that for him, no — he doesn’t let himself do that. Florian always tells himself it’s either because he doesn’t have the time to let it all out or that there’s really no need for any of that; all bullshit, of course. He doesn’t let himself cry because it makes him feel weak, like less of something— someone. He doesn’t need that, he tells himself. His emotions are fine as they are, bottled up, thank you very much.

        Turns out they’re not, especially after Bas leaves. 

        It’s fine at first because Florian’s just ether too numb to care or too busy caring about Griff and how he’s doing to care about himself. He catches himself freezing here and there, just staring at nothing in particular for a little bit too long or not listening to what people are telling him, just stuck thinking about all they whys, trying to find a good reason for any of this stuff that’s happened. But he doesn’t break for the longest time. So when he does it’s unexpected and very odd to experience.

        And it’s all because he’s found Bas’ shirt. One second Florian’s cleaning out the laundry basket and the other he’s kneeling on the floor with that damn thing in his hand and tears just streaming down his face. It’s quiet, almost looks and feels calm but it’s anything but that. He’s not sobbing or shaking, he’s jut staring at the piece of clothing, still and quiet. It’s surprising that he doesn’t see or hear Griffin standing in the doorway and staring at him. 

        When he does, Florian turns his head away and wipes at his face, dropping the shirt onto the floor next to him. He takes a deep breath, gets up from the floor and goes about sorting through the laundry as if nothing’s happened. 

        “Sorry, didn’t even hear you get in, love. I’ll finish this up and we can eat,” Florian says, throwing last couple of things into the washing machine. He doesn’t look at Griff and doesn’t say anything about why he was crying and there’s probably a 99% chance that if the other man asked him why he’s crying, he’d tell him that he’s not, despite it being so damn obvious. Forget it, he’d say, leave the room for good measure so he can avoid any further questions. He’s fine. He’s gotta be.

[ramettamartinos-deactivated2019]

What would you have done if I hadn’t come to the common room? Or if I’d taken an early bus or another one later? We might never have met.

[rivsmusesarchive]

@honeyedhowl

[rivsmusesarchive]

open to: everyone / m for romantic connections

        “Do you think I should check up on my father?” Oscar asks; he’s been thinking about it a lot lately, mostly because of his mother’s death anniversary coming up. With each year passing, it got easier to think about her, about both of his folks, though his dad is still a tricky subject. Oscar is somewhat over the fact that his dad made half of his life a living hell but there’s still… a mix of weird feelings that he carries towards the other man. Sometimes he thinks that seeing him and talking to him would help but then he starts thinking more about it and he’s not so sure anymore. Should he ever make amends with someone who’s hurt him that bad?

        “I don’t know… I was thinking to maybe call. If not him then someone he knows to see if he’s alright. If he’s alive… I’d get a call if he died though, right?” Oscar goes on; there’s something in his head that tells him that he shouldn’t care but it turns out that he can’t switch it off. “Is he evem worth it?”

[rivsmusesarchive]

27) things you said on the phone at 4 am

        “I’ll be home Sunday,” Jack says into his phone as he shift to lay on his back. He’s on a couch belonging to someone that he’s met just about five hours ago — they were offering a roof over his head for free so Jack was really in no position to pass it up. He had money but if he could save it up then even better. Plus, the girl was being really nice and didn’t really strike him as a serial killer.

        There’s silence on the other side and Jack can’t help but smile. To make up for the quiet, he decides to dig out whatever he hasn’t talked bout yet. “I got some really good pictures today. There was this old lady at the local diner, she said she’s been coming here every day for the past thirty years for a morning coffee and she always brings her knitting with her. And get this, she’s promised she’s gonna get me scarf done by tomorrow. And she’s just met me,” he tells the story with a warm smile on his face. “I’m glad there’s still people like her in this world.”

         “I miss you,” he says; it seems like it’s a mandatory element of their long-distance conversations even though it goes without saying. It’s as if saying it makes Jack realize he’s coming home soon. That’s a whole thing in itself that he’s always in awe of — that he’s actually got a place to call home after years of bumming around. It’s a good feeling, to have somewhere and someone to come back to, something that Jack doesn’t want to lose ever.  “You tell me something now. I wanna listen to your voice,” he tells Wally because it’s been mostly him talking for a while now. 

