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I Lost It Yesterday Over a Trash Can
It finally happened yesterday. All those little things adding up to finally overflow the bucket of emotions. I don’t really remember when I lost my ability to cry for no good reason. There was a time in my life when I would cry at Hallmark commercials, I would cry in the first 5 minutes of watching the notebook because I knew what was going to happen. Now, my emotions are stuck in the concrete of…
Spilling the Caregiver Tea Room
Turns out you can be a victim of circumstance or you can make circumstance your bitch. I think in every woman’s life (well, maybe there’s a few that this rule does not apply to) there comes a time when she has to leave a toxic relationship. Whether that’s physical abuse or mental abuse, I believe most women have had to walk away from someone or something for the betterment of their mental or…
I mowed the grass yesterday in perfectly straight lines because apparently that’s where I’m at mentally right now. Anyway, I wrote about caregiving, dementia, resentment, peanut butter sandwiches, the cat “running away” every day, and trying not to lose my ever loving shit while also feeling guilty for even thinking that. It’s called “One Long Line at a Time.”
This is My Life Now
I took a trip to Ohio last week to help my daughter with some house chores. Well, Will really was the one helping. He was on a ladder doing some exterior painting. I was actually super tired and pretty useless. Getting away from our “new life” helping take care of Will’s mom and her house (which I guess is technically now also “our” house) has been a very draining and seemingly never-ending task.…
Is it Burnout or am I Disappearing Again?
Yesterday was a super good day. My sister and my mom came over and had lunch with Will’s mom (Martha) and I. Martha has a really nice house that she and her husband built in 2001 when they (she) decided she was tired of moving and even if Bill (her husband) had to travel for work, she was staying put. So she built her dream house and it’s truly gorgeous. Big front porch, formal sitting and dining…
Once Upon a Time in '94
I filed for divorce today. I thought I would be happier about it, but it’s kind of sad. Like a small little death that I knew was coming but didn’t actually think it would ever get here. I got married in 1994. I was barely an adult and he was even younger. We were stupid kids who truly believed that after a month or so, we were in love and were going to spend the rest of our lives together. The…
75 Days and Counting
It’s been 75 Days since we closed the door to the U-Haul in Myrtle Beach and opened it in Knoxville. Seventy-five days of packing, sorting, cleaning, grieving, reacquainting and trying to find a new normal. It’s a weird thing to live in someone else’s house and sort through someone else’s life when they are still alive. It’s even more interesting trying to figure out where you fit into all of…
Rediscovering Knoxville: Memories Without GPS
We survived the Tennessee snowpocalypse 2026 and I finally got out today and braved the roads which have pretty much melted on the main roads and highways. Some of the side roads are still shit, but that’s to be expected considering it’s refusing to get above freezing. It’s supposed to be close to 50 tomorrow and rainy. So that will most likely melt all the snow and then turn everything into mud.…
Embracing Change: Our New Home in Tennessee
We just passed our one week mark of “officially” being Tennesseans again. Things have been moving along slower than I would have liked. If you read the last blog, you know what a tremendous mess we walked into when we got here. Well, we had a lot of it cleaned up before we actually moved here, but there was still (and is still) a LOT to do. We painted the room that will be our office space this…
Ch..Ch...Ch..Ch..Changes....
My brother in law, B, died and now I live in Knoxville again. This is probably going to be a long one to get you all caught up. If you’ve been around for a while, you were probably aware that Will’s brother came to live with us for a bit in 2019. We found him near death in his apartment, green from a failing liver. After he got out of the hospital he lived with us for a few months, I think, then…
I'm Back and Older than Ever
In typical Angie fashion, I was rearranging my house and broke my computer monitor. I do have a laptop, and I do have a phone, so I am probably just making excuses as to why I haven’t blogged in a bit, but I just prefer using a desktop for a lot of the things I do, including blogging. I like two handed typing and I like seeing the words on a big screen. Maybe it’s because as I age, I truly can’t…
Oddities and Other People's Sticks
I have a shelf of oddities at my house. I’ve collected them over the years—small curiosities I’ve stumbled across and thought were worth keeping. They aren’t sacred, exactly, but every time I walk by, I take a peek and feel a little spark of happiness just knowing they’re there. Some pieces I remember vividly—where they came from, why I held onto them. Others are simply old, strange, or cool…
What Nobody Tells You About Being an Empty Nester (Especially If You Were a Teen Mom)
When my last kid moved out, I didn’t cry right away. I walked back inside my house, looked around at the quiet, and thought, “This is fine. I’ve been preparing for this.” Nobody tells you that the quiet doesn’t always feel like peace. Sometimes it feels like the aftershock of an earthquake—your house is still standing, but everything inside you is slightly off-center. I didn’t grow up and then…
Cheese, Chocolate, and Other Poor Life Choices
It’s Wednesday and I woke up, took the trash and the recycling to the recycling center, stopped at the gas station, and found myself singing in the car on my way home. Normally, this wouldn’t strike me as odd, but over the last two months or close to it, I’ve been physically miserable. I went to the ER twice. Once because I had chest pressure and this “full” feeling that after a bunch of upper…
The Resolution to Every Quarrel Starts With Me
Families fight. If they didn’t, would they even really be family? Sometimes, you can get over it. And other times, it breaks something. I’ve gotten into more than one fight with more than one family member. I have two aunts who I don’t talk to and probably never will. Most recently, it was a fight with a sibling…over this blog. They think my truth is a lie and that’s ok, because their truth is…
The Pot at the End of the Month
Beans. Growing up, I hated them. For me, beans weren’t just beans. They were power, poverty, and punishment in a pot. I didn’t like black beans, lima beans, or kidney beans, and I detested chili because chili usually had more than one kind of bean in it, and one kind was bad enough. I’ve always blamed my aversion to beans on my mother’s “goupla,” her specialty end of the month dish. A small…
Why Losing My Religion Made Me a Better Person
The prompt for today was to describe what brought me closer or further away from my religious devotions. I don’t think I ever really had any religious devotions. My mom sent all of us to a Catholic school in my late elementary, early middle school years. We went on scholarship because we were living well below the poverty line. I don’t really think I knew that back then. All I really knew is…