Hi there, you may refer to me as Sacro. I made this blog to practice my writing, and also as a way to feel more comfortable with the idea of sharing it. I hope you find any of my works enjoyable.
I like analyzing characters and making up headcannons and short stories (this is a x reader blog) . My fandoms are Genshin impact, LADS, and The other Bennet sister
I might take my time to post, but for now my only work available is:
Ayato:
"Ayato has a crush (Headcanons)"
Tartaglia:
"Contemplation (Childe x reader)"
"About Tartaglia and Nod krai's market event (Childe x reader)"
"Tartaglia with a S/O who doesn't fight"
Please do not copy or repost. Thank u for your stay ( 𖦹 ´ v ` 𖦹 )!
Assuming you’re in a romantic relationship (married). You guys live together. Scenarios differ. I want to say most of these take place in teyvat. Pet names used (Tighnari). The diary looks like a normal book from the outside.
Author’s notes: This is how I think each character would react. I apologize if it’s a little OOC. Haven’t posted in a while so I hope this was worth the wait. Interactions appreciated.
Scrambles
Tighnari noticed a new book he hadn’t seen before on the floor outside your house. It didn’t have a cover he recognized so he opened it just to see who it belonged to. It only took a moment for him to immediately recognize your handwriting and accidentally read something from about himself from before you guys were together. You came up from behind him just before he was about to close it. When you shouted his name he froze. Even his tail went straight. This looked bad. He snapped the book shut before swivelling. He’d never disrupt your privacy and he didn’t want you thinking he goes through your things when you’re not around . “S-sweetheart? Uh this isn’t what it looks like. I found it on the floor and…” Tighnari would quickly explain. He tries to forget anything he read since he knows he wasn’t supposed to know. He’d only mention something if he read something mentally or physically concerning.
Gorou gets bright red as he reads it. He only read a few pages about what you wrote you wanted to do with his ears/tail. He got lost in the read. He didn’t realize it was your diary when he picked it up. He found the book in your dresser and accidentally dropped it. A random page was opened when he grabbed it. If you had a long or back to back entries about him he’ll be reading it for a while. If you don’t catch him he’ll put it exactly where he found it and ‘subtly’ suggest you touch him the way you were thinking in your diary. If you catch him he’ll go through 5 different phases unsure what to do. He’ll jump, hide it behind his back, take it out from behind his back, hold the book tightly and apologize. He’ll confess to what he read and swear he won’t go through your stuff again. He’s slightly panicked. He knows he should know better. If you get upset with him he’ll try his hardest to win your trust back.
Kaveh is more offended by your insult than intrigued by the gushy romantic parts. How could his beloved think of him as a workaholic! He read only a sentence before planning to put it away so that you wouldn’t notice. When you catch him he’ll over explain. He wants you to know that he values your privacy just as much as you value your privacy.
Varka read the first few sentences and thought, “This sounds like a diary,” yet he still didn’t think it was. When he does realize you walk in a second before he could hide the evidence. He almost drops the book and holds it behind his thigh where you can’t see. He’ll ask you what you’d do if you find out that he “hypothetically” read a bit of your diary. When you get understandably upset he apologizes and swears he wouldn’t have read it had he known it was a diary.
Teases
Flins was in his lantern form when you left it wide open in front of him. You were in too much of a rush to notice that you left your diary open on a rather embarrassing page in front of your glowy husband. Later he’ll jokingly ask you about it or reference it in one of his sentences. “I’m rather flattered that you think so fondly of my eyes.” He’ll openly reveal what he read but he wouldn’t pry. He only read what you left open but no more. From then on if he sees your diary anywhere he might ask “I wonder what new lovely descriptions you’ve added about me.” He’ll watch your sheepish expression while setting the book to the side.
Alhaitham doesn’t care that he read it. It was an accident and that’s that. You were the one dumb enough to leave it somewhere anyone could find. He wouldn’t read past the first page. He’d only read a few sentences before realizing. He’d put it away for you afterwards. He’ll mention it within that day though the situation could vary. If you guys are arguing he’ll say something like “You act like you hate me but that doesn’t seem to be the case in that little diary of yours…Relax I didn’t read past the first paragraph.” If it is normal I think he’d casually mention that he put it away for you and read the first few sentences since he didn’t know it was your private journal.
Cyno is used to reading private messages so it is hard for him to feel guilty when he finds out secret information. He tries to give you privacy nonetheless. He saw the book spread wide open with his name on it. He took a closer look to see that you loved to gush over him in your free time. Once you catch him I think he’d make a joke over it. He’d avoid the question about how much he read just to see you blush from embarrassment. After a few minutes though he’d tell you what he read just to bring your heart rate back down.
Heizou is the teaser. He picked up the book since he hadn’t seen it before. Opened it to a random page and knew it was your diary after reading less than a sentence. He lets you catch him. He starts naming things in there. He doesn’t need to read it to know what’s inside and he loves watching you flush. If you seem upset he’ll tell you the truth. If you only seem embarrassed he’ll let you go the rest of your life thinking he read every single cringy detail you wrote.
Lohen does not care that he read something private. He accidentally found it but he didn’t accidentally read it. He read the whole book. Had you not caught him he would’ve put it back and check the new entries every once in a while. He’d mention details of things you never told him just to make you feel crazy. When you do catch him he’d stop you from grabbing the book with his hand. “Give me a second I’m still reading about how hot I am.” From that point on he teases you relentlessly about everything he read. If you had an embarrassed reaction he’d keep looking for your diary no matter where you hide it. If you have an angry reaction he wouldn’t read it again but every once in a while you’ll see him quietly chuckling while looking at you.
Wriothesley had assumed someone dropped the book while delivering paperwork since he found it in his office. Read it while sipping his tea and chuckled at what you wrote about him. Only read 2-3 pages. You wouldn’t need to catch him as he would have handed it to you the second you came looking for it while joking about how imaginative or detail oriented you are. If you did walk-in I don’t think he’d try to hide what he was doing. “Just in time. I found this hiding along with my other stacks of work. I admit it’s much more of a pleasurable read.” He’ll only feel bad if he read something dark that he didn’t know about you. Besides that he may jokingly ask you if he could read it after a rough day a few months later.
Guilty/ Feels bad
Bennett would have never touched it had he known it was something so private and important. He read a a few pages before he realized it was your diary. You don’t need to catch him before he goes up to you to confess. He had to anyway. You would have known by the blood from his paper cut on the page anyway. He’ll think fondly though of whatever you wrote but wouldn’t comment on it.
Chongyun can admit he read a little longer than he should have. He wasn’t aware that you were that into him. He tries his hardest to keep his yang energy in check. He jumps when you catch him reading the book. He’ll scramble to explain. He feels super bad about it later even after you forgive him.
Freminet feels extremely bad for reading it. He of all people know how important it is to have a safe space. He read a decent amount even after realizing it was your diary. He’s unsure why. Maybe he wanted to know a bit more about you. Maybe he’d be able to find out why you were so nice to him. He apologizes when you catch him. He feels ashamed over it and self-isolates afterwards so he can gather his thoughts.
Gaming has never been one to ask anyone about something they aren’t willing to share. When he accidentally reads something he shouldn’t have he hisses. He wasn’t sure how he’d bring it up. Just when things couldn’t get any worse you show up into the room and see him reading completely out of context. He quickly explains the whole situation. He even explains the hour leading up to the situation. Swears he won’t mention anything he read. At most he’ll tell you that knowing that you love him so gives him a huge confidence boost.
