Reasons other batkids are in Jason’s apartment
Jason: “Did you… is that… Did you eat the ENTIRE THING?”
Dick: “In my defense Alfred has been gone a week.”
Jason: “Why did you need my help with this again?”
Damian: “Grayson would insist on retaining photographic evidence, Gordon would take too long, Cain and Brown are not in the country, and Drake is an idiot.”
Jason: “You do realize Tim is like, a genius, right?”
Damian: “Tt. Debatable, seeing how Drake failed to complete high school.”
Jason: “Right… You know when you said you needed help I thought you meant with hiding a body or something, not…” *gestures vaguely to Damian’s unfinished science diorama*
Steph: “Ugh. Why is this so hard? It’s not like this is even the first gala I’ve been dragged to.”
Jason: “Why do I need to pick?”
Steph: “Apprently I need to ‘expand my color palette’ or something.”
Jason: “Doesn’t really explain why me.”
Steph: *sighs* “Have you SEEN what Dick and Tim consider acceptable clothing choices?”
Steph: “Damian is an obvious no seeing as I’m not actually a masochist, And Cass is out of town.”
Jason: “Why am I always second to Cass?”
Steph: “EVERYONE is second to Cass.”
Jason: “Fair. What about Babs?”
Steph: “Just shut up and help me pick a dress, boy zombie.”
Jason: “Whatever, Blondie.”
(Cass, dropping off half a dozen nerf guns)
Cass: “They’re being annoying.”
Tim: “I need help hiding a body.”
Tim: “What? I didn’t kill him.”
Jason: “Somehow that is so much worse.”
Tim: “Oh, don’t worry, he’s dead.”
Tim: “I just need to hide it somewhere for a few weeks.”
Jason: *watching a video feed of an increasingly paranoid Lex Luthor*
Jason: “I don’t even want to know.”
Babs: “I need your help finding a body.”
Jason: *mentally cursing Tim*
Bruce: *breaking down* “I can’t take it anymore.”
Jason: “How is this my problem?”
Bruce: “They just won’t STOP.”
Jason: “You do realize you chose to have this many kids, right?”
Bruce: “Where did they even GET Green Lantern themed batarangs?”
Jason: “Fine. You can take the couch.”