2020oof

im so tired my guys

[jeanritchie]

i love sending people my totaled car as a reaction image it’s so funny

[jeanritchie]

[acidgirl]

this line delivery has lived in my head for 10 years

[acidgirl]

Just One Guy, Just One Spider-Man… -OR Woman?!? We don’t Know; ….forsure.

[livelovelaugh-777]

[bombing]

no your honor I absolutely can make my case like an adult. first things first, fuck the defendant and fuck his family too. secondly,

[bythestardoggedmoon]

[nachtkissen]

the subreddit is using that pic as their header

[rawry-xd]

It’s important to me that you all know that this axolotl’s name is Harold.

[bees-with-swords]

"Do you ever dream of land?" The whale asks the tuna.

"No." Says the tuna, "Do you?"

"I have never seen it." Says the whale, "but deep in my body, I remember it."

"Why do you care," says the tuna, "if you will never see it."

"There are bones in my body built to walk through the forests and the mountains." Says the whale.

"They will disappear." Says the tuna, "one day, your body will forget the forests and the mountains."

"Maybe I don't want to forget," Says the whale, "The forests were once my home."

"I have seen the forests." Whispers the salmon, almost to itself.

"Tell me what you have seen," says the whale.

"The forests spawned me." Says the salmon. "They sent me to the ocean to grow. When I am fat with the bounty of the ocean, I will bring it home."

"Why would the forests seek the bounty of the oceans?" Asks the whale. "They have bounty of their own."

"You forget," says the salmon, "That the oceans were once their home."

[hearnoweevil]

Last year I finally had an excuse to illustrate this simple little Tumblr story I've had bookmarked forever for class.

I hope you like it :]

[chungledown-bimothy]

bodies should have crash logs. why the fuck did that just happen.

[sleepyrogues]

Pro hag, anti ai

[ivfhnyfubpx]

this scene is so fucking funny the english dub of this show is so good

[laughconfetti]

loud warning

[notajerusalemcricketd-deactivat]

[nunnatheinsanegerbil]

[teaboot]

Rolling on the floor sobbing and crying and losing my mind at “GET INSIDE THE VAAAAAAAAAAN”

[its-your-mind]

finally. an appropriate name for my ‘time to leave’ alarm.

[billiecauter]

reblog to summon godzilla directly into washington dc

[sackboys-moved]

Love not having a ”””fandom””” specific blog. Something new will just consume my mind and everyone has to accept it. My house

[fellshish]

i’m so glad goncharov happened pre ai slop era

[romanitas]

#weird way to describe 1973 but i guess it’s accurate

[sailermoon]

this is how new yorkers @ mamdani

[sailermoon]

[agnesmontague]

ive invented (note: dubious claim) something i call the bear diet which is mostly fruits and vegetables with fish as the main protein source and something like once a month you eat a few hyperprocessed foods of your liking because that is when you, the bear, raid a dumpster in the suburbs

[stellarskyes]

after the hyperprocessed foods, do you take tranquilizers to simulate getting captured by animal control and returned to the wild?

[agnesmontague]

i would settle for melatonin gummies but well. knock yourself out

[sunbeetle]

friend group in their 20s

friend 1: just folded laundry for 3 hours 😊

friend 2: i think my stomach wall is eroding guys idk what to do

friend 3: have u seen a doctor yet???

friend 2: well nooo...

friend 4: someone is at my door 😰

friend 1: just cleaned the sinks and toilets 😍

friend 2: no really the light is fading from my eyes

friend 4: a tree fell on my neighbor

you: just got off work is anybody free

[a hot, silent wind blows]

[onlytiktoks]

[hotrale]

Frequent visitor

[quendergeer]

there he goes