Itto didn’t realize it was a diary until you told him. He thought you just wrote a book about how much you like him as a surprise. When he does realize he instantly feels guilty.
Kazuha would never read something you didn’t want him to unless he was afraid for your well being. He knew that you wouldn’t have said the things you wrote to his face. Will stop reading mid-sentence. He’d confess even if you didn’t catch him. When you do he leaves no room for misunderstandings. He quickly apologizes. Spends the rest of the day trying to make it up to you.
Neuvillette is still learning things about human culture. He had no idea that this book was so important to you. The book just seemed like records of your daily life. He has heard about cases where criminals document their crimes in their journals but in court that’s all it is. Evidence. He never understood why they’d be so dumb as to write it down. When you frustratingly yell at him for reading it and explain why what he did was wrong he can’t help but feel extremely guilty. He gives you space but he does apologize and tries to tell you that he does honour your privacy.
Venti believes in freedom. A world where no one can have any privacy is a world that he doesn’t want to live in. Even he has his secrets, so he obviously feels ashamed about reading it. Thankfully he only read a little bit about you having a crush on him before you got together but nonetheless he knows he was never meant to see this. He instantly realizes he messed up and is unsure of what he should do when you show up. He’d let you have whatever reaction. If you’re angry he lets you scream at him. If you’re embarrassed he lets you rip the book out of his hand. He’ll then hold his hand against his heart and have a sincere expression as he apologizes.
Scaramouche/Wanderer has a similar reaction to Venti. He has his secrets so he knows how important it is to not pry. He’s frustrated that you walked in on him during such a bad moment. If you immediately start reacting he’ll get even more frustrated at the misunderstanding. He’s not mad at you, only himself for letting his guard down and reading one of your books without knowing what it is. If you give him a moment to explain or have a freeze response then he’ll look at you wide eyed. “Dammit I didn’t mean…” he’ll whisper before getting closer to you to explain what happened. If you get upset he’ll feel guilty until you forgive him. If you forgive him immediately he’ll still feel guilty but will recover a lot quicker. He will also feel unconsciously more affectionate with you knowing that’s how you think of him even when no one would find out if you thought worse.
Baizhu knows how important privacy is for the mental health so he would never read it had it not been an accident. He was tired and thought it was one of his own books. Opened it, read two sentences, then immediately closed it when he realized his mistake. You walked in less than a second later. He didn’t waste any time and explained immediately. Nonetheless he felt bad for invading your privacy. He’ll tell you exactly what he read. He doesn’t even think of the fact that you were writing such gushy stuff about him. Never mentions anything he read again. If he read something physically concerning I think he’d prepare something to help you without telling you or be a little more thorough with his next medical check.
Diluc always has a stack of documents on his desk. When he found it on the floor he thought he had dropped it so he opened it and started reading. Read a paragraph but only because it was about him. If it was about anything else he slapped the book shut the second he realized. Would’ve told you either way but if it wasn’t about him he would’ve told you a lot quicker and with a lot less embarrassment. If you didn’t catch him he would bring it up awkwardly while you guys ate dinner together. He’d rather you not find out from anyone but himself. You catch him with the book in hand when he was trying to put it back where he found it. For a moment you guys just look at each other. He feels bad because he read way more than he should have. He didn’t know you had such good writing skills and vocabulary when you wrote about him. Waits for you to speak first before uncomfortably telling you what happened with a light apology. Unless you ask he won’t tell you what he read. If you do then his face would heat up as he goes over it.
Guilty But Only Because of the Situation
Childe/Tartaglia/Ajax only feels guilty because he upset you. Had you not caught him I don’t think he would’ve admitted it to you that he read it. He realized after the first page that it was your diary but he really liked how much he was learning about you. He learned how you think, how you talk about yourself, what makes you angry or frustrated, and what you adore about him. He loves you so he loves discovering new things about you. He only feels guilty because he hates when you’re upset with him. He won’t go out of his way to read it again but perhaps if you ever leave it open he may glance at what’s written on the page.
Thoma was cleaning when he found it. He was organizing the bookshelf and opened it just to see what type of book it was so he could categorize it accordingly. Opened a random page just to see that you were fan girling over him. He was originally just going to smile and put it away but you walked in on him reading it. He apologizes but I don’t think he feels sorry because he’s pleased with what he read. Had he read one of your deepest, darkest secrets or something else you wanted to hide for good reason I think he’d feel super guilty. I don’t think he would have mentioned it either way to you had you not caught him.
Xinqui found the book barred under a stack of other books you had just lying around. He was interested in what literature you like to read/write so he cracked it open. He was originally going to tease you about what you wrote. He did a little. Up until you got mad. He realizes what he did was stupid and regrets doing it because it was a dumb thing to do. When he read it he only read whatever random pages interested him but didn’t read the whole book.
Doesn’t feel guilty
Razor doesn’t understand why you’re so upset. He can barely read anyways so he didn’t understand half of it. He did get the vibe that you really love him though. Had you not caught him you would’ve still found out because he’d ask you about what something you wrote meant. Since everything is hand written in Teyvat I don’t know if he even recognized your handwriting when he opened the book. He most likely only realized you wrote it after finding out the details were about him. Say you do catch him he doesn’t know why you’re so embarrassed. You’re his mate and mates don’t keep secrets. What does it matter that he found out that you wrote or did something embarrassing?
Characters I didn’t write for
Because I feared mischaracterizing them: Xiao, Zhongli, Albedo, Dahlia, Durin, Ifa, Illuga, Kinich, Mika, Sethos,
Because I just didn’t want to: Lyney, Ayato, Kaeya, Ororon
Anyone else may of came out after this post or I forgot about them (feel free to tell me and I might add them).
Warnings: mentions of tartaglia backstory, slight angst in that way, but it's not the main topic. Do tell me. Not my first language.
just some thoughts I have about his spirit and drive. My requests are always open. Feel free to ask anything.
About his passion…
Tartaglia doesn't care exclusively for fighting. Strength involves many aspects of life; eating, exercise, sleep, habits that keep you in good shape for the field. Naturally, he tries to keep good routines, which leads him to different hobbies.
It'd be a lie to say it's completely out of his pursuit of strength, ever since his fall in the abyss tradition became something he held in a dear place of his heart. Of course it translated to his own ways, but it was a way to feel like he had actually made it back home. Like he was still part of his family, the scenery of them smiling at his fishing catch is much kinder than the memory of them enlisting him to the fatui.
He had learned cooking, being organized and efficient, meditating, fishing, ice sculpting, he'd even learn carpentry if his siblings asked for anything.
He has one or two competitive bones in his body that make him want to always be better, not even at the face of another but of his own skills. He wants to overachieve, he loves the face of surprise on his family and you.
For example, if he cooks he wants to make a better dish next time. The texture could be better, he could try to use an ingredient you wouldn't even have thought of, and he could definitely work around the presentation. Yes… it made him buzz with excitement to think of the look on your face when he presents you with his next piece, maybe you could try it on your visit to his homeland?
When it came to you…
He doesn't quite mind what exactly it is that you are passionate about, but I think he definitely would appreciate you holding something dear to you as well.
Whether it is cooking, painting, singing, or any sort of art or sport, he'd bask on listening to you talk about your findings and your next projects.
He would definitely try any of your hobbies.
