Let Me Introduce Myself...
This space isn’t a guide, a blueprint, or something anyone is meant to follow. It isn’t here to inspire, motivate, or “help.” It exists purely as somewhere for me to put the thoughts that otherwise stay trapped in my head, looping until they start to feel louder than everything else.
I’m a woman in my 30s who has spent most of her life moving in and out of difficult mental spaces, sometimes quietly, sometimes catastrophically. Recently, after years of telling myself everything was under control, I realised I’d gained 15lbs, and for reasons that are hard to explain to anyone who doesn’t live inside my brain, that moment felt like something snapping. It wasn’t really about the number. It was the sudden awareness that I had drifted further from myself than I wanted to admit, that I had been sleepwalking through parts of my own life, and that I needed to reach for something I could steady with my own hands.
My brain has always leaned toward absolutes, toward the feeling that if I can’t fix everything, I should fix nothing. So instead, I’m starting small. Food feels measurable, trackable, controllable, a place where effort has visible edges. That’s what this blog is for: logging meals, logging thoughts, logging the small daily attempts to regain a sense of direction, even if the rest of life still feels messy and unfinished.
This is a private outlet, nothing more. A quiet corner of the internet where I can empty out the noise, leave it somewhere outside myself, and maybe, occasionally, look back and see proof that I kept going.
CW: 152
LW: 135
GW: 120
This will be achieved by sticking to strict daily food plans and a keto diet.
I will get back to the person I was.