[rivsmusesarchive]

46) things you said when you kissed me goodnight -Lan to Ed

@waveofthehand

        When Michael told Ed to make sure Lachlan gets home safe and sound (as safe and sound as he can after getting nearly blown up in his own office) he wasn’t expecting getting escorted up to his door. He climbs the stairs up to the entrance with his regular post-injury pace, with Ed trailing close behind him. He really should know better by now; in the past few weeks things have been getting worse with the Italians and he’s been getting hurt on the regular (it’s a miracle he’s still walking) so he really should be more careful but he’s… not. Whether it’s a silent suicide wish or just stupid carelessness, he can already see Dermott cursing him. Bastard would probably be happy if Lachlan went down.

        He unlocks the door and cracks sit open. He turns to Ed and stares at him for a couple of seconds before he steps forward. He grabs his arms and pulls him in the rest of the way so he can kiss him; it’s soft and he lets his lips linger for a moment before he pulls away, just a little; his head drops slightly and he steps away. Lachlan doesn’t let go of the other man immediately, he holds Ed by his arm for a bit longer and then lets his hand trail down Ed’s forearm, his wrist and his fingers before they finally loses the touch. “I’ll be fine. Goodnight,” he says; he still has his head down, eyes on the floor instead Ed’s face as he turns to head inside.

[rpmememaker]

VALENTINE’S INSPIRED MEMES

“He loves me, he loves me not… oh.”

“She loves me, she loves me not… oh.”

“I don’t think it’s love…”

“So, is there anyone you’re secretly crushing on?”

“I don’t even like chocolate.”

“Yeah, nothing says ‘I love you’ more than a bouquet that’ll die in two days…”

“I’m not sure if they’re a secret admirer or a stalker… but at least they have good taste in gifts.”

“Oh! It’s my favourite time of year.”

“If I send a mass text to all the people I like, I don’t need to get all of them gifts do I?”

“I’ve never had a Valentine.”

“Will you be my Valentine?”

“Do you have a Valentine yet?”

“No one ever serenades me any more.”

“Just don’t write a song and play it in front of everyone again… it’s embarrassing.”

“Any secret admirers?”

“Oh, so you’re my secret admirer?”

“I may have been admiring you not so secretly.”

“Just because you like me doesn’t mean the feeling is mutual.”

“Seeing as we’ve both not got anyone, do you want to come to mine and watch a film?

"We’re never getting back together.”

“So, he got me a teddy bear, but we fought and he tore off it’s head.”

“How about instead of being ridiculous on one day of the year, you just be a decent partner for the other 364 days?!”

“We’re not together any more.”

“If you haven’t booked a table we definitely won’t get to eat there on such short notice.”

“It’s just Valentine’s day… I don’t see the big deal.”

“What do you mean you didn’t get me anything?”

“I’m feeling sick, is it okay if we arrange our date for another night?”

“I’m not sure if they’re a secret admirer or a stalker….”

“Well… they don’t know I’m going out with you so we’re going to have a girls night sitting in and cry about being single…”

“I’ve got the lube and strawberries, we’re all set!”

“I got out the whipped cream and she slammed the door in my face.”

“I am not wearing that.”

“When he said he would give me a pearl necklace, I thought I was getting actual jewelry.”

“It would have been a lot more romantic if you de-thorned the rose before you put it in your mouth…”

“I’m all for dressing up… but, how do you wear this?”

“If I see another couple holding hands, I’ll… I’ll-”

“Young love, isn’t it sweet?”

“Who did you get all these roses for?”

“I don’t love you, I’m just here for the chocolate.”

“So, let me get this right, you want me to be a stand in to make the person you like jealous?”

“Valentines? Pft!”

“That’s the least romantic thing anyone has ever said to me…”

“What are you doing? Why are you on one knee? Get up! Get up!”

“My mum gave me a rose because she felt sorry for me.”

“Look, you can buy me all the chocolates in the world, I still won’t go out with you.”

“A diamond ring? I appreciate the offer… but don’t you think this is a bit… excessive?”