If you like cooking, think of his birthday card, he will want to have a competition. Come on, what's a couple of odd ingredients? he will be a fair critic, and you can both enjoy your feast afterward. He likes to cook for you but it's not against you cooking either, just let him make dessert in exchange? He loves good food and he's not a picky eater so he will remember the taste of every dish you have made, and won't be shy to ask you to make them whenever he is back from a mission. After all, delicious dishes always make him feel like life is truly worth every hassle. You wouldn't mind him restlessly standing next to you while cooking, would you? He'd want to help so badly, c'mon, let him help. He promises to teach you some snezhnayan recipes if you allow him to.
If you like sports he'd be thrilled to learn about it, tell him all the rules and he will give you the most intense look you have seen on him, as if he was already visualizing you as an opponent. But hey, you are the expert, you don't expect him to go easy on you, right? And you better believe he will get better at it quite fast.
If it is an art form I believe he would enjoy seeing your creations, especially if you play around with random concepts that surprise him. He'd listen attentively and will give his most engaged input. I think he'd enjoy sculpting, perhaps making small decor for his siblings or for his mother. If you liked literature, he most definitely would compare it to his nation Folklore. Maybe you can write some stories for his siblings? He'd love to bring something no nation can offer (and you can read it to them as well). About painting, Ajax is someone who meditated while fishing usually, but I think he would incline towards trying to paint landscapes. He'd definitely ask you for different tips and eagerly apply them. Also, it'd probably be the most frustrating for him, so he'd want to get better. He'd love if you sent him some of your works his way, keeping them at his office or his room, he'd show them to his family as well If he thinks it'd earn you some points. If singing, or performing arts were your thing you'd bet he would be in the first row each time, he doesn't necessarily make a loud presence and he'd prefer you do most the chatting afterwards, you can both exchange opinions about folklore of your nations scenic art, maybe you can see a snezhnayan play with him? also, I believe a singing s/o would lull him most. He'd love it if you simply whispered notes to him whenever he was exhausted, the quiet of the night always made him restless. He would enjoy dancing with you aswell, he can do any trick you want (or so he says) but do not be upset if his favorite thing is swaying around with you fast. Whatever dance included fast steps or tangling legs he enjoys the most, it's thrilling to keep up while not stepping on each other.
if your thing was fashion, sewing, crochet or knitting he'd keep an eye on your designs, Tonia and his mother always received fabric from his travels so maybe you can teach him a thing or two so next time they receive a finished product instead. Or would you like to sew it? Don't worry, he would be an excellent assistant, he has a very sharp eye for measurement. If you escalated on difficulty constantly it'd fascinate him, you are going to try to do different sleeve patterns? Explain to him why that might be challenging for you. Are you trying to crochet or knit something with a new pattern? He'd always remember to ask about your progress. It'd make him more aware of the details in his own clothing whenever he dresses.
Would you have a quirky hobby he'd definitely want to know, especially if he can make it of use. Say puppets? Do I have to explain what he'd want? Of course he wants you to perform for his siblings, would you deny him? He'd even make the small theater for you to play on.
Speaking of which, carpentry would definitely be around his alley. He has some knowledge of it so you can both engage in sculpting together. That's the most silent he gets, his concentration on getting his design right, but he can't help himself but to take some small breaks to lean on you and listen to your updates on your work. He would enjoy it if you both had a shared project, you'd find that his handling of sharp objects makes him good at carving, but he can also handle whatever you don't want to deal with.
Now, if you liked chess or strategic games, I think he would be a bit hesitant. It's not that he can't play, he definitely can, it's just that he prefers things straight on without mind play. However, he can understand the rules and schemes but would rather use the most head-on and aggressive strategies so even a game of chess with him feels like a game of chase. He definitely isn't the best, but he can keep you on your toes and win a couple of times.
So, overall…
He'd very much enjoy expanding his domain of skills with you, he believes this takes you both down the path of growth.
He adores listening to you get nerdy or passionate about a subject, it ignites a buzzing feeling under his skin that makes him think of all the time he wants to spend with you.
He admires his s/o. I don't think he could date someone he doesn't admire, but that's why I insist on the fact you don't necessarily have to be a warrior. Someone he can learn from, grow with, make mistakes and share big achievements with. That's what he is after.
It is a casual thing that everything ends up with the idea of doing things for his family and you visiting, but hey, what's the harm in that? Aren't skills better when put to use for the ones you love?
Besides that, he'd always remember whatever you said about your work and projects, achievements and struggles, if he had any contact in hand that could solve your problem he'd put them to use. He uses all knowledge he can get hands on about fighting so he imagines you'd do the same about your lane.
If you truly didn't want to share your hobby with him, he'd understand, though he still is competitive. Let him show off his own to you?
Whether you let him engage or not, do praise him, be it on your hobbies or his own. He likes being acknowledged for his skills, and he will do the same for you without even blinking or feeling an ounce of shame. Quite a lot… Actually, too much.
He comes to make your interests part of his life, especially whenever he is away. Any trace related to your abilities would make him wonder what you are on about now. He hopes you are giving it your all. He can't wait to see how much stronger you are now.
Thanks for reading! In my head, he was the last character I wanted to write for since I get so nervous about it... but he means a lot to me, and i keep getting haunted. Hope you enjoyed it! ♡
Warnings: mentions of tartaglia backstory, slight angst in that way, but it's not the main topic. Do tell me. Not my first language.
just some thoughts I have about his spirit and drive. My requests are always open. Feel free to ask anything.
About his passion…
Tartaglia doesn't care exclusively for fighting. Strength involves many aspects of life; eating, exercise, sleep, habits that keep you in good shape for the field. Naturally, he tries to keep good routines, which leads him to different hobbies.
It'd be a lie to say it's completely out of his pursuit of strength, ever since his fall in the abyss tradition became something he held in a dear place of his heart. Of course it translated to his own ways, but it was a way to feel like he had actually made it back home. Like he was still part of his family, the scenery of them smiling at his fishing catch is much kinder than the memory of them enlisting him to the fatui.
He had learned cooking, being organized and efficient, meditating, fishing, ice sculpting, he'd even learn carpentry if his siblings asked for anything.
He has one or two competitive bones in his body that make him want to always be better, not even at the face of another but of his own skills. He wants to overachieve, he loves the face of surprise on his family and you.
For example, if he cooks he wants to make a better dish next time. The texture could be better, he could try to use an ingredient you wouldn't even have thought of, and he could definitely work around the presentation. Yes… it made him buzz with excitement to think of the look on your face when he presents you with his next piece, maybe you could try it on your visit to his homeland?
When it came to you…
He doesn't quite mind what exactly it is that you are passionate about, but I think he definitely would appreciate you holding something dear to you as well.
Whether it is cooking, painting, singing, or any sort of art or sport, he'd bask on listening to you talk about your findings and your next projects.
He would definitely try any of your hobbies.
If you like cooking, think of his birthday card, he will want to have a competition. Come on, what's a couple of odd ingredients? he will be a fair critic, and you can both enjoy your feast afterward. He likes to cook for you but it's not against you cooking either, just let him make dessert in exchange? He loves good food and he's not a picky eater so he will remember the taste of every dish you have made, and won't be shy to ask you to make them whenever he is back from a mission. After all, delicious dishes always make him feel like life is truly worth every hassle. You wouldn't mind him restlessly standing next to you while cooking, would you? He'd want to help so badly, c'mon, let him help. He promises to teach you some snezhnayan recipes if you allow him to.
If you like sports he'd be thrilled to learn about it, tell him all the rules and he will give you the most intense look you have seen on him, as if he was already visualizing you as an opponent. But hey, you are the expert, you don't expect him to go easy on you, right? And you better believe he will get better at it quite fast.
