she who was - she who is - she who will be

[shewhowas39]

Juniper & Starlight: An Astarion x Dark Urge Fic

Between the nightmares, prophetic visions, and violent hallucinations, June is losing grip on reality, but she has enough awareness to know that Astarion's flirtation is part of some sort of con. He barely even likes her, after all. When she decides to call his bluff and play along, thinking he'll back down, she's surprised to discover that she and the vampire have more in common than either could have anticipated. And his touch might be the only thing that can keep her sane.

(art by @/redraccoonart)

pairing: Astarion x f!durge (June)/OC rating: Explicit genres: romance, angst, emotional hurt/comfort, some horror elements, game retelling current chapters: 33/?

Read on Ao3

***

PREVIEW (snippet from chapter 8)

“Let’s get comfortable, shall we?” 

Scratch growls again, moving to stand protectively in front of June before Astariion can shift closer to her.

“It’s all right, boy,” June assures the dog, reaching out to give him a pet.  “He ain’t gonna hurt me. Not real bad, at least.” Scratch whines and leans into her hand as she pets his ears. “Go on, now. Go check on the others.”

Scratch looks between June and Astarion for a moment before giving one final growl in Astarion’s direction and then bounding off toward the fire and the circle of sleeping party members.

Astarion watches the dog go with clear fascination. “The mutt has taken a liking to you rather quickly, hasn’t he?” He turns to look at June again, a flirtatious smile curling his lips. “Though, who could blame him? You are a captivating creature.”

“Captivating?” she repeats. “Really? That’s the word you’re gonna use for why a dog might like me?”

“It’s the word I’ll use for why I like you.”

June doesn’t have the energy to call his bluff tonight. Instead she just sighs and asks, “So how do we do this?”

“You lie back,” he says, his voice a low purr as he shifts closer to her. “And let me take care of the rest.”

June resists the urge to roll her eyes as she unfolds her legs and lays down on the bedroll. She wills the tension from her muscles as Astarion moves to hover over her, crawling up her body until his face is only a few inches above hers. One of his hands moves her curls away from her neck before sliding beneath her head and cradling it gingerly. 

“Just relax,” he whispers. But June can’t help feeling like he’s talking to himself, not to her, when he says this.

This thought is quickly chased away by the sudden, icy pierce of fangs in her neck. June gasps and her back arches, but this only serves to press herself closer to Astarion. The pain fades soon enough, overwhelmed by a rush of adrenaline. June’s heart races, her body trembles. She finds herself clinging to him in an effort to hold herself still, one hand in his hair and the other on his beck, clenched in the soft fabric of his shirt. 

Astarion’s chest rumbles against hers as he makes a noise of intense satisfaction into her neck. His knee pushes between her thighs as it presses down into the bedroll, and the hand beneath her head tightens in her hair. His other hand rests on her ribs before it begins to make slow, soothing caresses along her torso. 

June’s breathing becomes deep and steady and the trembling eases as she begins to relax against him. This is the first time she’s been touched since waking up in that pod. She hadn’t realized how starved she was for physical contact - for tenderness - until now. 

It’s so much more than that, though. She can feel her blood flowing into him. It’s a connection unlike any she could have imagined. She doesn’t know when the last time she had sex was - or with whom - but she can’t imagine it compared to this sort of intensity. This intimacy . This is what it feels like to become a part of another person. This is what it feels like to sustain someone. 

This is what it feels like to be consumed. 

Her heart rate slows and her vision begins to swim. It’s a pleasant sort of delirium as her consciousness begins to ebb away. Astarion keeps drinking. The hand on her side moves so that his arm slides under her back, pulling her even closer. June has the distant realization that he is as lost in this as she is. He isn’t going to stop.

Does she want him to?

After all of the visions of gruesome acts and urges to kill, she can’t help but wonder what it feels like to be the victim. And with what happened to Alfira, June thinks she probably deserves to die. For the sake of everyone around her

And if this is what dying feels like, it’s not so bad.

[shewhowas39]

SNOWED IN - A BG3 Big Bang Fic!

