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YOU ARE THE REASON
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$LAYYYTER
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Sweet Seals For You, Always
Keni
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
blake kathryn
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
if i look back, i am lost
art blog(derogatory)
Misplaced Lens Cap
Origami Around
JBB: An Artblog!
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Xuebing Du
Sade Olutola
Peter Solarz
seen from France
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seen from Netherlands
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seen from United States
seen from Romania
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seen from United States
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@screaming-coelacanth
RSD check
Your friends don’t secretly hate you
You’re not a bad person for things you did and said months or years ago that you now recognize as bad
You aren’t cringe for being excited about things
You don’t talk too much
If you feel sick from intrusive thoughts/rsd please sip on some water, get a blanket or plush to cuddle, put on some music or a video that makes you feel happy
You are loved <3
I posted these over on my Instagram and thought I’d share them here too!
I was on an ADHD forum, and someone posted the question of how to tell Laziness vs ADHD. There’s a lot of ableism surrounding ‘laziness’ that’s been discussed else where by many people on this site, and off. But it’s something that gives a lot of neurodivergent and disabled folk a shit ton of undeserved guilt that bears discussion. Here’s how I break this down:
Laziness is – I need to do this thing. I don’t want to do this thing, therefore I won’t do this thing. I couldn’t care less about the consequences, or who it hurts, as long as I get to enjoy myself. Complete lack of care for others. Instant gratification achieved.
Responsible Self Care/Mindfulness is – I need to do this thing. I want/don’t want to do this thing. However I’ve been working really hard lately. I’m feeling burnt out and exhausted. I need a break or I’m going to get sensory overload, or have a meltdown. I’m going to skip this task in order to take care of my mental and physical health. I can always tackle this task tomorrow. The world won’t end if I prioritise my health.
Procrastination is – I need to do to this thing. I want/don’t want to do it, but it’s important I do. However, I don’t want to do it just yet because it’s a big task and it’s making me anxious, and I could probably do other stuff first, so I’ll put it to the back of the list and do it later on.
Executive Dysfunction (the core ADHD experience) is – I need to do this thing. I want/don’t want to do it, but despite needing to do this thing… I can’t. I don’t know why I can’t. It should be easy right? I just need to get up, and find the item, and start the task. But how do I start the task?? There’s so many steps involed. What’s the best way to do this? This is really stressing me out because I need to do this thing, and I’m so frustrated! Why is this not happening, it’s not even this hard. But no, I’m just scrolling through the internet still. Pleeeassse, I’m begging, just start the task.
Hyperfocus (the ADHD intense state of focus) is – Cool. I’m doing this thing. This thing is really engaging. I’m so focused on this thing. There is nothing else that exists but this task. Oh crap, it’s been five hours and I haven’t made lunch, and really need the bathroom, and I’m kinda exhausted. Where did my day go!? Oh my god. Woops.
Executive Dysfunction (the Time Blindness aspect) is – > Version 1) (Time moves too fast) I need to do this thing at 3:00, which means I need to leave at 2:30 to get there for 2:50 so I can be ten minutes early and… What do you mean it’s already 2:45!? *PANIC* > Version 2) (Time moves too slow) I need to do this thing at 3:00, which means I need to leave at 2:30 to get there for 2:50 so I can be ten minutes early. Wow! I sure did get all of this preperation done early so I can leave on time! I bet it’s almost 2:30 now. Wait… What do you mean it’s still 11am??????
*As per usual, social media is not a medical source. If you want to know more about Executive Dysfunction, I have a post full of links to actual resources here.
when yr adhd does the intense Anger thing n u gotta remind yr brain that u dont wanna throw yr phone full force at a wall
gentle reminder to myself and those it may concern that “obsess over it silently, completely frozen while you just fume for six hours” is also not a healthy solution
what do I do then?
in the words of one JJ Bittenbinder, throw yourself off your rhythm!
anxiety and anger are extremely persistent in ADHD because we fixate on that input and devote all our runtime to trying to “fix” it when in reality the only way to fix it is to leave it alone. considering we are diagnosed with Chronic Cannot Leave It Alone Disease, that is Difficult.
