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[eating-marbles]

a love letter to me

when I smile and my eyes are basically closed and my head tilts back or towards whoever I'm standing next to & when I'm alone in my room I sing the songs I'm listening to & how I sneakily clean my roommate's dishes and fill her brita filter & my instagram (it sounds shallow but it makes me so happy to look back at all the times I've been happy in the past year) & how I can't handle caffeine at all & the wall above my desk that has little artifacts from friends & the box that sits in the bottom drawer of my desk that holds cards and receipts and other special items worth saving & my nintendo switch that I only play animal crossing on (and only every few months) & the many minion themed items around my room & the books on my shelf that I never read & when I climb up into my bed, it saps so much of my energy that sometimes I just flop onto the rest and hope the rest of my body makes it & my many green shirts & whenever I wear my socks with labradors in science coats, I always show people my socks because "SCIENCE LAB" & when I watch movies, I almost always write my letterboxd review in the middle of it so I don't forget the funny things I think & the way I walk when I'm happy or have energy & when I lie for no reason about when I went to sleep (but the reason is actually because I don't want my friends, who know my sleep schedule is bad, to know my sleep schedule is bad) & the two cat paintings next to my bed & how much I love the beads on my shoes & fiddling with the safety pin on my belt loops or the wodden alligator and rubber sakura keychain on my purse & collecting bottles and rocks & the tally that marks how many times I've hit my head on my bed or the ceiling that's nearing 40 & my "daily tunes" playlist that I add a song to every day & being so horrible at phone calls and leaving voicemails that it makes me laugh & how my room's cleanliness comes and goes on a weekly cycle & still telling people I read as a hobby when I barely do & my lemon mug & the headshot doodles I do & the little cats I draw & the love letters I wrote for each of my friends & when I wash my blanket, I love how it smells & how i don't feel bad anymore about having a samsung phone (it was a slow acceptance, hindered by not so cool friends) & the "he pulls out" munger in my phone case (thanks rai) & even though I don't really like scrambled eggs, I still eat them at breakfast because the potatoes are always so salty & how when I have to do something scary, I tell myself that it'll be my one brave thing of the day and I don't have to do any other scare things after that (but the cool thing about bravery is that once you do one scary thing, you can do the other scary things too) & how adorable I am when I do pigtail braids & when I do my eyeliner & how sometimes when I'm in a good mood and walking somewhere, I'll accidentally skip a little and have to stop myself from skipping more & when I record stories on instagram, I always mess up my story a few times and keep re-recording it & my flow free daily puzzle streak (it's at 134 days so far) & when it's late and I set an alarm so I can take a small nap before getting ready for bed but always end up falling asleep & when I wrap myself up in my blanket so it looks like I choke myself in my sleep & when I wash my blanket, it smells so good (like home detergent, which is just home) & the only fruit I eat at the dlg is the cantaloupe because I love cantaloupe and I rarely have it at home & my spotify playlists & how adorable my es 40 presentation was & how happy writing this makes me because sometimes I feel bad about myself but this makes me feel really good

[s1r3n-slacks]

I genuinely got so sad this blog died, made me happy to be alive. mutuals, normalize writing love letters to yourself. also i love the one scary thing of the day 100 percent will use

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

if I wrote a dystopian novel where the corrupt evil megacorporation that controls society has a fucking smirk for a logo, my editor would tell me to use a less heavy-handed metaphor

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

and yet

[twinkiefairy]

I love this because if I were to write a literary novel in the Western cannon that described the image of an apple with a chunk bitten off, any high school English student would tell you it is a Bible reference meant to represent the source of all evil and downfall of humanity and YET 

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

[s1r3n-slacks]

Today I discovered that melting ice makes a sound— it cracks, pops, fizzes and hisses like demonic Rice Krispies. Apparently it has to do with pressurized air bubbles and fractures from expansion, but this leads to a question which National Geographic already answered for me:

Which is similarly heavy handed but also extremely freaking metal

[s1r3n-slacks]

god bless you kazimierz dąbrowski

[s1r3n-slacks]

i feel like cassandra with my horrible visions (protein-powder cookie dough sandwich in keto bread)

unfortunately I have the funniest mental disorder

[111111111yeah]

my dinner-centric world view

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

we gotta get back into revolving bookcases i'm begging

truly we allow the pinnacles of human achievement to wither and collapse into ashes in the wind

[fullmetalfisting]

Tbh germ theory DOES sound crazy. Like if you told a regency-era nobleman that tiny creatures lived on the surface of everything and THAT’S what causes consumption, they’d be like “ah, I see you are a lunatic. Would you reside in my hermitage? Rantings and ravings do so amuse my guests”

[mysteryteacup]

But if you told a Medieval person this they would probably go "Ah, so when the miasma settles on surfaces it gains evil life. I understand."

