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@sacredfiend
I actually do think we should discourage women from becoming housewives. Do not become financially dependent on a man. That's how a lot of women ended up dead over the years. A man gets violent suddenly and you have to choose between homelessness or potentially dying at his hand because you have an enormous gap in your resume and no degrees or certifications or anything that will help you pursue a career that will allow you to be financially independent. He owns your bank account. His name is probably the one on the car. Try and leave and he can report it stolen. Where will you go then?
Don't become a housewife.
And if you do become a housewife, take steps to protect yourself. Make sure you’re legally married, for starters; stay-at-home girlfriends have very little legal recourse to claim their partner’s assets in a breakup. Make sure your name is on the house deed/rental agreement, and have your car in your name, even if your spouse is paying for it. Have your spouse transfer money every month into an account solely in your name, so you can buy yourself things without needing permission, but also so you can save up to leave if needed.
If your spouse fights you on any of this, then don’t quit your job. The tradwife to poverty pipeline is real, and so is financial abuse.
also, many women/people experience controlling behaviour and domestic violence from their partner for the first time during pregnancy. don’t risk thinking “he’s just stressed, it’ll get better when the baby comes” because it won’t. neither you and your child will ever be safe with that man. get out as early and safely as you can
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Captured U.S. pilot major Dewey Waddell is guarded by a militiawoman with a gun and a bayonet on a rice field. Vietnam, 1967.
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Hello, my name is Saja. I’m a mother to a beautiful 8-month-old baby girl, writing this from a place I never imagined I’d be — surrounded by destruction, holding on to my daughter while the world around us falls apart. 💔
We used to have a home. 🏚 A simple place, but it was filled with love. Now it’s gone. What remains are memories, silence, and an overwhelming fear of what tomorrow may bring.
Each day, I wake up not knowing if we will make it through the next. My daughter should be learning to walk, to smile at strangers, to feel safe in her world — but instead, she’s learning to live in the middle of a war zone. 🕊️
I’m not writing this to ask for pity. I’m sharing our truth because silence won’t protect us. Maybe, through this message, someone will hear us — and care. 🤍
If you feel moved to share our story or offer support, it would mean more than words can say. Every kind act ripples outward. ✨
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Thank you for taking a moment to listen. 🙏
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