[rivsmusesarchive]

tewwor‌:

It’s alright. Same two words that enacted the same hollow feeling within him. The bottom edge of the glass rested against the tabletop, and his eyes followed the how the liquid sloshed around. Griffin doesn’t go to meet the other’s eyes. He couldn’t bring himself to. Both of them had been deeply impacted by Bas’s departure, and it’s been nothing but a struggle to keep himself afloat. Thankfully Florian’s been kind- still hurting, but stuck by him through the pain and misery. 

At least it was just a breakup instead of a death. That’s what he’s been trying to convince himself of, at least. 

The pad of his thumb pressed and smoothed over the rim of his drink. He knew he could say anything, semi-believable or not, and Florian would see through it. So, for once, he saved his breath and chose to let out a small sigh instead; one that barely showed the depths of how heavy he felt on the inside. 

“It’s raining, shoulder hurts..” The same shoulder that flared in pain due to the damage Bas had done back in the day. The source of the story wasn’t a secret in this household. So he assumed that his reason for saying those things were implied, because he sure as hell couldn’t mutter three simple words. He couldn’t get past the knot in his throat and heart, and admit that he fucking missed Bas more than that bastard probably missed him. 

         The truth is that Florian’s been running out of things to say, both to everyone else and Griffin, him especially. There’s only so many times that you can get out of a conversation that you really don’t want to have, mostly because you have no idea how to handle it. Florian doesn’t know how he feels about the whole thing himself so he doesn’t know how to talk about it. He should, though. He should have it figured out so he can be the responsible one, like he always is. This responsibility is turning out to be too much for him, apparently. Damn Bas for not keeping him in the dark, too. If he didn’t tell Griff then why the hell did he have to tell him?

         He exhales, loud and heavy and downs his drink. The words still don’t come and he grows frustrated, mostly with himself. It’s like a part of his brain’s just shut off and won’t let him even think about it and he has to— he has to, for himself, for Griff. They’re miserable. Florian’s trying but he’s not sure how it’s supposed to work out in the long run.

         “Do you want something for the pain?” Florian finally asks; he gets up from his chair to go and get more booze. When he grabs the bottle to pour himself another drink he stops and brings the bottle to the table — he’s not sure what’s that supposed to mean, it just seems like they might take a while. And if in silence, then so be it. Or maybe one of them is gonna start talking. 

         He sits back down and pours way too much whisky into his glass — an amount that you never normally see him with. He tells himself it’s gonna help (it probably won’t) because he feels like he needs an excuse. Florian debates on whether he should, or wants to, say anything else but his mind blanks again so he just stars at his hands wrapped around his drink.

[rivsmusesarchive]

RULES: tag followers you want to know better!

TAGGED BY: stole it, cant believe the person that loves me the most @tewwor​ didn’t tag me

TAGGING: @honeyedhowl​ @waveofthehand​ bc thats how many friends i got

NAME: river, riv, rivs, take ur pick STAR SIGN:  leo sun, aquarius moon which i think is a p snazzy combo HEIGHT: 5′6″ and hating it WHAT’S YOUR MIDDLE NAME? jacob

PUT YOUR ITUNES ON SHUFFLE. WHAT ARE THE FIRST 6 SONGS THAT POPPED UP?

my guardian angel - jim breedlove / rags to riches - jack wilson / sweet creature - harry styles / modest - isaiah rashad / heavy gloom - the story so far / give my regards to broadway  - billy murray

EVER HAD A POEM OR SONG WRITTEN ABOUT YOU? oh yeah, me an my two hs friends used to write poetry together all the time, about each other too

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU PLAYED AIR GUITAR? long ass time ago man

WHO IS YOUR CELEBRITY CRUSH? do wrestlers count?? then finn balor

WHAT’S A SOUND YOU HATE; SOUND YOU LOVE? Hate: generally like tv or music being too loud (which doesn’t necessarily mean loud, just too loud for me, im v iffy ab that), drilling, for someone who likes all things handy like that, i hate the sound that a drill makes Love: early morning sounds, ya know, soft wind and birds, thats the shit

DO YOU BELIEVE IN GHOSTS?

oh hell ye

HOW ABOUT ALIENS?

y ea h

DO YOU DRIVE?

nah. i drove once in circles on a parking lot bc my dad took me to show me how to drive and i was going to get a license but then i got la zy

IF SO, HAVE YOU EVER CRASHED?

nah

WHAT WAS THE LAST BOOK YOU READ?

probably a book for my lit exam. probably poetry. but i read like 6 poetry books on the day of my exam so i got no idea which one was the last.

