shadycharade

I have MOVED TO @turnbackthependulum!

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Hello, guys, I've moved to a new tumblr!

Follow me on there instead! Thank you very much!

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Sorry for the hiatus. Was busy. :<

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Ichigo: See, I'm trying to juggle family life and work life.. But I can't seem to find a balance. What do you suggest I do to keep everyone happy?

Renji: Quit your job. Easy.

Grimmjow: Kill your family. Easy-peasy.

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Rukia: We need to get through this locked door. Ichigo, give me your credit card.

Ichigo: Here!

Rukia, pocketing it: Thanks. Sado, kick down the door.

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(at Gin's funeral)

Ikkaku: Man, I hate funerals. I never know what to say.

Yumichika (whispering): Well, just say "I'm sorry for your loss", and move on.

Ikkaku, to Rangiku: Rangiku, I'm sorry for your loss. Move on.

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Hisagi: *sneezes in high-pitch*

Kira: Damn, you sneeze like a girl.

Hisagi: Yeah? Then how about I pound you like a boy?

*SILENCE*

Hisagi: Aight, that didn't come out right.

Kira: No take-backs!

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Gin: Did you miss me while I was away?

Rangiku: Of course I do :(

Gin: Do me a small favor. Check the porch.

Rangiku: Ehhh? Don't tell me you're here?!

Gin: ;)

Rangiku (looks outside): But there's nothing there.. OMG, this was your idea for April Fools! Why am I so dumb?!

Gin: No, I'm the dumb one. I'm at the wrong porch.

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Shinji: So, around a week ago, I accidentally slept with Isane.

Hiyori & Lisa: ... Seriously?

Shinji: Yeah.

Hiyori: You "accidentally" slept with Isane?

Shinji: Yes.

Lisa: "Accidentally", huh..

Shinji: That's what I said. Yes.

Lisa: You mean to say you actually banged Isane by accident?

Shinji (sighing): Gosh, forget it! It's April Fools.

Hiyori: I don't understand, did you trip over something?

Lisa: But why Isane, out of all the ladies?

Shinji: It was supposed to be an April Fools' joke.

Lisa: No, no, I'm just really, really curious. Why did you specifically choose Isane? There must be-

Shinji (irritated): NO SPECIAL REASON, IT'S RANDOM! YOU BOTH JUST HAD TO RUIN MY APRIL FOOLS' JOKE!

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Ikkaku: Man, I would punch someone for a hundred dollars right now.

Iba: I would PAY a hundred dollars to punch someone.

Keigo: Uh, guys? I don't think we should be punching any random person-

Renji: Well, well.. Looks like we've found the non-random person you two will be punching.

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Ichigo (to Hitsugaya): Why do you seem so moody these days?

Hitsugaya (sighing): Matsumoto's becoming more and more annoying lately. She has recently developed this habit of trying to finish my sen-

Rangiku (surprises them from behind): -WICHES!

Hitsugaya (grits teeth): Matsumoto...

Rangiku: Sangria? Sanitizer?

Hitsugaya: SENTENCES! STOP TRYING TO FINISH ALL MY SENTENCES!

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Hisagi: Hey, do you wanna be my boyfriend?

Kira: Sodium hypobromite.

Hisagi: Eh?

Kira: NaBrO.

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"Everytime I hear your voice, the single scar on me begins to ache."

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Yammy: I do feel that I have grown and matured. And I've come to love myself as a person.

Grimmjow: 'Aight. So what's the problem now?

Yammy: EVERYONE ELSE HATES ME!!!

Grimmjow: Hah! Damn right they do.

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Kisuke: *holds the door open for Soi Fon* After you.

Soi Fon: No, after you.

Kisuke: Ah, but I insist. After you.

Mayuri: *pushes past the two* After me.

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Renji: *holds up a photo of Captain Hirako back when he had long hair* Name this guy, wrong answers only!

Hiyori: Stupid baldy.

Ichigo: The inverter.

Orihime: okariH ijnihS

Lisa: Hiyori's punching bag.

Mashiro (starts singing): I whip my hair back and forth! I whip my hair back and forth!

Kensei: Uno reverse.

Love: ...

Uryu: Rapunzel with piano teeth.

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Rangiku: *grabs a hold of Gin's arm from behind* This is it, Gin, no more running. I'm so done with you going MIA from me. What's gonna be your excuse this time?

Gin: Social distancing, Rangiku.

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Ichigo: I didn't know Ichika likes toys like these.

Renji: She doesn't. Those are Rukia's.

Ichigo: ... but these are for ages 8 and up.

Rukia: *snatches the toys away* And I'm a part of the "up".