(art by @abogwitchnamedsage )

hello all! it's been a while. live has been rough recently which has put a lot of my fun fic writingon hold. but i did get a chance to participate in Dazzling LIghts and Faerun's Darkest Nights! my first ever big bang! AND it gave me the chance to work with the amazing @abogwitchnamedsage who did this beautiful art of June and Astarion!

title: Snowed In rating: explicit genre: angst, romance, smut summary: June and Astarion head to a remote mansion in the mountains for a reunion with their friends several years post-Absolute. but when snow keeps the others from arriving, the couple has very little to do besides fool around...and confront an argument that has been simmering for months.

enjoy!

[shewhowas39]

week later reblog lol

[abogwitchnamedsage]

It's here!! My first contribution to the @bg3-winter-big-bang, a collaboration with the wonderful @shewhowas39 and her work, Snowed In! If you're like me and are a sucker for some tasty smutty and angsty Durgstarion, give it a read on AO3!

Detailed close-ups under the cut. 🎨

[shewhowas39]

could not have asked for a better partner for this fic!!! thank you so, so much!!!

[shewhowas39]

I just spent the night reading all the published chapters of your Juniper & Starlight fic on A03 and just wanted to say how much I loved it. Thank you for your writing, I can't wait to see what happens next!

aww thank you so much!!! that means a lot.

irl has been kinda a mess which has kept me from writing, so the fic is on pause but it will be back. i love these two weirdos too much to let them go.

and i did just get the chance to publish a 3 chapter big bang! so slowly but surely i am coming back intot he fold! in the meantime, encouragement and kind words like this mean so much to me! so thank you!

[shewhowas39]

SNOWED IN - A BG3 Big Bang Fic!

(art by @abogwitchnamedsage )

hello all! it's been a while. live has been rough recently which has put a lot of my fun fic writingon hold. but i did get a chance to participate in Dazzling LIghts and Faerun's Darkest Nights! my first ever big bang! AND it gave me the chance to work with the amazing @abogwitchnamedsage who did this beautiful art of June and Astarion!

title: Snowed In rating: explicit genre: angst, romance, smut summary: June and Astarion head to a remote mansion in the mountains for a reunion with their friends several years post-Absolute. but when snow keeps the others from arriving, the couple has very little to do besides fool around...and confront an argument that has been simmering for months.

enjoy!

[shewhowas39]

i know i'm 5 years late but i'm so mad about Jaime Lannister

[shewhowas39]

Just thinking of you and realized it’s been awhile. Hope you’re doing well.

Don’t forget to drink water dear ❤️

thank you so much! i appreciate this a lot.

i'm okay. just been swamped with work stuff and some IRL family drama. but i haven't forgotten y'all and i'll be back with a new chapter in the new year. promise! just gotta get through the mess of work before year's end.

[shewhowas39]

i'll be back shortly!

hey friends! (and especially Juniper & Starlight readers!) please dont' think i've forgotten about you! i know i've been MIA for a month, which is very not like me. but some IRL stuff has come up in my family that has really just thrown me for a loop. don't worry - everyone is healthy and safe - but some stressful interpersonal shit is going on.

anyway, i miss y'all and i miss my bitchy little vampire man so i *promise* i'm not disappearing on you! i'll have updates soon!

[shewhowas39]

dear universe - if you could provide me with some really good fanfic for The Nightshade Crowd series to help me cope with the wait til July for book 3? that'd be cool

[shewhowas39]

ahhhhh!!!! the wonderful, beautiful, talented, amazing @andauril surprised me with this lovely art of my durge, June, from my fic, Juniper & Starlight!!!

LOOK AT HER HAIR!!!!!!

go check out andauril and her work! she's amazing!!!

[shewhowas39]

On Repeat

Rules: shuffle your On Repeat playlist and list the first five songs in a poll, then have your followers choose their favorite.

i was tagged by the amazing @amoremagnificentbastard, and i'm STOKED bc i love music tags haha. i'm gonna tag (no pressure) @dungeonsdragonsandlawyers @khywren and @kittenintheden

which of these songs is your fave?

