——⋆ it’s time for change、
Admittedly, throwing himself into routine is an easy way of distraction, albeit never a healthy one.
It may be a non-promotional period for PER_SE now, while their sister group at NOVA has their comeback – one which Huidong will be watching closely, and supporting all the way, as he always has – but it’s expected of them to still spend nearly half the week on practice at the company building, whether it be NOVA or at Seocho. And in the midst of it all, perhaps he will have some time to convince Manager Jina to let him and the boys show some public support for AND*ROMA, whether it be sending a food truck to a broadcast station, or popping in with some food and drink for the girls and staff alike while they wait for their turn to perform on music shows; he knows how long those days can be.
Huidong has maybe been at the NOVA building above the minimum expected hours and days, since they finished up promoting ‘O Sole Mio’. He still makes time to spend evenings with his fiancee and aunt – time which is precious and important to him, made even more special due to restrictions that come into place once comeback preparations come into swing – but outside of that and some social life catch ups here and there, his time was spent practicing, either with his members or alone. He was sure some of the other PER_SE members were turning to practice as a distraction too, and he couldn’t blame them. The focus on a task at hand took away the glaring absence of someone close to them all, if only temporary.
That doesn’t excuse his inability to acquaint himself with newer additions to the company since his debut though, and it truly is a poor skill of his that he doesn’t necessarily have a valid reason for. But, it seems he manages to make himself a hard contact to find for trainees, as he doesn’t often venture around the hallways and into new areas, especially overly crowded spaces. He much prefers quieter rooms, and he’s gotten rather well at figuring which are the least occupied, but in the instances he has to wander into high traffic spaces, brief glimpses of him can be had before he disappears again.
He should take a break – a proper break – he thinks to himself as he quickly and silently ducks through cafeteria for a small sandwich and Diet Coke, in and out before anyone has properly spotted and recognised him. He walks much slower on the way back though, deciding it will count enough as a ‘proper break’ if he takes longer on the return. An unfamiliar young man bows at him as they cross paths, and Huidong dips his head in an automatic gesture, returning the greeting with an additional nod of his head. The first thing he notices is how tall the other is when he stands upright again. Ah, to be young and have been blessed …
He should try to improve that ‘making acquaintances’ thing while he’s taking a ‘proper break’ too. Small talk is usually the first step, isn’t it?
“Eumm~ … Meal time already, iss it?”
Taeyang finds that he has a hard time imagining how it’s like to be an actual idol, as someone who has hardly even grown accustomed to trainee life during these past eight months, the thought is simply unfathomable—although, to be fair, the reason behind his slow adjustments have nothing to do with the actual schedule or new life style, per se, but it has everything to do with… well, anything else. Not to mention the fact that he practically stumbled into this new career path, initially having dreamt of opening his own gym. Heck, he even studied for four years to make that dream come true; he only just delivered his bachelor thesis earlier this spring, and that’s in addition to taking a course online to gain the title of a personal trainer. Honestly, he was determined.
Then NOVA Entertainment happened.
Sure enough, he wouldn’t have signed the contract back in November if he had absolutely no interest in standing on stage, but that’s not to say that the decision was made on the whim. Taeyang was given an opportunity and before he thought it properly through, he grabbed it wholeheartedly. It wasn’t until he began training and when he began facing personal issues that he started to question his choices thus far, whether becoming an idol was something that he truly wanted or if that was something that might simply be a passing hunger for a new experience. Not that he has had time to think about these things, though, because his personal life has been chaotic for the duration of this year—it has been incredibly overwhelming, to say the least.
As if finishing a four-year bachelor wasn’t stressful enough when trying to get used to the schedule of an idol trainee, Taeyang decided to move housing locations. He decided to break up with the love of his life, despite wanting nothing more than to be by her side, and that’s after opening the wound about the parents that he was never able to meet. Having spiralled down into depression and self-loathing, Taeyang foolishly pushed his friends aside also. At the end of the day, he wonders whether this is all going to be worth it because right now, he isn’t so sure that it will. Though times are seemingly better now, and he has evidently managed to get his girlfriend back despite stupidly showing her the door, he must realise that he needs time to heal from everything.
One does not simply get better with the snap of one’s fingers.
Now, he hides his distress rather well when in the company building, though, so he smiles at Huidong when spoken to—it’s safe to say that Taeyang welcomes conversation, gladly, both to keep his mind elsewhere and to actually make new acquaintances. “Yeah… seems like it. I almost forgot all about it.” A blatant lie, because his appetite is incredibly high, but a white lie doesn’t hurt anyone. So, what does he say next, then? Suddenly Taeyang appears awkward, the other’s presence somewhat intimidating. Of course, he tends to the obvious subject. “I saw your collaboration with 1MILLION, by the way. It’s a good one.” He hopes to bond over their shared passion, dancing.