DO YOU LIKE THE SMELL OF GASOLINE?

not really

WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE YOU SAW?

.......................madagascar bc i wanted something non-demanding before bed

WHAT’S THE WORST INJURY YOU’VE EVER HAD?

broke my ankle two years ago

DO YOU HAVE ANY OBSESSIONS RIGHT NOW?

the new far cry game!! im watching like three different gameplays simultaneously 

DO YOU TEND TO HOLD GRUDGES AGAINST PEOPLE WHO HAVE DONE YOU WRONG? not really??? shit  irks me or i drop people but i dont really hold grudges

IN A RELATIONSHIP?

lmao no

[rivsmusesarchive]

tewwor‌:

He, for one, was a light sleeper. Always has been and always will be. It was, at times, annoying to be woken up for little to no reason, but the habit had saved his skin plenty of times in the past. Now, though, he was roused to the feeling of the mattress dip under another weight. If he hadn’t fallen into this routine then he would’ve been on guard instantly. The only thing Daniel did, though, was let Lachlan get close to him without a single peep. 

An arm was wrapped around the one that side around his middle, but he kept his eyes closed. “It’s late.” He knew that it was useless to state the obvious, but the implication of what he assumed was clear in the tone of his voice; tired and concerned, but still soft. 

         “Sorry. Got held up,” Lachlan mutters; technically he’s not lying, he’s just not saying the entire truth. He’s sure that he’s gonna have to explain himself sooner or later, he’s hoping it’s going to be later because he’s tired and the pain is getting worse for some reason, as if the painkillers are not actually working. It means that falling asleep is not going to come easy to him — unless he gets up to get more pills. Or get a drink. Or maybe even both. But right now he can’t bring himself to even move an inch, let alone get out of bed. 

          Lachlan grabs hold of Dan’s hand and laces their fingers together. He presses a kiss to the back of his neck and closes his eyes again — helps to fight through the pain in his ribs and the stinging on his face (thank God Dan’s not facing him). “Maybe I should pass out on the couch next time. Won’t wake you up,” he says, there’s a hint of a smile on hi slips. Lachlan probably says it in a way that suggests that he’d just rather get out of any explaining of his late-night returns rather than saving Dan from having to unnecessarily wake up in the middle of the night. And then he figures that sleeping on the couch would probably call for more explaining than just this.  He’s gonna have to do that — sooner or later, right.

[rivsmusesarchive]

“You’ll always be safe with me.” -Ed<3

@waveofthehand 

          “Is that right?” Lachlan says quietly; he blinks his eyes a couple of times because he’s on the verge of falling asleep. He’s lost track of whatever was on the TV, some kind of a World War II documentary that he’s put on but didn’t really care for. He was tired so he laid down, head in Ed’s lap — he couldn’t bring himself to care about the fact that maybe he shouldn’t be doing that; being so close, acting like this — so intimate. He still doesn’t really know where they stand. But Lachlan doesn’t care. Not right now. 

         “Hope that doesn’t mean you’re taking another bullet for me,” he adds; he lifts his hand and puts it in front of his face, on Ed’s knee. He takes a deep breath and the exhales, eyes closing for a long moment. When he opens them back up he tries to focus on the screen but it doesn’t really work. “I mean it.”

[rivsmusesarchive]

— so i’m currently working on a crime multi which i have been putting off for literal months (it’s been at least a year in the making, with the character concept & lore i’ve been figuring out) and i’m finally doing it. don’t know how long it’s gonna take and it’ probs gonna be an eternal work in progress but as soon as i’m gonna have the basic stuff down in there i’m gonna drop the link

[rivsmusesarchive]

— we’re snooping your playlist. put your writing playlist on shuffle & list the first ten songs, then choose ten victims (repost, don’t reblog).

here’s the thing — I DON’T HAVE A WRITING PLAYLIST. i have like one in my spotify for a character i write like once a year but that’s it. i usually just listen to whatever playlist/album i’m currently obsessed with, lately it’s my go-to acoustic punk playlist on spoitfy. so y’all r getting a glimpse into the music ive got on my phone.