[alarajrogers]

Yeah, actually, it would probably be pretty easy to explain germ theory to a Medieval person as tiny evil spirits that live on everything, but they can be purified by soap and water, or by alcohol, because that is why God has granted us those things. And because they can float in the air, if you cough or sneeze after they have infested you, that can cause them to infest others. And when you are sick, the angels God has deputized to defend the bodies of His beloved children are at war with the evil spirits, and, sadly, sometimes they lose, but the best way to help your angels win their battle is to rest, drink plenty (this would probably be small beer in this time period, not water, because the water was also infested), stay clean, and for the sake of God do not allow anyone to let your blood, for the angels need that blood in their war against the evil spirits. Bloodletting is good for some types of illnesses but not the kinds caused by the tiny evil spirits.

[chekhovs-raygun]

boiling as a sterilization measure is also easy to explain. water returns to the air when heated and it rises as steam back up to the floodgates of heaven; we know God created the world in seven days, He's not up there making more water every time it rains. it circulates. the returning of water to heaven also purifies the water of unclean and malign influences. you know wormy water from a muddy puddle will kill your kid. you know you wouldn't wade into a bog and have a slurp. water that remains in the low places of earth absorbs all that is unclean from our waste and it may also sponge up new diseases from hell, we're not totally sure about that one, but it seems likely. God set up the heavenly water cycle so that the earth's waters wouldn't totally fill up with gunk.

what does this have to do with boiling your surgical tools? well look, the boiling water releases bubbles of steam which carries the malign influences up to heaven. you boil a knife, you send all the miasmic particles off with the steam to heaven. if you rinse the knife off in a bucket the water isn't hot enough, the particles go into the water and then right back on to the knife. you gotta boil it to get the particles all the way away. how can a tool or rag or a bed have miasmic particles on it when you can't smell them? humans have a lousy sense of smell. look at your dog on the hunt. are there no rabbits in the woods just because you can't smell them? we know that miasma is carried on the air, and is what makes stench so dangerous, and we know that humans can't smell worth a damn compared to dogs cats horses etc. a dog can smell if a rat died in a corner of the room last week. you can't. do you think licking the spot where the rat died is going to go well for you? luckily, what humans lack in snout we make up for in brains. we have extra brains where our sniffers should have been. God set that up for a reason.

and why does a rinse with wine spirits work? man, look how fast alcohol evaporates. my guess is that because wine contains a lot more vice than water, it evaporates a whole lot faster, in sort of an equal and opposite way that a rock falls faster than a feather. if you want the miasmic particles to get off there FAST, you dunk it in something that's going back to heaven at a gallop.

what's up with honey? it just preserves things against corruption. doesn't clean them off. honey doesn't evaporate at all. probably because bees don't sin. it's not good for ridding a tool of particles-- it's sticky-- but fine for preserving anything you don't want to go to heaven OR hell. this is why you wash the wound with wine spirits or purified water FIRST, to sluice the miasma out, then slap the honey on AFTER. and boil the damn bandage, too. you wouldn't put a rotten door in a sound doorframe and expect it to keep out bandits, would you? cmon.

[s1r3n-slacks]

Making the strange familiar and the familiar strange!

[apatheticfluorescence]

some hyper famous artists like Van Gogh transcend overratedness and become underrated because they're so normalized. Like I'll look at a van Gogh and I'm like wait this really is amazing you guys don't get it

[headspace-hotel]

Shakespeare is like this

[zooophagous]

Pouring cocaine onto a mirror and using a tiny zen garden rake to make decorative soothing swirls in it

[s1r3n-slacks]

You’re so pretty, do you think I could get your LinkedIn username?

[junkdrawertales]

on the topic of the Met Gala I think more museums should have high fashion galas. where’s the MOMA Gala. the LACMA Gala. Monterey Bay Aquarium Gala

[s1r3n-slacks]

JELLYFISH DRESS

[s1r3n-slacks]

But not for celebrities like for people who have made substantial contributions in the field either scientific or through conservation etc

[junkdrawertales]

on the topic of the Met Gala I think more museums should have high fashion galas. where’s the MOMA Gala. the LACMA Gala. Monterey Bay Aquarium Gala

[s1r3n-slacks]

JELLYFISH DRESS

[sunflower-eddiediaz]

boobs should have a toggle on/off feature

[tpwrtrmnky]

humans should be able to do a special Ultra Sleep after major life accomplishments where you're just out for like 32 hours or something and then you wake up fully refreshed in every way

[free-my-mindd]

[s1r3n-slacks]

it’s literally me and my glitter gel pens against the world

[starrynet]