Ragnar didn’t know why they were so bad at talking about their feelings. He figured it had something to do with the fact, that they were both two of the most stubborn people in Midgard. But, it was just..it was easier, when they were not sure the other was listening. But, they could die like this. It was rather fitting that they die together, but for the first time in a long time, he hoped that he died in some sort of blaze of glory with her: he wanted Valhalla. If it existed, he wanted to be there with her.
“You can question many things, but never question that.” He shrugged. “What can I say? Ecbert always had his own agenda. He made people think things were what they weren’t. He paid with his life, but much like I wanted to, he went out on his own terms, in that bath of his, well under my sons orders. Ecbert saved me, and he didn’t hold me prisoner. It’s his sons and his guards that did this.”
He shrugged when she said she killed Aslaug. Oh well. “The crown is heavy, Lagertha. It is too heavy to bear alone nor share with someone else. Why do you think so many Kings wind up dead? It should stay in our family. Aslaug was never our family. I mean, she gave me my sons but you know what I mean. Bjorn never would let Ivar kill you. You know it and I know it. He’s always been still attached to your apron.” He laughed then harder than he had in a long time.
“They thought the best ally they could find was Rollo? My traitorous brother, who would betray himself, if it meant he could gain something? I’m sure that went amazing for them.”
He sighed. “I know there is a new King here now, but no one lets me speak to him. I believe it’’s his brother who keeps me locked up here..the King wouldn’t keep either of us up here. He’s Athelstan’s son.” He sighed. “I’m tired of fighting. You’re not leaving now. Granted, you can’t move but hey’s that’s something.”
The bonds around her wrists hurt, & she almost felt grateful that they didn’t cuffed her with metal. The leather was already tight enough for her to feel the pulsating veins in her hands. She had come a long way, she wasn’t sure about the future, but she thought she could die soon now that she met him for one last time. Although, she expected to reach Valhalla one way or another, but the hope didn’t seem to satisfy her expectations lately.
“ King Alfred. It’s King Alfred now. ” She had met him plenty of times, but guards all dressed in black leather - perhaps from the other son’s court - had thrown her in jail once they found her after the battle. “ I think they will not kill us. Why are they keeping you alive for so long then ? We are pawns... we can be useful. Did they come to you often ? ”
Lagertha tried her best to release the pain in her arms as she leaned against the mat behind her with a long sigh. She noticed he didn’t comment on Aslaug’s death, for what she knew he heard everything from her speech. “ You are not mad I killed her ? I am mad myself. This was not me Ragnar. ” The shield-maiden rewatched the scene in her head, all over again, & her words still hurt. Just lies. “ She said you were dead... well she lied. But she said she saw you dying with Ivar. & it was like...” She was currently watching, her eyes lost in the vague, “ She did not feel anything for you Ragnar. & the next thing I knew I was killing her. ” She would leave the topic at that.
“ Yes they called Rollo. They won though. Ragnar... tell me. Do you think the Gods abandoned us ? It is like we are cursed. Gyda, you, me, Athelstan... I hope Björn will resist.” A tired smile appeared at the memory of her son, “ He is my boy, always had been. I think he is the only person I loved more than you. ” She didn’t feel like she was embarrassing herself. “ We could have hours & weeks to wait here... what did you for during all this time ? ”