when you’re outside one of these loops, take inventory of all the things you do that suck you into devoting all your attention to them. when i was a kid, the way i avoided asthma attacks was i played video games while taking my meds, so i wouldn’t be fixating on the anxiety and making the asthma worse. nowadays, i avoid anger spirals by also playing video games (in my experience turn-based strategy is a hyperfocus superhighway so i use those) so i’m forced to divert resources to do this other thing.
joke’s on you, impotent fury, you can’t kidnap my brain if my brain is somewhere else entirely
STREET SMARTS
Me, at my brain trying to suck me into a spiral of self destructive rage:
[id= John Mullaney on stage saying “I’m like, ‘Nah, sister. You’re not getting me to no secondary location.” / end id]
The thing about adhd is like if you hit any sort of roadblock while doing a task, no matter how small an obstacle, it’s gonna throw you completely off track.
like for example:
I’m hungry and I want to eat. But when I get to the kitchen I realize I have to cook something. It’s not that hard but it’s something in the middle of where I am now and me eating. So I end up not eating.
I’m cleaning my room. There are dirty clothes all over the floor. But my laundry basket is full and so I can’t put my dirty clothes where they are supposed to go. Now my momentum for cleaning is shut down and I go back to something I know how to do, like change playlists.
and that’s on executive dysfunction
So a few months ago I learned that when you have ADD/ADHD, in order to efficiently manage it (and thus reduce the stress that comes with it), you need to concentrate on four things:
Sleep Nutrition Activity Personal time/space
OH HEY GUYS LOOK AN ACRONYM THAT’S ACTUALLY EASY TO REMEMBER!
SNAP
Do you feel yucky and aren’t sure why? Look at your SNAP. Figure out what you’re missing.
Are you getting enough sleep?
Are you eating enough, and is what you’re eating mostly made of nutritious foods?
Are you getting enough physical activity?
Are you getting enough alone time to decompress, to reset your sensory overload, to spend time in your head, and relax?
I have found that 1) I feel so, so much better when I’m actively putting effort into my SNAP, and 2) if I feel weird, it’s way easier to narrow down what might be the problem by asking myself those questions.
10/10 would recommend.
Hey! I’m currently doing a project for a class I’m in and I need people with ADHD and/or autism to complete a survey! If you could share/reblog this post, that would be really helpful to me, thank you! https://persephonaae.tumblr.com/post/190812248763/hey-adhd-and-autistic-communities
I’m anxious about being able to concentrate, so when someone interrupts or distracts me, I can get overwhelmingly frustrated and angry. If you want to support me in making comics, here is my patreon! https://patreon.com/adhd_alien I also streamed while drawing the lines for this and I’m considering doing this regularly for patreons :>
I most often see executive dysfunction talked about in terms of not being able to make yourself do things. And that’s one of its manifestations, yes, but it’s not the only one. Another really big one that I see is something called Decision Fatigue. Making choices is an executive function, but each one that you make costs you something. The more complex they are, the more it costs– and if you’re already low on mental resources, even small choices can be completely overwhelming.
The example used most often is that of a courtroom judge, whose ability to fairly evaluate the cases they’re presiding over deteriorates during the day. Elsewhere I’ve seen the example of grocery shopping– when you’ve got a tight budget, every single item you look at requires complex cost-benefit analysis, to the point that you’re mentally exhausted and not making good choices about anything by the time you get to the register (where, conveniently, you’ll find candy, cigarettes, and scratch-off tickets waiting for you).
But even smaller things than that count.
I’ve watched my partner spiral into a panic attack when I asked him what he wants for dinner.
I’ve broken down sobbing over someone asking me I want to do on my birthday, and I’ve shut down altogether over something as innocuous as what color I want my bed to be in minecraft.
Even the tiny, mundane, innocent choices just feel like they’re too big, too much, too overwhelming.
Like with a whole lot of mental health things, it’s incredibly difficult to do anything about this kind of thing if you don’t have the words for it or the means to explain it– and damn close to impossible to explain any of it when you’re in the thick of a bad episode. But once you have that language and understanding in place, things do get easier.