If it is an art form I believe he would enjoy seeing your creations, especially if you play around with random concepts that surprise him. He'd listen attentively and will give his most engaged input. I think he'd enjoy sculpting, perhaps making small decor for his siblings or for his mother. If you liked literature, he most definitely would compare it to his nation Folklore. Maybe you can write some stories for his siblings? He'd love to bring something no nation can offer (and you can read it to them as well). About painting, Ajax is someone who meditated while fishing usually, but I think he would incline towards trying to paint landscapes. He'd definitely ask you for different tips and eagerly apply them. Also, it'd probably be the most frustrating for him, so he'd want to get better. He'd love if you sent him some of your works his way, keeping them at his office or his room, he'd show them to his family as well If he thinks it'd earn you some points. If singing, or performing arts were your thing you'd bet he would be in the first row each time, he doesn't necessarily make a loud presence and he'd prefer you do most the chatting afterwards, you can both exchange opinions about folklore of your nations scenic art, maybe you can see a snezhnayan play with him? also, I believe a singing s/o would lull him most. He'd love it if you simply whispered notes to him whenever he was exhausted, the quiet of the night always made him restless. He would enjoy dancing with you aswell, he can do any trick you want (or so he says) but do not be upset if his favorite thing is swaying around with you fast. Whatever dance included fast steps or tangling legs he enjoys the most, it's thrilling to keep up while not stepping on each other.
if your thing was fashion, sewing, crochet or knitting he'd keep an eye on your designs, Tonia and his mother always received fabric from his travels so maybe you can teach him a thing or two so next time they receive a finished product instead. Or would you like to sew it? Don't worry, he would be an excellent assistant, he has a very sharp eye for measurement. If you escalated on difficulty constantly it'd fascinate him, you are going to try to do different sleeve patterns? Explain to him why that might be challenging for you. Are you trying to crochet or knit something with a new pattern? He'd always remember to ask about your progress. It'd make him more aware of the details in his own clothing whenever he dresses.
Would you have a quirky hobby he'd definitely want to know, especially if he can make it of use. Say puppets? Do I have to explain what he'd want? Of course he wants you to perform for his siblings, would you deny him? He'd even make the small theater for you to play on.
Speaking of which, carpentry would definitely be around his alley. He has some knowledge of it so you can both engage in sculpting together. That's the most silent he gets, his concentration on getting his design right, but he can't help himself but to take some small breaks to lean on you and listen to your updates on your work. He would enjoy it if you both had a shared project, you'd find that his handling of sharp objects makes him good at carving, but he can also handle whatever you don't want to deal with.
Now, if you liked chess or strategic games, I think he would be a bit hesitant. It's not that he can't play, he definitely can, it's just that he prefers things straight on without mind play. However, he can understand the rules and schemes but would rather use the most head-on and aggressive strategies so even a game of chess with him feels like a game of chase. He definitely isn't the best, but he can keep you on your toes and win a couple of times.
So, overall…
He'd very much enjoy expanding his domain of skills with you, he believes this takes you both down the path of growth.
He adores listening to you get nerdy or passionate about a subject, it ignites a buzzing feeling under his skin that makes him think of all the time he wants to spend with you.
He admires his s/o. I don't think he could date someone he doesn't admire, but that's why I insist on the fact you don't necessarily have to be a warrior. Someone he can learn from, grow with, make mistakes and share big achievements with. That's what he is after.
It is a casual thing that everything ends up with the idea of doing things for his family and you visiting, but hey, what's the harm in that? Aren't skills better when put to use for the ones you love?
Besides that, he'd always remember whatever you said about your work and projects, achievements and struggles, if he had any contact in hand that could solve your problem he'd put them to use. He uses all knowledge he can get hands on about fighting so he imagines you'd do the same about your lane.
If you truly didn't want to share your hobby with him, he'd understand, though he still is competitive. Let him show off his own to you?
Whether you let him engage or not, do praise him, be it on your hobbies or his own. He likes being acknowledged for his skills, and he will do the same for you without even blinking or feeling an ounce of shame. Quite a lot… Actually, too much.
He comes to make your interests part of his life, especially whenever he is away. Any trace related to your abilities would make him wonder what you are on about now. He hopes you are giving it your all. He can't wait to see how much stronger you are now.
Thanks for reading! In my head, he was the last character I wanted to write for since I get so nervous about it... but he means a lot to me, and i keep getting haunted. Hope you enjoyed it! ♡
Warnings: mentions of tartaglia backstory, slight angst in that way, but it's not the main topic. Do tell me. Not my first language.
just some thoughts I have about his spirit and drive. My requests are always open. Feel free to ask anything.
About his passion…
Tartaglia doesn't care exclusively for fighting. Strength involves many aspects of life; eating, exercise, sleep, habits that keep you in good shape for the field. Naturally, he tries to keep good routines, which leads him to different hobbies.
It'd be a lie to say it's completely out of his pursuit of strength, ever since his fall in the abyss tradition became something he held in a dear place of his heart. Of course it translated to his own ways, but it was a way to feel like he had actually made it back home. Like he was still part of his family, the scenery of them smiling at his fishing catch is much kinder than the memory of them enlisting him to the fatui.
He had learned cooking, being organized and efficient, meditating, fishing, ice sculpting, he'd even learn carpentry if his siblings asked for anything.
He has one or two competitive bones in his body that make him want to always be better, not even at the face of another but of his own skills. He wants to overachieve, he loves the face of surprise on his family and you.
For example, if he cooks he wants to make a better dish next time. The texture could be better, he could try to use an ingredient you wouldn't even have thought of, and he could definitely work around the presentation. Yes… it made him buzz with excitement to think of the look on your face when he presents you with his next piece, maybe you could try it on your visit to his homeland?
When it came to you…
He doesn't quite mind what exactly it is that you are passionate about, but I think he definitely would appreciate you holding something dear to you as well.
Whether it is cooking, painting, singing, or any sort of art or sport, he'd bask on listening to you talk about your findings and your next projects.
He would definitely try any of your hobbies.
If you like cooking, think of his birthday letter, he will want to have a competition. Come on, what's a couple of odd ingredients? he will be a fair critic, and you can both enjoy your feast afterward. He likes to cook for you but it's not against you cooking either, just let him make dessert in exchange? He loves good food and he's not a picky eater so he will remember the taste of every dish you have made, and won't be shy to ask you to make them whenever he is back from a mission. After all, delicious dishes always make him feel like life is truly worth every hassle. You wouldn't mind him restlessly standing next to you while cooking, would you? He'd want to help so badly, c'mon, let him help. He promises to teach you some snezhnayan recipes if you allow him to.
If you like sports he'd be thrilled to learn about it, tell him all the rules and he will give you the most intense look you have seen on him, as if he was already visualizing you as an opponent. But hey, you are the expert, you don't expect him to go easy on you, right? And you better believe he will get better at it quite fast.
