Nevertheless, she persisted

I've been on this goddamn website for eleven years and can't be bothered to care anymore.

[statictay]

I aspire to be like Gomez Addams because I want nothing more then to run around my house with a sword and love the hell out of my spouse

[screamswhenthingshappen]

It’s been two months since my dad was found dead and I am Not Okay

[sodapoplio]

[kai-wildfang]

Can someone from the Pokemon fandom explain this, I don’t understand nurse Joy’s reaction.

[coolsville-ghetto]

Ho-oh is basically a minor deity, so nurse joy pretty much just heard this ten year old say “i threw a rat at a god.”

[camiluna27]

i threw a rat at a god

[logo-comics]

The best part? Pikachu is awake. Pokemon faint upon being defeated.

What Nurse Joy heard was more along the lines of “I threw a mouse at a god and the mouse won.”

[teacupfulofstarshine]

what is a king to a god

what is a god to a ten year old with an electric mouse

[screamswhenthingshappen]

Oops my dad died and the only way I know how to cope is to pretend it’s 2015 again.

So here I am. Back after two years. And it feels weirdly safe.

[turing-tested]

[kinglyqueenie]

[kurara-black-blog]

First Twitter, now Tiktok…

[gaynfl-moved]

sometimes i get a little stressed out because i’m living in a part of history that’ll one day be talked about and discussed and papers written and what am i doing? what have i done? laundry, barely

[catgirlcaliphate]

Sometimes I used to wonder what regular folks were doing during eventful periods in history.

Now I’m living in one and yeah, it turns out the answer is laundry, barely.

[fail-boat]

It’s okay to exist in a time of historical change doing laundry, barely.

[bookhobbit]

why is “olde vampires in high school” the big thing and not “olde vampires in college”

everyone in college is eccentric. everyone

you wanna wear full on Victorian suit? the girl in pajamas who clearly hasn’t slept in three days supports you

everyone is too preoccupied to care as long as you’re polite and follow class etiquette

multiple high school diplomas? eh. same stuff. multiple BAs? Enjoy learning chemistry AND art history! All in detail!

wandering around campus at 3am? that’s just the lifestyle tm

no matter how old or young you look it’s not really that weird, there’s sixteen year olds and sixty year olds doing BAs somewhere

big schools are very anonymous so nobody’s gonna bother to hassle you

[overelegantstranger]

the girl in pyjamas is the vampire

[themauvesoul]

Also:

If u put ur blood in a water bottle ppl will assume it’s juice and be Jealous

“Oh god I’m a monster” 20 students who r all procrastinating big projects say “same” simultaniousely and with the exact same tone

Everything is a joke so if u say “I subsist on the lifeblood of mankind” someone will go “lol what a mood”

It would take u like 100 years to major in everything

Seen sucking the blood of a fellow classmate and u r instantly the campus Cryptid and Mascot

Listen. If u have an ethical dilemma go find a philosophy major that believes in ethical subjectivism and they’ll make u so angry u forget abt whatever the fuck was bothering u

College is the only acceptable place to get into fistfights over classical literature

Literally all u need to do to avoid suspicion is be the guy that always has gum and a stapler

If u have a majestic mustache ppl will just assume ur an English major

Allergic to crosses? Cool. So r certain stem majors.

[captainlordauditor]

#there literally was a guy who bit someone’s neck at my university #in my last year#everyone was just like ‘CAMPUS CRYPTID’

also everybody is either always eating or never eating so not eating isn’t that weird

[heavensghost]

Brenna Twohy

[slimetony]

I sincerely cant remember the last time that staff rolled out a feature that improved this website in any way

[genjifap-deactivated20170826]

When they moved the reblog button to the bottom of posts

[slimetony]

Where was it before?

[catparazzi]

at the top we had to scroll all the way back up in order to reblog

[slimetony]

Wh

[slimetony]

What the fuck

[mememaster]

Reblog if you were here for top button

[thelovejournals]

“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up.”

— Neil Gaiman, The Kindly Ones

[screamswhenthingshappen]

I spent the weekend with him in Minnesota and Saturday night as we were falling asleep I was wrapped up in his arms and I was so warm and cozy and it was the best feeling in the world.

And I can’t wait to get that every night.

[wnq-writers]

“Look at how unlikely our meeting was. Look at the vastness of the universe encompassing all the things we don’t know and the things we think we know. Look at me, at us, together – here and now. Isn’t this some form of a miracle?”

— N.M.Sanchez

[mavrustheunskooled]

the most iconic moment in musical history is during a very potter musical when Voldemort jumps out of the cauldron and takes the first step and you hear that he’s wearing tap shoes and you just Know what’s coming

[svrssnp]

i am begging everyone to watch this video right now

[z7rkive]

HSHDJDJ

[azkabqn]

Dont avada kedavra the messenger

[royalturkeyz]

Everything about this is 100% canon and correct.

[garrettauthor]

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS

[chaoticallyprecise]

SO in Britain all the swans may belong to the Queen, but lemme tell you about Hamburg:

Hamburg is built around a river, so there’s many many many canals (the 2400+ bridges put Venice and Amsterdam to shame), as well as a fairly sizeable lake (here the smaller section, innit precious):

This means a shittonne of swans

(stay away from the swans) (seriously don’t go sailing on the lake because they WILL chase you). Obvs swans aren’t made for cold weather (p sure they’re all Australian immigrants actually) so Hamburg has an official job position to take care of the issue.

This dude’s name is Olaf Nieß (trying to spell his name on non-German keyboards must be fun):

This guy’s job title is “Schwanenvater”, aka “swan father”, and his job literally consists of getting swans to safety before the winter chill sets in. How does he do this, you wonder? Easy: he goes up to EVERY SINGLE FUCKING SWAN in the city and sticks them in barges. I’m serious:

Look at this dude and his swans

Swans are like Satan’s personal pet and he paddles around with barges full of them like it’s nbd.

I fucking love this guy he’s braver than all of us and deserves some recognition for his absurd line of work.

[ziggyplayedd]

hey guys unpopular opinion but you’re not a bad person if you don’t care about every bad thing happening in the world all the time, or if you do care but you’re not constantly reblogging posts spreading awareness and information

it’s okay if you’re just on tumblr to have fun and reblog things you like or that make you happy.

humans aren’t made to process trauma and suffering on a worldwide scale without any breaks whatsoever & the internet has created an unprecedented access to bad news so please never feel guilty for scrolling past it because you can’t process it! and you’re not doing anything wrong & there’s no need to feel guilty

[screamswhenthingshappen]

He told me he’s starting to look at rings and my heart is so happy