Because then you can get to the point where “I don’t know” and “I can’t make a decision right now” are perfectly acceptable answers that don’t require any further explanation.
And trust me, that takes a load off your shoulders.
if youre adhd/autistic (or both like this dude here) im just here to say you're NOT annoying me when you scroll through my blog for half an hour (or longer, who cares) and reblog everything you like. doesnt matter if my notes are you and just you for what feels like a mile of scrolling. hyperfcoused on my blog? rad. autism/adhd are your special interests / hyperfixations? amazing. just got stuck in executive dysfunction and you actually have been wanting to do the laundry for two hours but youre still scrolling? i hope you can function that executiveness tm soon but youre amazing too. any other reason? dont worry youre good. thats all i had to say really, but i truly want you all to know this.
cleaning with ADHD is a nightmare. it’s an endless cycle of finding a half-finished chore and stopping the one you were already working on, then remembering that something else needs to be done and getting started on that, then finding half-finished chore and
i have the solution! i call it ‘junebugging’.
have you ever seen a junebug get to grips with a window screen? it’s remarkably persistent, but not very focused. all that matters is location.
how to junebug: choose the location you feel you can probably get some shit done on today. be specific. not ‘the bathroom’ but ‘the bathroom sink’. you are not choosing a range, you are choosing a center; you will move around, but your location is where you’ll keep coming back to. mentally stick a pin in it. consider yourself tethered to that spot by a long mental bungee cord.
go to your location. look at stuff. move stuff around. do a thing. get distracted. remember you’re junebugging the bathroom sink and go back there. look at it some more. do a different thing. get distracted. get a sandwich. remember you’re junebugging and go back to the bathroom sink.
nt’s will go crazy watching you, and if they demand to know When You Will Be Done you will probably have to roll them in a carpet and stuff them up the chimney. you’re done when you feel done, or you’re too bored to live, or it’s bedtime, or any number of other markers, you get to pick. but the thing is, by returning repeatedly to that one spot, you harness the ‘hyperactivity’ part instead of wasting all that energy battling with the ‘attention deficit’ part.
not only will the bathroom sink almost certainly be clean, and probably the mirror and soap dish too, you might’ve swapped in a fresh toothbrush, a new soap, you might’ve unclogged the drain – you will probably also have cleaned or fixed up several things in the near vicinity, or in the path between the sink and where you get the fresh toothbrush, or maybe you did your grocery shopping cuz you were out of soap, or maybe you couldn’t find a clean hand towel and ended up doing laundry.
this is good. you got shit done! it wasn’t necessarily Cleaned The Bathroom in the way nt’s think of it, but screw ‘em. things are better than they were.
plus you worked off enough energy to be able to sleep. which is not small potatoes when living the ADHD life. :D
Stuck.
(it’s 2am, and according to your therapist, you have “a whopping case of ADHD”
Hey!!! Made some thingz, thought y’all’z would like them!
[ID start: an image of a meme of a guy sweating as he has to pick between two red buttons. The first is labelled “being overwhelmed by everything so you cant do anything” and the second is labelled “being underwhelmed by everything because its too boring”]
Even if it can be a bit much sometimes and I can be a bit much to other people, I do really love getting excited more easily and falling in love with topics so quickly.
I love being able to share interest in other people's passions and loving to learn and just, falling in love with subjects.
It's not always so fun losing that love, especially because it makes it very hard to finish projects I've started while "in love" but, I'm still glad to have had those passions. I'll always have affection for them.
adhd is just [starts thing][gets distracted][forgets the thing] “wait what was i doing again” “OH” [remembers the thing] [gets distracted] [forgets t—]
Sometimes I feel like I have no self-awareness, because I’ve been on a round-about of thinking I don’t have ADHD (round-about as in I just keep thinking the same thing, going round-about in a circle) and I’ve talked to my friends and family about it.
And recently they brought up that I talk a lot and I, was kinda stumped and I asked them “I... talk a lot?” and the two people I was talking to were like “yeah... you do”. I honestly had no idea, other than that when I’m talking about a hyperfixation, past or present, I just go on and on.
I dunno, just made me think about how maybe I don’t have a great awareness of my behavior until someone points it out.