If it is an art form I believe he would enjoy seeing your creations, especially if you play around with random concepts that surprise him. He'd listen attentively and will give his most engaged input. I think he'd enjoy sculpting, perhaps making small decor for his siblings or for his mother. If you liked literature, he most definitely would compare it to his nation Folklore. Maybe you can write some stories for his siblings? He'd love to bring something no nation can offer (and you can read it to them as well). About painting, Ajax is someone who meditated while fishing usually, but I think he would incline towards trying to paint landscapes. He'd definitely ask you for different tips and eagerly apply them. Also, it'd probably be the most frustrating for him, so he'd want to get better. He'd love if you sent him some of your works his way, keeping them at his office or his room, he'd show them to his family as well If he thinks it'd earn you some points. If singing, or performing arts were your thing you'd bet he would be in the first row each time, he doesn't necessarily make a loud presence and he'd prefer you do most the chatting afterwards, you can both exchange opinions about folklore of your nations scenic art, maybe you can see a snezhnayan play with him? also, I believe a singing s/o would lull him most. He'd love it if you simply whispered notes to him whenever he was exhausted, the quiet of the night always made him restless. He would enjoy dancing with you aswell, he can do any trick you want (or so he says) but do not be upset if his favorite thing is swaying around with you fast. Whatever dance included fast steps or tangling legs he enjoys the most, it's thrilling to keep up while not stepping on each other.
if your thing was fashion, sewing, crochet or knitting he'd keep an eye on your designs, Tonia and his mother always received fabric from his travels so maybe you can teach him a thing or two so next time they receive a finished product instead. Or would you like to sew it? Don't worry, he would be an excellent assistant, he has a very sharp eye for measurement. If you escalated on difficulty constantly it'd fascinate him, you are going to try to do different sleeve patterns? Explain to him why that might be challenging for you. Are you trying to crochet or knit something with a new pattern? He'd always remember to ask about your progress. It'd make him more aware of the details in his own clothing whenever he dresses.
Would you have a quirky hobby he'd definitely want to know, especially if he can make it of use. Say puppets? Do I have to explain what he'd want? Of course he wants you to perform for his siblings, would you deny him? He'd even make the small theater for you to play on.
Speaking of which, carpentry would definitely be around his alley. He has some knowledge of it so you can both engage in sculpting together. That's the most silent he gets, his concentration on getting his design right, but he can't help himself but to take some small breaks to lean on you and listen to your updates on your work. He would enjoy it if you both had a shared project, you'd find that his handling of sharp objects makes him good at carving, but he can also handle whatever you don't want to deal with.
Now, if you liked chess or strategic games, I think he would be a bit hesitant. It's not that he can't play, he definitely can, it's just that he prefers things straight on without mind play. However, he can understand the rules and schemes but would rather use the most head-on and aggressive strategies so even a game of chess with him feels like a game of chase. He definitely isn't the best, but he can keep you on your toes and win a couple of times.
So, overall…
He'd very much enjoy expanding his domain of skills with you, he believes this takes you both down the path of growth.
He adores listening to you get nerdy or passionate about a subject, it ignites a buzzing feeling under his skin that makes him think of all the time he wants to spend with you.
He admires his s/o. I don't think he could date someone he doesn't admire, but that's why I insist on the fact you don't necessarily have to be a warrior. Someone he can learn from, grow with, make mistakes and share big achievements with. That's what he is after.
It is a casual thing that everything ends up with the idea of doing things for his family and you visiting, but hey, what's the harm in that? Aren't skills better when put to use for the ones you love?
Besides that, he'd always remember whatever you said about your work and projects, achievements and struggles, if he had any contact in hand that could solve your problem he'd put them to use. He uses all knowledge he can get hands on about fighting so he imagines you'd do the same about your lane.
If you truly didn't want to share your hobby with him, he'd understand, though he still is competitive. Let him show off his own to you?
Whether you let him engage or not, do praise him, be it on your hobbies or his own. He likes being acknowledged for his skills, and he will do the same for you without even blinking or feeling an ounce of shame. Quite a lot… Actually, too much.
He comes to make your interests part of his life, especially whenever he is away. Any trace related to your abilities would make him wonder what you are on about now. He hopes you are giving it your all. He can't wait to see how much stronger you are now.
Thanks for reading! In my head, he was the last character I wanted to write for since I get so nervous about it... but he means a lot to me, and i keep getting haunted. Hope you enjoyed it! ♡
Silence. That's something you're not used to hearing in Ajax's presence.
He's charismatic, cocky, confident…definitely not quiet.
Well, sometimes he is, whenever you're laying on his freckle-scattered chest for example, reading while wrapped up in his toned arms, his chin resting on your head; or when you're walking in the warm lights of Liyue Harbor, hand in hand as you look over to the colorful stalls; but this…is a different kind of silence.
You sit next to him, your legs dangling over the edge of your terrace as you stare out at the glistening moon.
"Ajax."
He turns his eyes to you, his smile lines wrinkling just ever so slightly.
"What is it?"
You ponder over his calm expression. You love many things about him, the inability of his face to be read isn't among them. It makes you wonder…will you ever be able to read him? It’s hard not to think that ,maybe, he’s just looking for something to fill some sort of hole in his life until the next assignment comes along.
"You're doing it again." He laughs.
"Ah." Your teeth press to the inside of your lips. "I was just wondering why you were so quiet." You say hesitantly, with a half smile.
He thinks it over, his expression suspended in time for a second.
The murky night hides your figures, a dark blue blanket hiding you away from the harsh, white light of the moon.
"I think I'm just at peace."
You snort out a laugh. "Even if there's no powerful beast to kill?" Your tone drips of suspicion.
"I don't know what to tell you, it's probably because of you." He grins, his hand going for yours.
Your left eyebrow raises. "So what, I'm like a safe port you come back to?"
"Something like that." He muses.
"I hope I'm not just that…" You mumble out as he reaches over to you, brushing your hair away from your cheek.
"Of course not—" He chuckles."—hold still." He murmurs before leaning in, planting a soft kiss on your blushing lips.
Your fingers graze his chin as he pulls away, your other hand skimming through his copper hair. You stare at him, barely making out his features in the dark, except for his blue eyes. The moonlight hits them just enough for you to see their rich, cobalt hue.
⤷ 𝓼𝓯𝔀. leon is a stray dog of a man. first kisses. 𝟸.𝟿𝓀
leon is overly tired and very grumpy. it’s no surprise really when he rolled home in the early hours of the morning, bruised and so battered from his recent assignment—spain, if you remember it correctly—but since then, he clearly hasn’t slept and his mood is suffering for it. so, you take it upon yourself to fix it for him
“hey, leon?” you call out softly from your spot on the couch and then wince when you hear a cupboard door slamming shut in the kitchen. he’s been banging around in there for a while and truthfully, you have no idea what he’s trying to accomplish and you find it best not to ask, “c’mere for a second, please,”
it takes a moment but eventually, he leans around the kitchen doorframe with a frown pulling at his brows. he looks exhausted, his eyes are sunken in and the dark circles that are discoloring the tops of his cheeks can’t even hide behind the blonde hairs that hang in front of his face, “what’s up?” he asks, grumbling
his voice is rough, scratchy and faintly worn out, causing it to sound far deeper than it usually does. butterflies swarm low in your stomach over it—like they always do—but you try to ignore it this time whilst you smile and stretch your arms out towards him, “come and lay with me for a while, please,” you plead
the frown that’s painted across leon’s face deepens, his eyes get distant on the surface but you can see behind it—you can see right through him. something soft and melting hides behind the ice of his eyes, something that he doesn’t allow himself to feel often, much less indulge in it when you’re offering, “why?”