If I could turn back time — Cher

Beach Baby — Bon Iver

Make Believe — Toto

Ruby — Twenty One Pilots

Hit The Road — The Andrews Sisters

GB Eating GB Whilst Listening To GB — Crywank

Don’t Lose Touch — Against Me!

Cavalier Eternel — Against Me!

The Supply of Power (la la la) — The Front Bottoms

Be Good or Be Gone — Fionn Regan

tagged by: @honeyedhowl (thank u bby) tagging: @tewwor, @waveofthehand, @oraclespath + anyone who wants to play!!

[tewwor-archived]

                                                           “I am not led, I lead.”

                                             independent & selective crime mumu

                                       scribbled by ro -rules . muses . open starters

[naazyalensky]

Pod Squad ||| 1.05

“It’s okay. We’re here, we got you. We’re not gonna let anything bad happen to you.”

[rivsmusesarchive]

starter for @tewwor bc ur r00de

        He’s hurt — mildly, but still hurt. Lachlan’s ribs are a mix of yellow and purple  from the fall he took and there’s small cuts and scratches on the left side of his face, from another fall where his head hit the ground. Everything’s been looked at and patched up and Lachlan was sent home with a number of pills in his system to numb the pain in his middle.

         He slips into the bedroom quietly, taking his clothes off with making as little noise as possible. With bare feet padding on the floor, he walks over to the bed and slips under the covers. The part of his brain that told him to keep really quiet when walking in is now telling him to just lay down, close his eyes and try to fall asleep but then there’s the other half of his brain that’s telling his body it’s starved for touch, the one that seems to be winning. So Lachlan turns himself to lay on his side, gritting his teeth and breathing heavily as he does, shifting his body to lay close to Dan, as close as he can get without making it even more obvious that he’s hurt. Lachlan puts an arm around the other’s middle and leans his forehead against the back of Dan’s neck, eyes closed and trying to bring his breathing down to normal. 

[tewwor-archived]

“‘prompts: 1) things you said at 1 am 2) things you said through your teeth 3) things you said too quietly 4) things you said over the phone 5) things you didn’t say at all 6) things you said under the stars and in the grass 7) things you said while we were driving 8) things you said when you were crying 9) things you said when I was crying 10) things you said that made me feel like shit 11) things you said when you were drunk 12) things you said when you thought I was asleep 13) things you said at the kitchen table 14)things you said after you kissed me 15) things you said with too many miles between us 16) things you said with no space between us 17) things you said that I wish you hadn’t 18) things you said when you were scared 19) things you said when we were the happiest we ever were 20) things you said that I wasn’t meant to hear 21) things you said when we were on top of the world 22) things you said after it was over 23) things you said on the streetcar at 1 am 24) things you said with clenched fists 25) things you said in the back seat of a cab 26) things you said sitting still 27) things you said on the phone at 4 am 28) things you said but not out loud 29) things you said in the backyard at night 30) things you said on the highway 31) things you said while I cried in your arms 32) things you said I wouldn’t understand 33) things you said at the back of the theatre 34) things you said in your sleep 35) things you said that made me feel real 36) things you said you’ll never forget 37) things you said with the tv on mute 38)things you said while holding my hand’ 39) things you said when we first met 40) things you said when you met my parents 41) things you said you loved about me 42) things you said when you asked me to marry you 43) things you said in our vows 44) things you said before you kissed me 45) things you said on new year’s eve 46) things you said when you kissed me goodnight 47) things you said in a hotel room 48) things you said on our honeymoon 49) things you said when we were 18 50) things you said when we were 70 51) things you said as we danced in our socks 52) things you said with my lips on your neck 53) things you said in the dark 54) things you always meant to say but never got the chance 55) things you said under your breath 56) things you said in the spur of the moment 57) things you said when no one else was around 58) things you were afraid to say 59) things you said after we fell in love 60) things you said [make your own]”

—

the ones with single quotes aren’t mine, but the rest are. great story and fic prompts

reblog if you want your followers to send you a number and pairing to write a fic about

(via droppingpetals)