I don’t know what the fuck is inside my head, is there anything at all? if so please take it out it’s no good

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@rollinginthedeepdepression
I don’t know what the fuck is inside my head, is there anything at all? if so please take it out it’s no good
every year I wonder “will this be my last?”
I’m really gonna die alone huh
anyone else lose their youth to depression haha
how do you make a serious cry for help when you’ve already been making them your whole life
The problem with having mental illnesses since being a child is that your whole identity grew around them and you have no idea who you really are.
I’m sick of joking around about “yearning” and “haha ima be alone forever” and “damn I wish someone would love me like that lmao” I fucking MEAN it when I say I’m so goddamn lonely and desperate for romantic love and I am SICK OF IT!!
I want to date someone!!! I want to know what it’s like to be fucking loved romantically!!!! I want someone to look at me like I’m the most beautiful thing they’ve ever seen!!! I want someone to TELL me I’m the most beautiful thing they’ve ever seen!!! I want someone to hug me randomly because they’re in love with me and can’t help it!!! I want to be held and kissed!!!! I am at the point where I don’t even care how long it lasts because I just wanna fucking KNOW!!!
And don’t anyone come at me about how I better be willing to reciprocate all that love and attention because I’ve been waiting so goddamn long to find someone to give everything I have to!!! Y’all best BET i would never leave them tf alone!!!! Y’all I tell my FRIENDS that I would bottle the goddamn stars for them and I MEAN THAT SHIT!!!! Y’all don’t even know what kinda love I could give to someone romantically!!!
I have so much fucking love to give to someone if only they’d just love me too. I’m so tired of waiting and I’m only 19. The worlds falling apart and I just know I’m gonna find myself alone at the end. I’m just asking the universe to show some mercy. Please.
You know what’s really hot? Not having to guess someone’s feelings or intentions
I want to die and it’s not a fucking joke anymore.
whats keeping me up at night