shit my friends insist i said more than once sentence starters;
❝can you believe my sister commented on my last instagram picture that i look like satan?❞
❝listen… i may be tiny but my kicks can reach very high don’t try me. ❞
❝ actually, you’ve got it all wrong, darling. my middle finger salutes you. ❞
❝ i look like shit, this is exactly why no one wants to date me. ❞
❝ did you know in that in eighth grade i kicked someone’s knee and broke it? ❞
❝ he deserved it, no one fucking compares me to a semi-trailer and gets away with that. ❞
❝ do i look like my brother’s keeper to you? ❞
❝ the best thing that happens when couples combine their names on facebook is that you can block them both in one press. ❞
❝ you know, it’s so weird that the saying is butterflies in your stomach, it should me just flies because usually the person you fall for is a piece of shit. ❞
❝ you know you should all just break up with your boyfriends and just date me, we could be each other’s sisters wives. ❞
❝ yes it is morning, good however it is not. ❞
❝ why do birthdays happens only once a year? i want to get birthday gifts every week.
❝ i’m literally the biggest sinner in this city. ❞
❝ how does my grandma always sees me from her window, for fucks sake, there’s a building in front of hers! ❞
❝ i just hope my grandma won’t tell my mom she saw us kiss.. ❞
❝ if you piss me off one more time i will throw my phone at your face. ❞
❝ scaring people is kinda my thing. ❞
❝ what do you mean thanks? bow down to your fucking queen. ❞
❝ what do you mean thanks? lose your clothes. ❞
❝ why yes, throwing water balloons at our boss is a good idea. ❞
❝ well you see there’s thing thing called google, how about you use that instead of driving me nuts. ❞
❝ oh for the love of god, all i wanted was a bit of silence and rihanna’s voice is that so fucking bad? ❞
❝ we should watch porn together, that will be fun. ❞
❝ who’s idea was it to do this again? ❞
❝ i swear i’m a nice person once you get to know me. ❞
❝ i am not a midget! i’m 5′0 for godness sake! ❞
❝ when will the aliens save me from this awful planet? ❞
❝ do you think anyone will notice if i burnt down the school? ❞
❝ honestly, who cares, i mean if i break my leg then i will get babied by you so just push me off the bar i beg of you. ❞
❝ i wish i was an ice cream cone. ❞
❝ you can’t handle being punk rock, you can barely handle being cheesy pop. ❞
❝ if you punch me in the face i’ll give you a dollar. ❞
❝ honestly i’ll give everything for the hulk to fight me. ❞
❝ i feel as if someone is baking me in an oven. ❞
❝ do you think i’ll be a good wife? ❞
tangentwithtanner
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stormborns
blakekathryn
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