answering that with honesty is complicated. telling leon that you’re trying to lure him in, make him relax, force him to be pliant so that he can be tempted with sleep won’t ever work, you learnt that early on and because of it, you’ve had to get creative with telling little white lies that’ll benefit him in the long run
“because, i want you to,” you answer simply, keeping your tone light and airy, treating him as if he’s a shelter animal that’s at risk of backing into the corner, that’s furthest away from wherever you are, with his teeth bared. it’s not really a lie either, you would like him to lay with you but your motives behind it don’t need to be discussed
“but, why?” he asks again, this time sounding desperate and slightly pathetic. he knows that you’re lying in one way or another and he’s letting you. he’d never admit it but you’re the only person that can get away with it. if it were anyone else, he would’ve turned tail and left without even entertaining it
your head tips to the side, eyes raking over his face—the scars, the bruises, the cuts—whilst you make the decision to be somewhat candid with him, if only for his sake, “i just don’t like it when you shut yourself in your room after an assignment, that’s all,” you explain, carefully, still watching him
leon nods, his tongue darting between his lips, “do roommates lay together often?” he snarks, though there’s not a whole lot of heat behind it. he’s trying to deflect your offer, make himself out to be someone that you wouldn’t want near you at all but much to his dismay, it won’t work. it never does and it never will
“i don’t think roommates is the right word anymore, leon,” you point out with a knowing look—one that reminds him of the times you’ve patched him up, scrubbed dried blood from his body and washed gunpowder and god only knows what else from his hair, all without a complaint. “stop being difficult and come over here,”
the change in his eyes is the first thing that you notice, the first sign of submission. the distant look gets overpowered by the softness in an instant when he realises that he’s too exhausted to argue and what good would it do, he’ll only give into you in the end anyway, “yeah—yeah, okay,” he murmurs
finally, he steps out from where he was hiding against the kitchen doorframe. whatever he was doing—or rather, trying to do—in there seemingly becomes irrelevant as he shuffles towards you slowly with the telltale evidence of an ache that spreads throughout every single one of his limbs without his say so
still though, your eyes wander selfishly. his t-shirt is a size too small and clings to his biceps in all of the right places, his grey sweatpants hang low on his hips and one of the legs is caught up around his shin, exposing a ring of tanned skin between his clothing and his socks. he looks comfortable, for once
when he gets close enough, his teeth graze over his bottom lip and his gaze flickers between you and the couch and then over to the television that has been muted ever since you spotted him slinking out of his bedroom. he’s stalling but it only takes a soft flutter of your lashes to get him to cave and fall into you
it’s rather unceremonious and kind of clumsy. his limbs knock against your own and the couch creaks rudely with his added weight but eventually, he just gives up and sort of flops down on top of you, leaving his cheek smushing into your stomach and your legs spreading to accommodate his body
leon sighs. it rattles out of him while his arms snake around your waist, holding you pretty close for a guy who made out like he didn’t want this. it makes you smile, not that he can see it and for the first time ever, you hope that he can’t detect that butterflies that are still whirlwind-ing in your stomach, right under his head
instinctively, your fingers start to card through his hair. it feels like silk against your skin and it’s hard for you to imagine that not all that long ago it was thick with dirt and someone else’s blood—you try not to think about it as leon gives a small grunt of contentment, barely there and muffled but, it’s something
minutes pass by languidly, like time doesn’t really exist when leon is cosplaying as the most handsome weighted blanket. he stays quiet, enjoying the drag of your nails against his scalp and slowly, his breathing starts to even out as sleep starts to entice him but then he goes all at once and he jerks—hard
muscles pull taut all over his body while he goes from being on the edge of slumber to almost wide awake in the blink of an eye, “shouldn’t be—be doing this, i have work to do, reports and stuff” he rambles under his breath, trying to push himself up and away from you and this time you sigh deeply
guilt holds him in its grasp. survivors guilt—maybe. the constant feeling that he’s not allowed to relax, he’s not allowed to indulge in the simplest of things. the feeling that he has to keep going, an act of penance that’ll never be satisfied, no matter the amount of people saved or the heavy toll that it’s taking on his body
“leon—no, lay down,” you urge, though you sound more sympathetic than you’d like to. leon doesn’t like sympathy, he doesn’t like pity either but as your fingers slide underneath the neckline of his shirt and splay across tense muscles, he pauses, forces out a shuddered breath and then reluctantly relaxes again
“why do you even care about this?”
you flinch when leon can’t even ask why you care about him. he swaps the word with ease, leaves it unsaid but implied—even if he doesn’t mean to, “because i just do and if i didn’t, then who would?” you ask. it’s rhetorical, open ended if he wants to respond but there’s no pressure for him to try
strong arms loop around your waist again and large hands flatten against your spine, touching and committing the most ordinary parts of your body to memory, like it was made just for him, “you shouldn’t,” he whispers and the worst part is, he truly means it. he really doesn’t believe that anyone would care about him
“mhmm—sounded like a rough one this time so i’m trying to extra care of…this,” you breathe, repeating the same phrase that he used whilst shifting the subject ever so slightly. leon grunts in agreement—it was a rough job—and it gives you the chance to ask your favorite question, “do you want to talk about it?”
“no,”
just as you expected, the normal response. you have to ask him though and you won’t press the issue further, you won’t try to force him to open up about what he went through. instead, you leave it be and let an easy silence fill the space between you and him. you’re there if he changes his mind and that’s enough
in the meantime though, you drift your fingertips up and down the back of leon’s neck, tickling and just barely scratching your nails up through his hair and right back down to the top of his spine whilst leon seems to lose himself in a deep thought, one that allows you to see the proverbial cogs turning in his mind
a moment later, something shifts. you can’t pinpoint it and it’s odd because you feel it before anything really happens, almost like something prepares you for the shaky lungful of air that leon sucks into his body but then it leaves you high and dry, caught wholly off guard, for the gentle press of lips against your hipbone
it’s not a kiss—it can’t be. leon must’ve done it accidentally. too engrossed in his thoughts to realise that he did it but it felt like a kiss. fizzling beneath your skin, blossoming throughout your veins, a thing that you’ve wanted for too long. fleeting and sweet, causing you to overthink it, spoiling yourself with it. and then,
“i nearly died this time,”
your heart sinks. swooping low, stealing the air from your lungs. it hurts to hear, especially from a guy who has the most awful habit of consistently downplaying every single thing that happens to him, “w-what—oh my god—wait, come up here, please,” you gasp, screwing your hands into his shirt to haul him upwards
leon moves promptly, clambering and collapsing into the sliver of space between your body and the back of the couch. he slots in with ease and rolls you to face him, pressing his broad chest into yours as he settles his head against the armrest. he’s so close, more so than he’s ever been before but it's not enough
before you can think better of it, you’re draping your thigh up and over leon’s hip and tentatively resting your hand on his ribs but it doesn’t quite have the desired effect when leon flinches. a bruise from his assignment makes his body jerk and immediately, you feel awful and try to snatch your hand back
“no—don’t,” leon mumbles, vulnerable and out of his depth, while he catches your wrist and pulls your hand back to put it in it’s place. his own hand hovers over yours, displaying a size difference that makes you feel a little bit dizzy before his hand flits to your thigh and smooths tenderly up the outside of your leg
seconds bleed into minutes as you take the time to just exist with leon being so close. his breath fans over your cheek with every exhale and his hand squeezes lightly at your thigh but ultimately, you build up the courage to ask, “how did you—how did you almost…” you trail off, unable to say the words out loud
“that part doesn’t—it doesn’t matter,” leon answers you, too fast and frowning. his walls go back up—albeit, they’re only half the size that they normally are and ready to crumble at moments notice—while he attempts to draw your attention away from his confession. though, all it does is leave you feeling confused
an incredulous laugh bubbles in your throat, “leon—that’s insane, it does matter—you matter,” you rant frantically, hung up on the fact that you really almost lost him this time. sure—it’s a constant risk with his job but hearing him admit it makes it all too much for you to handle, “i mean—how can you even say that it—”
“i thought about you,”
oh. your previously sunken heart swells when leon cuts you off. your eyes widen as your breath hitches in your throat but your mind muddles with every single plausible implication of his words. maybe it’s wishful thinking on your part but it all leads back to one singular thing. still though, you blurt, “why?”