"Good Girls" by CHVRCHES

"Like a Villain" by Bad Omens

"Dangerous Hands" by Austin Giorgio

"Conscious" by BROODS

"Don't Save Me" by Chxrlotte

Voting ended onOct 27, 2024

[shewhowas39]

On Repeat

Rules: shuffle your On Repeat playlist and list the first five songs in a poll, then have your followers choose their favorite.

i was tagged by the amazing @amoremagnificentbastard, and i'm STOKED bc i love music tags haha. i'm gonna tag (no pressure) @dungeonsdragonsandlawyers @khywren and @kittenintheden

which of these songs is your fave?

"Good Girls" by CHVRCHES

"Like a Villain" by Bad Omens

"Dangerous Hands" by Austin Giorgio

"Conscious" by BROODS

"Don't Save Me" by Chxrlotte

Voting ended onOct 27, 2024

[cinnamontails-ff]

October Fic Recs

Another round of fic recs, inspired by @shewhowas39' format! Sorry they're not particularly seasonal, but I'm a coward and don't deal well with horror, soooo :D

1) Death and Taxes by @pyrekite

For everyone who loved seeing Astarion embrace the power of taxes in Accountant's Guide, look no further than this! Absolutely incredible concept of post-canon Astarion returning to his magistrate roots and coming to Rolan's aid as he's struggling to pay all the taxes Lorroakan & Ramazith have been dodging for centuries. The idea is a 10/10, but really, it's Astarion who makes it as fun as it is. He's so competent when it comes to the bureaucracy of Baldur's Gate, yet every bit as sassy as we know him, and it makes for such a fun read. Only 1 chapter so far, but boy, do I hope for more.

2) The Scientific Method by @obsessedwhyyes

I am convinced that this was written for me and me alone (but I want everyone to see it, so I will gush). It has all my personal favorites: 1) A main character who is a scientist as well as a chronic overthinker, 2) Astarion realizing the target of his nice simple plan is a virgin and going "Hell yes!", 3) the two of them exploring intimacy in a way that's soft and caring, but also really, really hot. Seriously, the smut in this is absolute god tier, and the way it's woven into the MC's worldviews and the way she struggles with opening up and letting herself feel is just absolutely superb. Two parts are out so far and a third is on the way! We have been blessed!

3) Don't forget you love me by @canon-in-too-deep

This is not just any old Gortash fic. No, this is the Gortash fic. The one that finally makes you understand what the heck people find so charming about the raccoon man. He's an absolute delight in this as the exasperated, yet patient and loving husband to a post-canon Tav who suffers from selective amnesia, causing her to nearly fireball her husband to death when she wakes up to him one morning, thinking he's still her sworn enemy. The writing is incredible, so fun and light, with beautiful parallels between their initial courtship and married life now. Honestly, if you've ever been curious about the whole Gortash thing or if you're just looking for a sweet, incredibly well-executed rom-com, this is it.

4) Invisible Strings by @slothquisitor

A gorgeous modern AU where Astarion is a failing social media influencer who doesn't know that the girl he's talking to/falling in love with on a dating app is actually his geeky roommate. I'm not completely caught up with it yet, but the character writing is stunning, the prose so effortlessly cute. Astarion's struggles have been translated into a modern context beautifully and his love interest is set up to be a complex, well-rounded character with her own backstory and issues to work through. I cannot wait for the two of them to get closer as the story unfolds!

5) Say yes but only if you want to by @amoremagnificentbastard

Fascinating take on a rather shy, inexperienced OC wanting to take care of Astarion with some good old-fashioned oral love, and how the offer affects him and his trauma. The dynamic between these two is lovely and I'm always stoked to see stories that seamlessly combine mature, honest conversations and intense horniness. And once we do finally get to that blowjob, I am sure it'll be well worth the wait :3

[shewhowas39]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

rating: Explicit pairing: Astarion x f!durge (June)/OC fic summary: Between the nightmares, prophetic visions, and violent hallucinations, June is losing grip on reality, but she has enough awareness to know that Astarion's flirtation is part of some sort of con. He barely even likes her, after all. When she decides to call his bluff and play along, thinking he'll back down, she's surprised to discover that she and the vampire have more in common than either could have anticipated. And his touch might be the only thing that can keep her sane.

