Aberoth the Unwise

the rogue wizard that the wizard council warned you about. mostly posting through my familiar, @knifecrow

[grimmscythe]

Reblog to cast heal on prev

[justryingtovibe69]

[the-punforgiven]

god I wish I had a pair of menacing black gauntlets with really sharp fingertip claws I bet it feels good as fuck to have your hands resting palm-down on a surface and then scratch some deep fucking gashes into it as you clench your hand a little closer to a fist when your evil minion delivers some bad news to you

[the-punforgiven]

ohhh fuck yeah, you understand

[john-boneman-lich-lord]

Gotta practice my "taking damage" vocalizations. The last adventurer that reached my chamber said I sounded like "sex grunts from a dad that groans when he sits down or stands up". I was so taken aback I just stopped moving and the adventurer crit me for like 2k extra damage.

[wizard-council-museum-clerk]

That's why you need to invest in saying a rasping threat or merciless quip whenever you take damage. Sure, they can get repetitive, but they're less embarassing than an ill-timed groan or grunt.

[brokentoasterrr]

sorry to wizard post on main but please do not keep more than one dragon in one space (tower, dungeon, dark scary cave, abandoned throne room etc). dragons are solitary creatures and they do not like to share their hoard. i get so sad when i see other evil wizards forcing two or even three opal scaled thorn dragons to inhabit the same room with no clear designated hoard. you can be an evil wizard without abusing your dragon. the orb can and will feed you misinformation and you SHOULD be fact checking the scrolls before making any serious decisions about dragon keeping.

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

huehuehuehuehuehuehuehuehue.. chomp

MY PEONIES!!!

[crazyintheeast]

You silly wizard , they're not even peonies, they're marigolds

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

I may not know my flowers, but I know 9th level Psychic Scream

Everyone* roll an Intelligence saving throw

*those of you with intelligence of 2 or bellow are excused

[roguewizard]

what's the DC?

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

Is it cultural appropriation to want a wizard Staff™️ as a non wizard? Or is it viewed as appreciating the culture?

I wouldn't want to be teleported to another realm for an accidental indiscretion.

it’s appreciation and it’s much appreciated, for you see, it makes it much harder for adventurers and knights and such-and-soes to kill us if they risk murdering Random Dave or Susan’s Sister by accident. The powers that be (advertisers) don’t like the optics of that one bit! So by all means please do pick up a good staff, maybe even a flouncy robe, we even sell hats in the gift shop for a very affordable $$99,99

[littleguysdaily]

This was a Patreon Request

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

Due to dire circumstance, The Wizard Council has decided to try and force a crab rave. All Wizards are called up to send crabs in support

[silliam-william]

🦀🦀🦀🦀

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

Oh silliam-william, only you and my evil advisor understand me

[therian-wizard]

🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀

[cheshire-castle-library]

🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀

[emailburner]

🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀

[greaterdemonfromhell]

🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀

[roguewizard]

🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀

[vintage-tigre]

[shebobonmydylan]

Cast curses, offer cures, profit

[wizard-council-museum-clerk]

Pretty sure the Wizard Council frowns upon this sort of behaviour.

[roguewizard]

wizard council be damned, cast those curses! on an unrelated note, I have potions for sale that could help with those boils...

[wizard-council-museum-clerk]

Boils? What boils? I think I'd know if I had boils.

[roguewizard]

oh right, sorry. check again.

[shebobonmydylan]

Cast curses, offer cures, profit

[wizard-council-museum-clerk]

Pretty sure the Wizard Council frowns upon this sort of behaviour.

[roguewizard]

wizard council be damned, cast those curses! on an unrelated note, I have potions for sale that could help with those boils...

[bonesbeetle]

my thrall told me it wanted to be more independent so i imprisoned its soul in a necklace. how's that for in de pendant you little shit

[official-amulet-posts]

official amulet post

[tarot15]

[binding-vow-merchant]

Woah man, this wizard hike is invigorating. I just saw some guy clap his hands together and say "Breeze of the Seven Mountains" or something, and everyone around him was swathed in a chilling mist and had their exhaustion vanish. People didn't even look up, that's how captivating the Twelveswood is. I'm over here casting granola and level 2 cooling. I think I just heard someone say "Power word: Refreshments" up ahead. I gotta get up there.

[dogpuppy]

[wizard-council-museum-clerk]

Yeah man, this wizard museum is so chaotic. I just saw a visitor clap his hands together and say "Summon 10,000 hammers" or something, and every display case around him shattered immediately. The security camera didn't even go onto him, that's how common this is. I'm over here casting Repair Ceramic and level 2 Do Not Touch. I think I just heard "Power Word: Awaken Dinosaur Skeleton" two groups over. I gotta get into grad school.

[bluewizardnonesense]

Yeah, field trip day is always rough

[wizard-council-museum-clerk]

She's the only one I trust to lead a group of children around the museum.

[volcano-wizard]

I will NOT. apologize for casting Magma Fissure in room 16b. It was dark in there and now the thermal light makes it easier to see the exhibits that didn't fall in the magma fissure.

[wizard-council-museum-clerk]

That's what the storm wizard said about summoning lightning snakes in gallery 34-S. He had a point about the lighting, but less of an argument against all of the eaten people.

Time to call maintence, I guess.