“i don’t know—i just—” leon stops himself and then presses his lips into a thin line. his eyes harden, only slightly, and his walls build themselves up to their full height. he’s struggling and you don’t blame him but you need to know and your fingers screwing into his shirt urges him on, “all i could think about was you and—”
you can’t take it anymore. you crowd into the small amount of personal space that he has left and press your lips into his and his walls collapse. he doesn’t hesitate, he doesn’t waste another second before he’s kissing you back. soft, slow, sweet, all of the things that you weren’t entirely sure that he was capable of
his hand finds your waist, squeezing and tugging you closer until your bodies are flush against each other. your hand slides over his jaw and he doesn’t wince when you brush against the bruise that’s blooming underneath your palm. if it hurts him, he doesn’t show it because he’s too busy. he’s right where he wants to be
it’s all consuming, swallowing both of you whole where you lay on the couch until the air in your lungs begins to thin, causing you and leon to part your lips in an effort to breathe. he’s smiling though, you can feel it against your mouth whilst your chest rises and falls with every gasping breath
“shit—if i’d known—would’a told you ages ago,” leon mumbles in between kisses that have turned needy. it’s like he’s been teased with the taste of you and he’s worried that if he pulls away now, he’ll never get it again. somehow, the thought of that is far more harrowing than anything he’s ever encountered on a job
“what do you mean—ages ago?” you whisper, also refusing to interrupt the lazy flow of kisses that are being shared between you and him, as your fingers ghost up his jaw and into his hair once more. not pulling or tugging, just playing deftly in a way that makes him grunt low in his chest and grip your waist harder
he hesitates now. stuck somewhere between wanting to wear his heart on his sleeve and wanting to keep all of his secrets under lock and key. there’s a lull in his kisses, a moment where he’s too stuck to remember that he’s supposed to be kissing you back but when you threaten to pull away, he makes his decision quickly
“i think about you every time—all the time,” leon concedes with his bloodshot eyes wildly searching yours. he sounds sure of himself, no mumbling or muttering under his breath, he’s admitting it and you can practically see the weight of it lifting off of his shoulders, “it’s always just—you,” he breathes
inside of your chest, your heart is preparing to burst. it aches with happiness and an overwhelming sense of fulfilment and you can’t stop yourself from surging forwards to kiss him again. leon gasps as his bottom lip slots between yours—a sound that you haven’t ever heard from him—and then when you pull back, he grunts
“think about you too,” you giggle, sharing his sentiment, before you wriggle in close and tuck yourself against leon’s body. you fit together like puzzle pieces, your head slotting under his chin while his muscular arms wrap you up. you’ve found your place and you never plan on leaving, “miss you when you’re gone,”
“yeah?” leon chuckles, deep and throaty, muffled by his lips pressing a soft kiss to the crown of your head as you yawn and nod in response, “thought you were trying to trick me into sleeping,” he teases, revealing that he knew what you were trying to do this entire time—you’re not mad about it though
still though, you playfully huff, “yeah—well—i am,” you mumble and press your ear against his chest to listen to the thrum of his heart beating. it’s an even thump, not panicked or rushed, just satisfied, “you’re gonna nap with me,” you garble around another yawn as leon’s exhaustion becomes infectious
“am i?” leon asks, though he’s already rearranging himself to get comfortable and tightening his arms around you, holding you close and trapping you against him. you nod again, not giving him a choice, but he doesn’t seem to care when he’s kissing your temple and whispering a peaceful, “yeah—i am,”
thanks for reading! remember to like! reblog! and comment! i’ll give you a kiss if you do, mwah ily! send prompts to my ask box!
Context: inspired by “Last night on Earth” and the last event of Nod Krai where Wislawa revealed old weapons of the fatui are sold or used by recruits, even the ones of important people.
Warning: mentions of death (no one loses their life) and weaponry. angst? Please tell me if I forget anything.
Ps. I haven't written fanfiction for a while. Please be patient with me 😭. Also not my first language.
You had come to know him, years of traveling did that to partners turned lovers.
Ajax preferred to keep things implied, always making a weapon out of dramatics and social expectations; an avid charmer when needed and good at “persuasion” when that wasn't enough. But he had a sincere heart, even at the edges of his attempts at politeness his stance shone through small twitches of his smile. Because of that boisterous and sharp cut ways were his preference, he could proclaim his perceptions and values quite boldly if he didn't need to gain favor (being backed by his abilities to defend himself).
Being around him was easy in that sense, over the years even a lie or omission of his could be a very direct message. He trusted you to unravel it, a shared language and a testament of your bond; if he didn't know how long his mission would be he'd give you something to keep him around, maybe a scarf or a hairpin a merchant suggested, alongside the proclamation of wanting to know how much you'd both change the next time you cross paths; Whenever he was upset he kept an arrogant smirk on his face that unknowingly showed clenched teeth. It was enough for you to feel his restless boot against your own under the table to know he wasn't in a good mood; If he were to upset you he'd linger, sometimes in silence and others with tea, but always wanting to get over the conflict. He wasn't one to want to go to bed upset, even if that meant listening, sparring, or maybe just saying that he was “polishing his weapons, not lingering nearby”.
With him being so confident it was eerie, that night.
He had looked normal, his smile and relaxed eyebrows glancing at the landscape after a long commission in the mountains. He was staring at the stars, and his voice displayed the same peacefulness the summer breeze carried. “Comrade” a word he called whenever a pet name wasn't enough, reflecting something deeper in your history; an ally, a friend, his lover, his most trusted person. “Have I ever mentioned this one fatui tradition? You see, for our cause is bigger than us we are ready to give everything of ourselves, even… well, our lives.” he knew it wasn't pretty to say “The rest of ourselves is truly none the different. Our ranks, our names, even our weapons are passed or sold if it helps the future of the Fatui” he didn't seem to be sharing a burden, rather familiar with the fact “The Tsaritsa has earned my respect, as you are well aware of, in that regard I am willing to follow her desire for our nation” he didn't pause, but his eyes still visited the stars “Back when I asked you to be my witness on my fight with that enormous beast I was ready for the chance of my fall, underestimating any enemy is a fatal choice. But if I'm honest…” His eyes finally fell into your own, his smile looked like one of a gone man for a second. Even if he wasn't, wouldn't be. He merely was someone who wasn't scared to dip his heels in the darkest of concepts. “I am not sure I want that. I do not want my weapons to be collected and sold. My master showed pride, conquest and connection to her weaponry, it's only natural I feel the same” his hand slowly moved to rest his fingers over your own “so, I have to ask an important promise of you, my comrade. If I ever were to face the greatest of challenges in life, the one no warrior returns from… promise me you'll honor the weapon I've wielded all these years.” Even if he faced you it was clear memories played at his heart “the one you've cared for whenever I overused my delusion, the one that had your back through all of this, the one that has my truest will at its core”
No answer was easy to give at such a moment, for a second one could only wish life was made of the kindest scenes. The dinners full of laughter, the endless talks when climbing, even his annoying insistence on waking up slightly earlier to face your annoyance first thing in the morning. Carrying his hand to your heart, the only mumble that could take place was “I promise” because chances, wishes, the bestest of intentions didn't matter, they could end in tragedy nonetheless. You didn't notice his shoulders had stiffened at some point, only seen them fall after your words, this was clearly important to him.