chapter title: Burning chapter summary: in which Astarion relives a good memory, June is woken up in a very pleasant way, and Lae'zel wants a taste. content warnings: consensual/pre-arranged somnophilia, mention of dissociation, violent intrusive thoughts, violent hallucinations, fire

A/N: um...how on earth are we at 150k words, guys? and HOW am i still in act 1? y'all have been amazing and i hope i can continue entertaining you for the rest of this wild ride! <3

***

PREVIEW

Astarion crawls up her body until he’s hovering with his face just over hers. She stares up at him with her mismatched eyes, blinking slowly at him, the flush of orgasm coloring her pale cheeks. 

“Goodmorning, darling,” he says.

“Morning,” she says. “That was…real nice.”

“Only nice?”

“You fishing for compliments?”

“I absolutely am. And I think I deserve them.”

June chuckles. “After that? Yeah, I think you do.” She takes a minute, still catching her breath, before saying, “Astarion, that was more than nice. It was amazing.”

Astarion preens. “Go on.”

“I ain’t gonna just lay here and inflate your ego,’ June says.

“Why not?”

She laughs and leans up to kiss his nose, but Astarion swerves to catch her mouth with his. The kiss starts sweet and slow, but it steadily becomes more heated as both of their hands roam. His cool skin is on fire with her touch. Who knew that it could be so pleasant to burn?

[shewhowas39]

reblog for the monday crowd

[keian44]

I recently commissioned a Shadowheart portrait (with both hairstyles!) from @needlesslycryptic and look at how wonderful they turned out!!

Highly recommend working with @needlesslycryptic! Here's a link to her commission post: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/view/needlesslycryptic/763691500862341120

Emergency kitty vet commissions:

Hello everybody! I've taken my cat Sabrina to the vet recently and i need to cover for some blood test and ultrasound bills( it was probably

[eldritchelfwriter]

Part 1 of the finale to Shadowheart Begins now out ...

“Shadowheart,” a voice whispers.

Shadowheart opens eyes heavy with sleep and squints at Florwyn kneeling over her in the darkness. She can barely make her out.

“Sorry to wake you,” Florwyn whispers. “I didn’t want you to wake up and find me gone and worry.”

“Wait - what? Where are you going?” Shadowheart asks at once, still trying to work out what is going on in her tiredness.

“Storm coming.”

“Oh,” Shadowheart says, noting the sound of light rain on their tent roof – and the barely contained excitement in Florwyn’s voice. Of course Florwyn must go – otherwise lightning will fall onto the camp. “I’ll come with you – you can’t go alone.”

“I won’t be alone,” Florwyn assures her. “I need Jaheira’s spell, and Karlach said she’d kill me if she didn’t get to come next time there was a storm, even if I had to wake her.”

“That would make Karlach my number one enemy, right underneath ‘elder brain’,” Shadowheart mutters tiredly, and Florwyn laughs softly.

“Sleep, my love,” Florwyn whispers, mussing Shadowheart’s hair and kissing her gently on the forehead. “I’ll be back soon.”

“’K,” Shadowheart says, eyelids already drooping again.

She wakes again an hour or so later, and Florwyn has still not returned. She has a vague memory of having been woken again by thunder and drifting back off; she can still hear the patter of on the tent roof.

Having gotten used to sharing a tent now, she feels strangely bereft to wake up without Florwyn next to her. She looks at the empty space beside her where her sorcerer should be and sighs, missing her already ...

READ MORE:

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[nothazellevesque]

it’s so unhinged that gale literally has that bed summoning spell in his back pocket that he only whips out ONCE in the entire game for a romance scene. mister dekarios we are sleeping in the DIRT and you could’ve been summoning four poster canopy beds for us this whole time? ohh if astarion and minthara knew about this spell they would’ve killed gale before that orb even got a chance to. you made Thee Minthara of House Baenre sleep on rocks for no reason???