I donât like to ask people to do things that I wouldnât do myself. As someone who has more of a leadership role in my career, that statement so easily rolls off my tongue I sometimes forget how deeply it rings true within myself. From asking someone to do something, or in the form of patience and understanding towards others, it is one in the same. Example: I focused on deep cleaning the espresso machine as it was not draining properly at work, and a visiting MIT was wowed because he has not known many salary level managers to do so. âI donât like to ask people to do things that I wouldnât do myself,â I answered his astonishment. Something Iâve learned when leading people is to use their talents where itâs needed. I think as a true leader you are just looking at the bigger picture. Instead of multiple single one reel fisherman in the middle of the ocean, you are the employing those once single fisherman and cultivating them into a team that does each necessary part in running a commercial fishing boat casting giant nets amassing tons of fish. As one of my mentors in management always says, and coined from his before him, "Put your aces in places." Now I realize I'm focusing more on how it applies and going off on a tangent about my job.....back to the original topic I wanted to share: "I don't like to ask people to do things that I wouldn't do myself." I forgive my family for doing things that annoy me, because I want their forgiveness when I do something that annoys them. And as someone who struggles with adhd and occasional depressive episodes, it's hard to accept people don't realize how mentally hard certain tasks are that are so easy to others. Grocery shopping was always so easy for my mother. She was a woman on a mission to save her family money while also spoiling myself and my siblings with what she was able to purchase with the use of coupons. However, dragging three children through the Kroger Signature store where I grew up was not easy for her. She took a giant binder and organized according to a map of the grocery store and the pattern she liked to follow within it. Once applying that to our weekly trips, it felt like we flew through the store. I had to keep my fingers wrapped around the cart for fear my grip would slip and I would lose my family forever. (I'm being sarcastic, my family would return the following week to collect me. Simply adding my to the list of items needed under milk and eggs. Kidding, again.) My mother saw her problem, created a solution, and it was executed without failure. I get overwhelmed at the store so easily its embarrassing. Sometimes its too loud, too crowded, I forget my list at home, and of course that's when my grandmother asks me to pick something up for her as well, or work is calling. My solutions, go when there is less people, always use my airpods and play music to help center me, always carry my list and add to it throughout the week as to not forget things, and duh, ignore my phone. (Only half-kidding this time.) This is how I approach most trips into public. For my family it can be very annoying to them. I guess because I'm so different and have a hard time explaining it to them in the moment, for as much as I'm frustrated to abandon my comfort zone they are frustrated to not have a normal daughter or grand-daughter who so easily goes with the flow and carries conversation despite being surrounded by so many other voices and conversations. But like I started this essay, I wouldn't ask others to do something I wouldn't do myself. So in silent way, when I pretend to not hear their grumbles about my behavior, like they pretend to not hear me retort under my breath about theirs. Now I'm losing my train of thought, but hopefully most of it makes sense and helps you understand how deeply that statement can be applied.
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