His fingers moved from your hand only to caress your jaw quickly, a small comfort and familiar words “Now, don't go getting sad on me, comrade. I am not falling in any foreseeable future, remember, you still owe me one final fight” it felt both a blessing and a question, the way he remained untouched by time despite every adventure you went on. Even if it felt bittersweet to smile back, as an adventurer you knew tenderness took many shapes in this world. He sealed the moment with a kiss on your cheek, his arrogant smirk gaining presence once more.
“I'm here to honour you, if I lose everything in the fire did I ever make it through?"
I am back, I have written nothing but poetry for years but now I want to try again. Here is a list as a promise to myself
♡ Diluc
♡ Zhongli
♡ Tartaglia
♡ Baizhu
♡ Maybe Flins.
For years I've kept on waiting because I felt I didn't know enough to write, and that thought kept me from knowing anything at all. I might make mistakes but I want to make something.
IMPORTANT: spoilers for his story/lines. May count as hurt/comfort?
If his eyes were keen for art he would have noticed how the window looked exactly like a piece of art, even with the rough edges of wood around it, scratched and old. Even with the insistent drops of rain hiding most of the outside landscape, even the small sideboard (in the same conditions as the window) played a harmonious part in the view. However, Ajax was far too lost in conversation to think of such trivial things, staring into your eyes instead, he could only wonder when was the last time he had gotten genuinely interested chatting like this. It was… great, he would decide.
So it felt a bit cold and uncertain when you stood up after he accepted a request you had, ready to proceed. He wasn't uncomfortable, rather taken aback by the spontaneity of your petition, but wouldn't deny you such a simple desire. You had asked to braid his hair, laughing away the confusion at the fact it was pretty short.
Your fingers were strangers to his body, unconsciously he held his breath before allowing it to escape again. Soft and carefully the locks of hair were slipping through your fingers, soft, so soft. He couldn't help but to stare at the window in front of him.
You brought dear memories back, ones that felt truly mundane back at the time but now were filled with adoration. The sounds of steps on the squeaking wood floor, sunshine invading the scene of the afternoon (and yet, never warming them up), his sister dutifully sat while their sisters braided each other's hair. They would talk for a long time, so much their eyelashes would start to noticeably weigh and night would reach them soon, but young Ajax would barely pay attention to their words.
Tartaglia couldn't help but smile in content. The rain in the window served him for inspiration as well, remembering the nights he would try to keep eyes closed enthusiastically as a child, unable to wait until morning to go fishing with father. Perhaps it would have been easier to be patient if imagination satiated his curiosity; what stories would father share the next day? What adventures would await him?
On nights where he was particularly struggling more the voice of their mother would be heard from afar, singing a lullaby to the younger brother while probably rocking him to sleep, loud enough for him to drift off as well.
Ah, it had been a long time since his chest had that burning sensation of impatience at night. Well, come to think of it, it had been a long time since a lot of things had happened for the last time. The man couldn't remember the last time he saw his mother braiding his sister's hair, the last time he made a pinky promise while chanting a nursery rhyme, fishing with his father, stepping on the cold ice with all his strength while trying to break it. Over, and over again.
Over, and over again.
Perhaps it was after the time he had gotten out of the abyss, or the first time his parents stared with horror back at him. Even with a prideful exterior, he could remember the coldness of loneliness chilling him to the bone, not that his mind would wander around the thought for long. Another guess could be the endless nights under the pure moon bathing his rough wounds, mother asking him what had happened. Childe knew she never meant what had wounded him, but what had happened to her son, to Ajax, and his voice was always unable to answer. Nobile always found himself at a loss of words at the thought of the abyss, if asked, if hinted, not a sound escaped him. He could just stay there; empty, stoic, displeased. He had never talked about it, couldn't remember even reflecting about it, as a secret forbidden even to himself.
The results of his first adventure were full of wisdom for battle, of strength and devotion, but to think more than that would certainly be… not noble at all.
As an instinct, eyes closed and another slow breath left him, the wind could be heard from afar, he wondered if his motherland was experiencing the same luck as well. Then, perhaps, Teucer and Anthon could play around with the kite from Liyue, that was if they still had it of course. Suddenly, uneasiness showered him, when was the last time he had seen it?... When would be the last time he would tell Anthon about other nations, hearing him talk about books? Dear Tonia was already growing out of the clothes he had gifted her… When would be the last time his little brother would believe his fake job, happily receiving his gifts? Has Teucer ever held his eyes tight at night while thinking about his arrival? Would they eventually ever look at him the same way their parents, coworkers, other people had?
He fixed his throat, and your touch was the owner of his attention once again. Soft, soft hands. Made him feel so fragile.
So fragile.
What had happened to Ajax?
He got the draining feeling, perhaps for the very first time, that it was over. That it all were but memories. That love hurted not because of its lack of existence, but
because he was once loved, deeply so; In the mountains hidden under the snow, dancing in the village festivals, in the forest they desperately looked for him, in the lakes and in snow fights, and on dinners where chairs were not enough, in the songs they would sing together, while doing chores for a hope of one minute more of playtime, while smelling the fresh baked bread in the morning, under the moon and sky that connected him back to his motherland. Ajax was once so genuinely and shamelessly loved.
His chest started to ache, hands flexing by instinct at the irritation his own loud heartbeat caused. His stare traveled away from the window, close to the wall, to his side. And there was you. You. It made his heart so silent with anticipation.
He could find the stars in your eyes, leaving a trail after you just barely breathed and you just stood there. And it burnt him, filled with doubts, his bleeding scars wondering if there would come a time your stars would prove to be just as hurtful, just as beautiful, just as tragic as it all has.
—I was right! — you positioned in front of him, hands close to his face but not enough for him to feel your touch.
—A-ah?– Confusion evident in his expression, Nobile had gotten lost in thought to keep up with your actions.
–You look lovely with them.
Before a reaction reached him you were off to braid the other side of his hair. His eyes trembled, he wanted— almost needed to stare at you. No words could leave nor find his quittering mouth, not a movement, his hands meeting weakness after years of battle. Eyelashes could only stay frozen at your touch, not a tear would leave him, that he oathed to himself. Snezhnaya doesn't believe in tears anymore, and Ajax wasn't ready to do so either. And still ever so shameless you stole him of his breathing, of his beating heart, and he questioned how strong he really was.
But Ajax, he was so tired. So quiet, for the very first time. He closed his eyes, leaned in, and swore to count the sparkles over and over again just for the opportunity to trust you like this forever. Now that you have given him the dream of such gentle affection, he can only hope in silence that you'll defend it until the end.
—Thank you.
That night, under your touch, Ajax was loved.
I've walked around this one for a while, it's a bit hard to understand his character but still I hope you'll like it (some words/phrases make sense as references to his voicelines). This was inspired by Little women scene "I can't believe childhood is over" and a quote I came across from James Joyce (althought I don't know its context, I apologize) "Touch me. Soft eyes. Soft soft soft hand. I am lonely here. O, touch me soon, now. What is that word known to all men? I am quiet here alone. Sad too. Touch, touch me.“
Please do not copy, repost, etc. Thank you for reading!
